Fiancé straying..

I'm sorry hun but I'd run as fast as I could

He may have not acted (simply because he couldn't someone willing) but the intent was there and he was actively seeking someone. There is NO WAY I would still get married.

So sorry. People are quick to say what they would and wouldn't do but no one knows how it feels til it actually happens to them. Go with your gut.

Ashley, what would you tell someone else to do? If one of your friends came to you and told you what you are telling us, what would you say to them? What advice would you give them?

HOLY HECK... NO! I didn't read any other comments, I am sure I am echoing a lot of other girls. Honestly... how could you EVER get past this? How could one EVER forget that he posted an ad on CRAIGSLIST looking for oral sex! geeeeez...... That is.... I don't even have the words. Meeting an other woman at a bar? Yes, something happened. If nothing else, he is dating that woman it sounds like.

How could you possibly walk down the aisle and feel happy in 9 days?

I am not saying its going to be easy, but I am saying honestly think if you could see yourself walking down the aisle towards this man in just over a week and feeling happy.

Don't be embarrassed. Have your mom or best friend call the guests. Better now than go through an inevitable divorce later. He is most certainly not going to clean up his act all of a sudden after marriage.

So sorry you are going through this xoxo

Nope nope and nope.

Cut your losses and get out now

In the words of the wise Dan Savage, Dump the motherfucker already.

Craigslist asked him to click through multiple screens, confirm his post, and then publish it. He clicked all the way through not giving a fuck about you. Don't give a fuck about him.

Ashley I'm so sorry this happened to you. I have been there....but it was too late for me I was already married to him at that point. We eloped and I was young and in love ( well in love with being in love) and I found out 2 months after we got married that he was on a dating website talking to over 50 different women and he gave out his number and exchanged numbers. Long story short.....he claimed nothing happened and he never met up with any of them or anything else. I chose to believe him and it was a huge mistake for he lied about all of that. He continued to cheat and I didn't find that out until 2 years later after I decided to stay and HE told me he wanted a divorce and then the truth started to unravel. Don't put yourself in the situation I did. Sometimes things fall apart so that better things can be put together. Im happy and engaged to an amazing man over a year after my divorce was final. I pray that you'll find the courage to do what is best. Sometimes things work out....but do you really want to start off your wedding and what should be one of the happiest moments of your life clouded by this information? If you had a daughter what would you tell her? No one can decide but you. God bless.

You absolutely need to cancel the wedding you are worth so much more. He will only do it again. Praying for your honey

It looks like what I was going to say has been said by many people. I just wanted to say I am sorry he did this to you. No one that truly loves and respects you would treat you (and your relationship) that way.

BYE BYE!!

This decision is yours. No advice we give will help you decide. You have to decide what's best for you

Ashley,

I also want to say I am very sorry you're in this position. You deserve much better than this behavior. No one deserves to be treated like this.

The obvious answer aside, the very fact that you're questioning it shows that you know deep down that you know you should not get married to this man, especially in 9 days.

I agree with the PPs you should get tested if you haven't already, trust but verify what you believe you already know. Don't leave your health in the hands of someone who's willing to lie and go behind your back.

If you decide to stay with him you are accepting these behaviours. Without saying the words your actions would be an acceptance of these hurtful behaviours. You deserve better.

As awful as it is 9 days before the wedding, at least it's not 9 days after the wedding.

There's nothing easy about what you need to do. But you are better off knowing and acting now than after you are married. Marriage will only exasperate issues. Anything he does now will only be worse when you're committed for life.

Sending you warm wishes and exponential strength.

No I wouldn't. But I am sorry this is happening. How do you know nothing happened ?

He posted that ad and went to that bar with the intent of having sex with another woman. And hid it from you. In my mind hes already cheated on you even 'if' nothing physical happened.

Nope.

Hell to the no. Marriage doesn't make a shitty person stop being so shitty.

Absolutely cancel. You can't even postpone at this point, bc with that kind of betrayal, continuing your relationship at all would be starting over. With even less initial trust. And how would you ever be able to take his vows to you seriously? In nine days, he would be vowing to love you for better or for worse, forsaking all others, be talking about how he knew you were the one.... all lies! This behavior is not love, he can't forsake even a STRANGER for you now, and how could you be the one when he's tramping all over town? You. Can. Not. Trust. Him. And you cannot build a marriage on this.

Please, do not marry him. Your marriage will be built on lies, and will not survive. It'll cost you less, financially and emotionally, to cancel now.

I'm so sorry this is happening. You are worth so much more than he is treating you, and you deserve so, so much better. Don't do this. Sending you strength and encouragement.

I consider that to be cheating. He'd be gone in a heartbeat! I'm so sorry.