Engagement Gift

It probably would be good to get a list of ideas how the counseling is useful. Then find the ones that are maybe most enticing. I'm just guessing. Like ways of resolving financial issues and general handling of money, how they would resolve differences or fights, how they will do holidays.

Then just offer it as help and just what you think is good for everyone that gets engaged. If they are interested the advice, tell them you will cover the cost. I just think that approach is better than calling it a gift.

I would be weirded out to get something like that out of the blue. I’d think it was meant to be a message that you didn’t approve of the marriage. I think it could work if you had a conversation about the importance of counseling for good reasons rather than thinking there’s something wrong, they seem receptive to it, and you ask if they’d appreciate the gift.

I'm not sure how well premarital counseling would be received as a gift. Instead, you could gift them books that cover marriage, finances, etc. for them to read and discuss with each other, such as "The 7 Principles For Making Marriage Work" or "The 5 Love Languages".

Although pre-marital counseling can be beneficial for any couple, I think there’s a better than good chance that they, especially FSIL may read into the gesture and resent rather than appreciate it. An exception might be if they told you they wished they could afford it or something like that.


Are they very young or is it that they have they been together for a year? Otherwise I’d mind my own business.