Here is the background...before I met my fiance, I began renting my parents home, with the hope to buy it in the future. I met my fiance a few months after moving into the family home. He had his own home and three kids who are used to that house as well. Although my family home is/was important to me, we both agree that his house was best for our situation (less adjustment for kids, safer neighborhood, easier for financing, etc).
My sister and BIL had been interested in the family home but were strained financially. We began talking about a possible way for them to rent it, us back them, etc.
My mother is very controlling and used to "her way or the highway". Well on Thanksgiving, after the festivities, my fiance brought up the house and that we would like to try and make it work for my sisters family. His approach may have been abrupt and a bit forward but he said what we were all thinking.
A few days later my mom begins writing harsh texts in our family group message about how my fiance has ruined everything. That we are too good for the family home, we have destroyed it (we actually painted it all and made improvements), that his kids are too good for it and that she feels sorry that I am with him.
Well, I am currently no longer talking to my parents (my Dad just goes with whatever my mom says). My brother is upset now too, since he got dragged into the middle of drama (he was supposed to be a groomsman).
Our original wedding venue was my parents new farm. I have decided to just find a new venue and begin planning there. There is no fixing the situation, as it snowballed to something so much more than just a conversation about a house. My mother holds resentment for years and years. My fiance is hurt by my mother's words about him and about the kids. I totally understand and agree with his perspective.
So I am planning on not inviting my parents to the wedding. Also, my brother may choose not to come since he "doesn't want to take sides". The wedding is in 7 months and planning needs to go on. I am 37 and this is my second marriage. He is 43 and it's also his second marriage. Does anyone have any thoughts/advice/etc?
Side note: My mother didn't speak to her own mother for five years over one small incident.