My fiance and I have been together for about 8 years and engaged for almost 2.
My dream wedding was to always elope just me and my SO even before I met him, I wanted to always do this since I was young. My mind never changed it has always been my dream wedding and I have told him multiple times while we were dating, when we moved in together after we got engaged, and now during the planning.
He always agreed but since we got engaged he wants a party with all of his friends and family and family friends. He has a big close family, a bunch of friends and family friends. When planning on who to invite my list was about 30 people, and his was over 100 people. So I tried to pivot and give him what he wants and tried to plan, but he gave 0 feedback and was 0 help. At one point I said I don't even want to do this and I am doing all the work. I am shy, I hate being the center of attention and money is tight. My parents do not have the means to help pay and my relationship with my mother is tough so she's not someone I would go to for help. It was all on me to do something for him and his friends and family.
We stopped talking about wedding stuff for a while because all it did was cause fights and now he agreed to elope with us and his parents will attend. While planning it he got annoyed and said I was selfish for getting my way and made me feel like I am crazy.
I am at such a crossroads right now, I really have no idea what I have done wrong to be called selfish. I tried not to be selfish.
Thank you for listening to my rant. I don't have close friends to talk about this stuff with so this is my time to let it all out.
