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Beginner October 2020

Feeling guilty about guests who have to travel

Katie, on October 13, 2019 at 9:27 PM Posted in Family and Relationships 0 7

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I will be getting married next October and the ceremony/reception is about 10 hours away from my family, but much closer to my fiancé’s family. Since I have a small family (only about 10 people), we figured it would make more sense to have it closer to his family and in the state he and I currently live in. I spoke to a family member today and the family member made a comment about how my brother and his family probably wouldn’t come because of the distance. I know travel is expensive, and I would never EXPECT anyone to come who didn’t have the means. I’m not upset that some may not be able to make it, I’m mostly just feeling some type of way at the comment. I feel guilty now for asking my family to travel/spend money for a wedding. I guess it just bummed me out and made me a little less excited for the wedding. Does anyone have any experience with feeling guilty like this?

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Latest activity by MrsD, on October 14, 2019 at 1:03 PM

Devoted October 2021
Fany · on October 13, 2019 at 10:18 PM
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No, I don’t because I compromised by promising that would make it a priority to visit where my family lives and have a celebration with them (even if it’s just a potluck gathering at a family member’s home) within the first year of marriage. That way, they don’t have to feel obligated to travel for a wedding when I’m coming to them shortly after.
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Devoted February 2020
Allyson · on October 13, 2019 at 10:48 PM
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I’m having my wedding far away from my family too. It is a sad thing, but I feel like for something as special and monumental as your wedding day, you shouldn’t feel guilty about asking people to travel a bit. You are doing it for logical purposes, not to have a fancy destination wedding and to just force everyone to travel.
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Super December 2021
Alyssa · on October 13, 2019 at 11:03 PM
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You have to do what makes sense for you and your fiancé, if people can come and celebrate with you, wonderful. If they can’t they will send their regrets. You don’t compromise your vision for your guests.
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Super February 2020
Jeanie · on October 14, 2019 at 6:40 AM
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People will always complain about something. I’ve heard people complain about driving an hour to a wedding, and I don’t think that’s even remotely considered destination. Don’t second guess yourself.
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Master May 2019
Cyndy · on October 14, 2019 at 9:36 AM
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You have to do what makes you happy and the people that can come will be there. Everyone complains about something so do what you and your FH want.
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Legend June 2019
Melle · on October 14, 2019 at 11:00 AM
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Don't feel bad about something like that. Like pp said someone will always complain about something.
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Legend July 2019
MrsD · on October 14, 2019 at 1:03 PM
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Don't feel guilty. If people can't come, it's not the end of the world. Weddings are expensive for guests even if they are in town, that's just how it is.
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Feeling guilty about guests who have to travel

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