Exes family at my wedding?

My FMIL and my exes mom are apparently friends (from before we got together) and here's a convo my FMIL told me about: Exes mom: my son really effed up that relationship...

FMIL: his fuck up was our gain and we couldn't be happier!

This was pointless but I thought that was so sweet of FMIL! But no, my exes parents are not invited. It's just kinda weird, and you know they would show pictures to my ex and I just don't want to deal with any possible drama.

@Celia, that's the exact situation for me. My first ex passed away three years ago, but I have always remained close with his parents. I hadn't added them to my guest list, but I felt really bad not doing so. I still don't know how I feel about it.

You mentioned that they were family friends before you and your ex got together. Are they still close friends with your parents?

And explain that to FH and his family how

@Runawaybride

No they no longer talk like they used to.

If you want a fresh start I would say no, it would also make your FH and his family feel awkward.

It's weird that they are acting this way.

Hard pass on inviting them.

Thank all of you for your suggestions, I'm taking it all in!!

It sounds like these folk are no longer in your life, so based on that alone I wouldn't invite them. It also sounds like their behavior is very manipulative. It's wrong that their actions/words make you feel guilty about your upcoming marriage. It's none of their business! On that point alone I would also exclude them. For my money, they're 2 for 2 on the "don't invite" list.

You said FH thinks it's disrespectful if you speak regularly.... so why would you even want them at your wedding? Lol. When my ex and I broke up, I broke up with his whole family!

@mariah D FH says do what will make me happy; he just want me to be happy. I stopped talking to them regularly because I felt I would be showing disrespect to him. But you are right breaking up means the whole family. I guess I just feel bad because they were so good to me and were always there for me. I feel bad because they are hurt! ;(

@OG Alecia sorry I am confusing you. I have not spoken to their son. I have spoken to and seen them at family gatherings. However; I use to talk to my ex mom everyday, but we stopped. Now they are hurt! I am running I hate that they have to be hurt though.

When their son and I broke up, I was much younger and thought I would be okay talking to them regularly. They would always say even though our son and you are not together, we love you like our own biological daughter. We Always want to be in your life. I am just a sucker . They will be okay; I should not feel obligated to invite them.

I wouldn't. The fact that they're guilting you probably has more to do with you moving on than anything and would absolutely be crossing a line with me.

@Meagen my FH said that last night, he said he understands they were good to me; however in the end it is still in the back of their mind, wishing I was with their son. That's why they are trying to guilt me....

I'm considering asking my exes mom to come babysit at our wedding (she runs a home daycare). We dated like 7 years ago and are both engaged now so clearly have both moved on.

I don't think I'm going to though, mostly because although we're friends on Facebook, we haven't spoken in real life in a long time.

I agree they are playing mind games with you. They upset cause time passed and they let you out of their sight for a moment and you about to be taken for good. I'm sure they thought they would have you back as a daughter n law one day. If they truly happy for you they can love you from a distance

@Mrs. K

Ya really have moved on; both of you getting married that's good! So , are you going to find another babysitter?

@beautifulqueen2b I think you are absolutely right. My FH said that.

I'm really good friends with my exes sister. I was her maid of honor, and her daughters god mother. Now she is one of my bridesmaid. It sounds like you and your exes parents aren't that close anymore. I say slowly start cutting those ties and move on.