Fix a friendship after a wedding!! Any advice is welcome!!

Oooo, I've been in your friend's shoes so lemme give you some advice: apologise, profusely. Take responsibility for your lapse in the friendship.

I was in a wedding eons ago where the bride was a complete bitch to another maid and I. She then stopped talking to us after the wedding. She didn't contact me until 6 years later, and not to apologise. Suffice it to say, I didn't take it well and told her what I thought of her. We had been friends for 20 years prior to her wedding.

If she had apologised off the bat, I would have been way more receptive.

Thank you everyone for the advice! When i contact her i will let yall know how it went! Wish me luck!

Good luck! You got this and good for you for prompting yourself--that is a BIG step!

I've also been in your friend's shoes, and ten years later, we still aren't friends.

I was going through a very low time, with a lot of snowballing, when one of my friends was engaged. She had multiple showers. I missed ONE because of something going on in my personal life. It was not one of the showers the BMs helped plan, and I apologized for not being there.

She had no understanding what-so-ever and stopped talking to me entirely over not being there...even though she knew what I was dealing with. I had already bought my bridesmaid dress.

She texted me out of the blue, no apology, no let's talk, but literally just said I still needed to be in the wedding.

I showed up. Filled my spot for her even numbers. Felt so awkward, and that was the last time I saw her.

I'm guessing we were around your age, based on you mentioning college. If you want her in your life, take her to lunch, apologize to her, and DO NOT give any excuses.

You don't get to decide someone's finances or what they have going on in their life. Friendship is about understanding, learning we're all different, and forgiveness.

I think this could be a great life lesson for you. I'm early 30s now, and still meet people who struggle with this. Use it as a learning tool and growth.

ETA: details.

Thanks for all the advice!!! It was very helpful!

Yeah, apologize. You're in the wrong here.

I think part of it is the fact you all are so young. People drift apart after college anyway. Its likely that this friendship was not going to last anyway.

You can't dictate how someone spends their money. I have a friend (my MOH actually) who couldn't meet up with me for lunch unless I paid. So I paid. No biggie, we often take turns paying... well then a week later she told me she got the new iPhone 7. Pissed me off. But it is whatever.

Apologize.

This is all very helpful! Glad i reached out to ask!

Honestly some friendships aren't meant to last forever. Reason, season, lifetime. Sounds like you were a season for her.

It's really not that big of a deal to ask people not to judge you *rolling eyes*

But just come right out and apologize for it. If she doesn't want to forgive you that's her choice but be prepared for that and to just move on from the situation. Life goes on

The way I see it, you shouldn't call this friend at all until you're ready to admit you were 100% wrong.

We like to think that our friendships are unconditional, but friends will leave you in a heartbeat if you treat them badly or if there's any hint of Bridezilla-type attitudes.

In your case, it isn't just that you badgered her about the dress, but you never asked her budget ahead of time. You do this before you even begin to look at dresses. You did it backwards by finding a dress and then asking who couldn't afford it. Of course no one will say anything. It's incredibly awkward and no one wants to be the person who admits "I can't afford my bride's dress." Then when she told you she couldn't buy it then, you continued to make her feel like crap by making sure she knew everyone else wants to buy it now and she has to as well. Frankly, I wouldn't give a flying fig what the other girls want. If I tell you I can't afford something right now and you don't respect that and drop it immediately, I will cut ties with you. That's called respect and it's kind of a very fundamental thing about friendship. Then, you judged her for buying a dog when you have no right to judge what she spends her own money on. There is no part of this incident where you are in the right and she is in the wrong and unless you can admit that to her, trying to mend things will be a waste of time.

Just to keep anyone who is interested updated. I got in contact with my friend, due to a long distance we were unable to met up like most of yall suggested. we did however talk, I said sorry she accepted, I told her I wasn't a very good friend, but she also said she could have done better as well. Things work out great and we are still friends. Thank you for all the advice!!