Female at a bachelor party

I've been invited to several bachelor parties, but I can drink most of those bitches under the table anyway...

One of my male friends is organizing MY bachelorette party.

I would not be cool with the double standard though. That would be the focus issue, not the co-ed bachelor/rette party.

Her being invited and attending isn't a big to me. However, i would be bothered about the dbl standard and the impact that would have on me and how my children view gender norms. I'd focus on that instead.

I wouldn't care- I think if you trust him and know nothing is between them, why does it matter?

I think its an over reaction but you know your FH better than we do. If you feel this is out of the norm than say something about it. If its not really out of the norm and your just being sensitive then try to let it go. Of course that's easier said then done most of the time...

Well- I just read the double standard post- he needs to lose that- I'd have huge issues with his attitude if it were me, like deal breaker kind thing for me!

@Jamie @Lucio@Last

I am not going with him on his trip bc we have children and it will not be a kid friendly visit. Our youngest is only 2 so I am not comfortable leaving her overnight yet so I decided to stay home with the kids. And this trip was planned just for him to visit with his friends and have a good time.

Though is probably be irritated about it if my FH did this, there's not much you can do. You can't control the guest list for his party

This wouldn't bother me at all. It's about trust.

If they wouldn't allow it for you, then I'd see an issue with it.

Dude fuck the double standard thing. I'd lose my mind. You have every right to be upset about this.

I just don't see the need for her to really be there, jealousy issues or not. And if he knows it bothers you or you don't want her there, it shouldn't even be an argument, aren't your feelings more important than him having some random girl there?? In my opinion it shouldn't even be questioned.

"When I said to him that I will invite a male friend to my bachelorette party he said absolutely not.

I think I am having a bit of resentment bc I recently discovered that he has a double standard on opposite sex friendships. He says that I don't need to talk to guys but when I mentioned his friendship with her he got irritated and said that she doesn't count bc she is his sister. "

Inviting a woman to his bachelor party is not in itself a red flag. (It might even shame the guys into not letting things get out of hand.) But this attitude is a HUGE red flag. The rules that apply to you should also apply to him. If he thinks that a) he gets to make the rules, and b) he can make them different for you than for him, I'd run screaming from this marriage.

I attended a very good friends bachelor party.

As the only female.

It was awesome.

Samantha... For what it's worth in six years with my now husband.... I have exactly two questionable moments where there were miscommunication, once from him by me. And once from me to him.

And they were both easily solved with clear communication.

Trust issues stem from either miscommunication or actual questionable behavior.

Sounds like you don't trust FH. That would be more worrisome to me. My FH has female friends and I have male friends. No big deal.

Honestly you shouldn't worry about it. He's your FH. My FH has a friend he regards very similarly and I've only met her once and we've been together three years. She lives far away but back when they were close they went through a lot, so even though they don't talk all the time they're still bonded. I do understand you getting upset but I'd advise you not to worry about it.

I trust my fiancé 100%. However, having a female at his bachelor party would make me uncomfortable. Not for fear of him cheating, but just the premise. More importantly though, is his lack of taking your feelings into consideration. If you're uncomfortable then he should respect you enough to either 1) not invite her or 2) have the three of you become closer so you grow to feel comfortable.

That's the therapist side of me though.

The human side of me says, to hell with his double standards. If you can't have a guy at your party he can't have a girl attend. End of story.

I'd say heck no that's a guy s party