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Dedicated September 2020

fh Bachelor party - cancelled

Sabrina, on June 10, 2020 at 11:57 PM Posted in Parties and Events 0 9

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So my FH is the last of the guys to get married and was really looking forward to his bachelor party. It was going to be at a lake house where they can go fishing and boating. He was really looking forward to his brother and friends sorta making this trip about him because as my FH is very laid-back and goes with the flow and this was one thing that wasn't about what others wanted to do.

His brother's wife was the one who didn't want her husband (my FHs brother) to go because of COVID. Meanwhile our state is in phase 2 and the bachelor party isn't until the end of July. So everything was cancelled.
I feel so bad because he wanted this. My question is, does anyone have any suggestions on what I should/could do for him that same weekend it was supposed to make place? He now doesn't want to go away for the weekend so whatever the suggestions it should be something local and more "at home style".
Here were some of my thoughts:**I did suggest he talk to his brother and tell him how he feels (disappointed) then I went further to say maybe suggest to your brother a zoom call with all the guys and drink while on zoom or a virtual poker game. He shot that down and said that he wants no part of planning and that his brother should know he should do something.
Here are thoughts he doesn't know about:**I could be more like Monica on Friends and hire a stripper (not a lady of the night which is what Monica actually did for Chandler LOL).**I could make the whole weekend about him and make his favorite meals or order his favorite food!**Decorating the living room with candles and flowers and doing a date night, but who am I kidding that's what I would want from him HAHA!
Anyways, I feel so bad and want to put on my planning hat and take control over getting his friends involved and have them do something for him, although he doesn't want to do anything without his brother.
Any advice even if it's something I don't want to hear is appreciated!

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Latest activity by Chelsea, on June 11, 2020 at 4:49 PM

Legend June 2019
Melle · on June 11, 2020 at 12:04 AM
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That’s so nice of you to want to do something. Sucks that he couldn’t have the weekend he wanted. My husband had an activity day with his friends - he just did karaoke and rock climbing. So if any of them are down for it, it could just be a half day of activities. But if no one is and you just want it to be you and him - your idea sounds good!
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Dedicated September 2020
Sabrina · on June 11, 2020 at 12:07 AM
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Thank you for the idea! The only isssue is the sister in law won't allowe my FH brother to do anything. Maybe I can suggest something for them in August that's just a fun day out golfing...that doesn't require being closer than 6ft.
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Super June 2021
Elizabeth · on June 11, 2020 at 4:39 AM
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If this was me, I'd reach out to the brother and tell him that while you respect his wife's preferences, it's still his brother and that your FH thinks the brother should know to do something. While it could be disappointing for the weekend, it could also be upsetting for much longer if your FH is expecting the brother to do something and nothing happens. Then you can try to work with the brother to make a plan come together that includes social distancing and still involves the brother and hopefully the other guys.
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Expert October 2021
Samantha · on June 11, 2020 at 4:54 AM
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Could the party be reorganised for the end of August? Otherwise, Could you suggest to his brother, to organize a party for his birthday? I know it's not technically the same thing. But, realistically, bachelor parties are just a reason to get together.
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Dedicated September 2020
Sabrina · on June 11, 2020 at 8:47 AM
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From my understanding is the brother didn't want to try and reorganize something for this summer. Maybe a birthday party would be a nice idea though.
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Expert October 2021
Samantha · on June 11, 2020 at 9:03 AM
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That's a shame, are any of the other groomsmen up for a party? I know it's disappointing that his brother can't be there, but that doesn't mean your FH can't go to the cabin with his other groomsmen/friends. They can do something together at a later date.
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Dedicated September 2020
Sabrina · on June 11, 2020 at 9:22 AM
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My FH refuses to do anything without his brother there and his brother already got his (most) of the money back for the house.

The whole situation bums me out! If I was his brother I would be making it up to him, but his brother is on the cheap end of the stick when it comes to things that don't revolve around him.
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Expert October 2021
Samantha · on June 11, 2020 at 4:11 PM
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Sorry to hear that. Unfortunately, there isn't much you can do if neither of them are willing to compromise.
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Beginner July 2021
Chelsea · on June 11, 2020 at 4:49 PM
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My FH has a very similar situation happen! But we pushed back the wedding so they are reorganizing the party for the fall.

I’m not sure what your FH likes but here are some ideas Tickets to a football game college or NFL for the early fall? (If they open that up)
A day at a place like top golf or Dave and busters (if they have something like that by you)
If he’s a big sports guy, do a super bowl like party and play a good old recorded game and order a ton of amazing game day foods!
Invite local friends to come over for a cook out and beers day! (So a surprise so he doesn’t complain about his brother not there)
Maybe do like a fun ass scavenger hunt around the city! You could incorporate a drinking game into it!
Take him to go golfing and if yo I hate golfing (like me) drive around in the cart and drink vodka sodas with him 😂
If you have an amazon fire stick maybe do a “master class” together my FHs brother and his wife did a mixology one and apparently it was SO much fun.
Take him to a local river or lake and bring beer and just do a lazy river day! Or go hiking! (With beer lol)
See if there are any cool local hip cigar and whisky bars that are owning back up by you!
I would say plan something if they don’t, make it a surprise and invite all local friends to come and then he can’t complain pre-event his brother didn’t there and he WILL have a ton of fun even if he says he won’t.
I have 3 brothers and they can be annoying as crap, so while his brother should know better.... he just doesn’t. And you can’t really change that. If you want say your peace to get it off your chest but just take the reigns and you’re a badass woman who can plan this better than his brother probably can anyways 😂😂
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fh Bachelor party - cancelled

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