Fiance afraid to fly!

If it is a genuine phobia then he may need to seek some sort of therapy, like counseling or hypnotherapy. If flying isn't an option, then perhaps look into doing something that would be accessible by train. I know it isn't Costa Rica, but perhaps the Florida coast or another beach location? Amtrak trains are a good way to travel if flying is completely out of the question. A few weeks ago I took an Amtrak train from NY to Virginia and it was a 4 1/2 hour ride.

Personally phobias are very real things and should not just be dismissed. Controlling one takes a lot of effort. I would say change your honeymoon for the sake of him. Even if you convince him. Panic attacks are not fun and worse on a plane. It could ruin part or all your honeymoon. In addition not being respectful of him just to visit a country. Honeymoon should be something you are both comfortable with.

I agree he should seek some kind of therapy. Especially since you said it was due to his grandpa. Maybe he can also get a prescription for the trip, and take a dose a while beforehand to make sure he doesn't have any reactions. My first plane trip was to Italy though and the first leg was going to be 8 hours, I was 21. I told my Dr I was freaked out and afraid of heights and she gave me xanax or valium or something. I ended up not needing to take it because other than take-off and landing it didn't bother me. I hope you can get him over it! If not, I guess you could take a train somewhere or take a cruise if you live near a port, or take a train to a port, but that just sounds exhausting.

Me fiance picked our trip to Italy but has anxiety so he spoke with his dr and instructed to touch base as it gets closer so they can prescribe something for the trip. I'm pretty proud of him the longest on a plan he has been is 3 hours

Honestly if it's a true phobia I think you should respect his wishes not to fly. Could you take ground transportation to a port and do a cruise that goes through the areas you want to see?

This really depends on how serious the phobia is. From what you are saying, it sounds like it may be trauma induced. Talking to a doctor and possibly getting a prescription to help him manage it may be a good idea. With my fiance, I have to make sure he doesn't have a window seat and there is drink service (a few cups of wine is enough to calm his nerves). Everyone is different and you have to make sure he feels comfortable enough to go on a flight at all. Otherwise you may want to look into a cruise or possibly a nice roadtrip!

What happened to his grandpa? I hope he seeks help - it can be overcome, and your world is going to stay very small otherwise.

This is your FH's choice. If he wants to live with it, you need to find another locale for your honeymoon. If he wants to learn to deal with it, there are therapists who can help.

If it’s truly a phobia he’ll need therapy to overcome it and it may take a great deal of time. A phobia is a lot greater than a fear, phobias of things are diagnosable specific mental illnesses with specific diagnostic criteria required to be met to be diagnosed. Even if it’s just a strong fear, I’d still suggest therapy. It’s not the type of thing you can suck it up and do it if there’s a serious phobia or fear.

Thanks for the feedback everyone! I will consider it all when we finally make our decision. 😉

You mentioned his phobia is due to his grandfather... what happened?

My FH is also terrified of flying, we are driving to the honeymoon now. We had even already bought the plane tickets and he's just going to take the hit money wise since its not likely that we'll get our money back even having the insurance (they don't consider being afraid to fly a valid reason to get the money back). We recently flew to NC to visit my sister and he was miserable the whole weekend because he was terrified to get back on a plane in a few days. I don't want him to feel the same way for our honeymoon. I'd take your fiancee's fears into account while planning the honeymoon, if he's that scared to fly it might affect your whole honeymoon. I'd try to talk to him about a place you can get to without flying, you'll both have more fun if you both feel comfortable.

I personally have the same issue. If it is a true phobia (sounds like it because it’s severe enough to prevent a major trip), he should go to a psychiatrist for therapy; a year of treatment might be adequate to at least get him on a plane with the help of a sedative. All depends on the severity of the problem though.
I’d say my case is moderate...I was tired of letting my fear stop me from getting on a plane. My psychiatrist prescribed lorazepam for me. It works wonders. I usually fall asleep before takeoff and have someone wake me up when we’ve landed. If I don’t have it, I’m a wreck...so much so that I start hyperventilating and crying (yes, real tears!). It’s mentally and physically exhausting and super embarrassing. Therapy is helping me resolve my underlying issues, and I’ve become less anxious over time.

any people don’t realize how debilitating it is; tell your FH he’s not alone and seriously consider professional therapy. Good luck and congrats!

*Many people

View Quoted Comment His grandpa has never flown on a plane because of hearing about plane crashes so my FH is the same way. Ugh... He legit has no reason not to fly!