fh told me he wants a prenup

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There should only be one prenup between you two and it doesn’t really matter who drafts it so long as the other party has an opportunity to review it and amend it (in that, you don’t just sit down and sign it without having put it past your own lawyer first). If he wants his sister to draft it because it will cost him less, that is totally fine if that’ll save him some money so long as it is something she is able to do.

If you go ahead with the prenup, you need to find your own independent lawyer to represent you and review the prenup. How much it costs will depend on their fees. I’m not really sure where the arbitrary $1,000 came from. If he’s happy to contribute towards your legal bill that will be great.

View Quoted Comment His sister drafting a prenup should not be a problem for you in any way. She is his legal counsel, regardless if there is a familial relationship. Also, he is offering to pay $1000 for your portion of your prenup, so he is not paying “nothing”. On the contrary, he is actually voluntarily paying money he doesn’t have to, in order to lessen your financial burden! And the fact that you are already getting so bitter about this preconceived “unfairness” over money comes off as a precursor to what you would be like in a divorce. This attitude is probably giving your fiancé even further hesitations about how “honorable” you would be in a divorce.

Just a thought... but while you are trying to figure out why he doesn’t trust you (your perception)... be honest with yourself and figure out what it is about him that you don’t trust?


You keep saying “he’s know me since I was 15....” So if you’ve known him since he was 15, why are YOU concerned that HE would do something to hurt you?
I really suggest that the two of you sit down with a professional who can go over what a prenup is all about so you have all the information you need to make informed decisions together.

View Quoted Comment Why his sister drafting his prenup is a major issue for you? I don’t know if you have a sister, but if she were a family lawyer, wouldn’t you ask her too? I don’t see how it could be unfair. Plus, he’s offering to pay half of the cost for yours.


If you’re worried about them doing something fishy with the prenup then you’re the one with trust issues, not him. You must have your own lawyer anyway to represent your best interests and review it before you sign it (and again, he’s paying $1,000 towards yours when technically his cost is $0)
Also, have you thought that maybe he’s just trying to look after the kids as well? I don’t know your specific case, but in some situations, stepchildren (specially if the marriage happened before they turned 18) have as much right over your assets as your own children.
My advice would be to take the time to openly talk with him about how you guys think and the reasons behind your opinions, your personal and common goals, how the prenup would fit or not with your plans while putting emotions aside to come to a rational conclusion (you’ll have to do this anyway when preparing for the lawyer)

View Quoted Comment Maybe he's protecting you and your assets from his crazy ex having any claim if they are still dealing with court issues and alimony.

Even if you don't have a prenup drawn up, most states have their own laws on the division of assets if you are getting divorced. I would rather set those rules myself then get surprised if something does happen.

I can understand why you feel that way. I can also understand why he would want one. Try and talk to him about it and how it made you feel. Best of luck to you