Well this all started way before I met soon to be husband. To sum it up... my parents are divorced (I was a baby) so both sides do not really get along. Then when I met the my love things were fine till people’s true color came out. His parents and grandparents (that are still alive) are just nothing but toxic people. His sisters and brother in law are wonderful!! We do not have much contact with his parents and grandparents and we are fine with that. The main issue is my father and my paternal grandmother. They have not like him from the start for very stupid reasons. My father made it his goal to talk horrible about him to the point where my grandmother is not pleased with him. I am not close to my father he really was not much of a father to me. Let's just say he is a jerk and we will leave it at that. Any who, this man was expecting to walk me down the aisle and have the father daughter dance because he is the father. He was ok with me compromising and not getting what I want so he could get the attention that he believes he deserves. I have already thought of ways for him to "help out" and get attention. But he is not ok with that either. I know for a fact that there is no chance of him helping to pay for the wedding. I already decided that my Pap-pap (who was my father figure) will walk me down the aisle and have a grandfather and granddaughter dance. I already have a song and its perfect. My father did not take it well and has been acting like a child for awhile. On top of this my grandmother who I have never been close to has this tendency to say she is coming to an event and before or the day of call and says she is not coming. She did this on my 25th birthday. She thinks everything is about her and her appearance. The venue that we fell in love with has a policy where you can not take left over food with you.
Here are what I need advice on. Do I comprise for my wedding and give my father what he wants or do I stick to my guns and have it my way? Also, do I not invite my grandmother to the wedding and reception because I know there is no way she will be coming? Thank you