Fiance hates my dress choices

This is one reason I don’t go shopping with anyone. It’s a dress you alone should be in love and comfortable with.

You look amazing in both! Whether it's one of those dresses or another, go with the dress that you want and don't show him any more pictures! 1) I guarantee he won't remember it's the same dress and 2) when he sees you on your wedding day, he'll think you're the most beautiful bride ever no matter what. The dress you're wearing won't matter to him. If he has the nerve to say otherwise on your wedding day, run far, far away lol

That was insensitive af- but without knowing you were going to pick one, maybe he thought he was being helpful? Short answer- get what you love and you want. He isn't wearing it- you are, and it's important you feel beautiful on your day.


Longer answer- changing yourself to please your FH can be a lifelong issue once it starts. I'm sure he cares more that you're happy rather than him liking the dress (because, again, he isn't wearing it.) Most cis-het men don't care too much about female fashion anyways. Pictures also won't do justice to the final result on day-of.
If you're really stressed about it, then talk to him. Tell him you love lace and it hurt your feelings, and ask if it's really important to him. I can guarantee he will tell you it isn't, and he wants you to get what you want. My FH has made comments about wedding dresses in a few movies and I get the feeling he likes a simplistic, satin look. My dress is beaded lace with appliques on the skirt (picture previously posted if curious.) It did stress me out but he assured me that he doesn't really care what I wear, and he wants me to be happy in whatever I pick. I'm sure yours will too 💜
I'd also be a smartass and buy lace lingerie for the honeymoon so I could ask him if I still looked like a grandma lace tablecloth 😂

Absolutely wear the dress you want! Your fiancé will love you in it, and please remember that after alterations your dress will look even more beautiful than it currently does in your pictures. My mom came with me dress shopping and hated the lace sleeves of my dress, she also basically said it looked like old lady tablecloths haha. She absolutely loved the dress on me after alterations and once she realized how much I loved the dress.
You want to feel comfortable in your dress, and not choose one for someone else. You also want to make sure you love the way you look in pictures for decades to come.

You're right. I showed him the pictures from a phone. He wasn't there in person and couldn't see me beaming behind the mask. My mom was with me and she cried when I put on the long sleeve dress. I felt gorgeous and like a bride. It made me feel butterflies and I absolutely loved it so much. Maybe the day of, the sheer emotion of seeing me walking down the aisle, made up, and with a smile on will make him see the beauty in the dress I choose. He told me "you could wear sweatpants to the wedding and I'd think you're beautiful. I just prefer something more simple."

Wear the dress you love, don't worry about his opinion. Once he sees you all dolled up looking like a bridal beauty he won't think it's grandma like. He will just see his beautiful bride. And you will have the dress you love and the reaction from him you want.

Get the dress you love.

I would go with what you like versus what he likes. Because at the end of the day there’s really no point in you wearing it if you don’t like what you’re in and if you don’t like the way you feel in it. so everyone has such a different fashion sense that it doesn’t make sense to weigh someone’s opinion so heavily above yours

You look absolutely gorgeous in both dresses! Lesson learned- no matter how tempted you are, don’t show the dress! I know when he sees you walking down the aisle, he’s not going to remember what dress he saw in the picture.

View Quoted Comment This is soooo true! I learned it the hard way. Since the beginning of our marriage, I wear what he likes. My taste in clothing turned to be someone my family didn’t even recognize. Only 3 years ago, 21 years of marriage, I made it very clear, it’s me as I am, or I’m gone, I had enough stressing over small things. Now when he says something bad about my choice of clothing, I talk back and defends myself. This is me. He married my heart, not my look.

View Quoted Comment I completely agree with this.

Pick what YOU love! The long sleeved gown is beautiful on you, very elegant!
Besides, men don't know what they like. I showed my fiance different styles from pinterest to see what he liked and he went from "I could totally see you wearing something like that" (to a gorgeous ballgown) to "don't wear something so dramatic we can't even dance together." Later as I was making other dresses for costumers he was like "I hope that's not your dress" (apparently they were too simple) 🤦🏼‍♀️ In the past 10 years I learned that if I ask for his opinion he tends to say he doesn't like it and then when I'm dressed up and wearing the outfit his jaw drops and says how much he loves the outfit.So guess what, I am making myself the dress of my dreams which has a 5 yard train and I can't wait until he sees it! Lol 🤣

Do you think you could find something you love as much but is a little bit more accomodating to his taste? I agree you should love your dress because that will absolutely show.

My FH seems to be different then most men according to the other posts. He cares, has an opinion about these things and I am pretty sure he will notice details on my dress and if he likes it or not. However, I am also sure he will tell me I look beautiful on our wedding day, no matter what. But I talked with him before I went dress shopping about what he liked and what were absolut no-gos for him. Fortunately, we have similar taste and had a similar idea. I absolutely love my dress but I have to say I only looked within the parameters we agreed on (not strapless, a bit of lace, simple). I want him to like the dress. Maybe without him in the picture I would have chosen a different dress but I am wearing it for OUR wedding.

Maybe is there a compromise, like some lace but not all-over lace? Just an idea.

I've showed the picture of my dress to a few people (and every one was very polite) but I always felt uncomfortable showing it to people because it still needs a lot of alterations and they are not very good pictures.

Wear the dress you feel gorgeous in!

I bought my dress alone ao that others wouldn't try to sway my opinion

You are an angel!! It is not his choice. He chose you. Not The dress, princess. You wear that. 😍

LOVE that second dress with the long lace sleeves. You look so beautiful and happy (and also NOT like a tablecloth 🤦‍♀️)!


Do you wear a lot of lace in your normal life? His grandma's tablecloth might be the only place he's seen lace before so that would make sense that's what he identifies with it and he didn't mean it in a hurtful way. Just a thought!

View Quoted Comment I don't wear lace in my everyday life. I have like no sense of style at all lol. Jeans and a comfortable shirt usually. I also work in a doctor's office, so I'm in scrubs most of the time lol. But I have always envisioned my dress having long lace sleeves. I know this is the one day for me to dress up and feel beautiful.

I love the one with the sleeves! Pair it with a simple veil, hair & makeup and he won't even know it's the same dress. Wear what you feel good in!

I really seem to be the minority here. If you love the dress and you are confident your fiancé will love it when he sees YOU in it, buy it. But if it will keep you up at night and you are not sure, I would keep looking.

I have to admit, I understand where your fiancé is coming from with his comment.

I would see if you can find a dress that you love but that maybe has less lace. That's just my two cents. If you try on 5 more gowns and you keep coming back to this one, get it. But I would at least try something else. Especially since this was your first appointment.

I am thinking of something with a lace bodice and long lace sleeves and a chiffon or tulle skirt. I didn't have much time to google but there are options out there. I found one from David's and one from Stella York. Again, I didn't do an extensive search and I am sure you can find others. But personally I would go with an all-lace-dress without the sleeves or with the lace-sleeves but not all over lace. Again, just my personal opinion and taste and everyone else here seems to love your dress and tells you to not worry about your fiancé's taste.