FRIENDORS..Don't do it!!!

@Tamara - it's not okay to me. Personally, I would hate for my mother to be working at my wedding. I want her to sit back, relax and enjoy herself. As far as your MOH doing you makeup, nope.

Don't mix business with pleasure, ESPECIALLY on your wedding day.

I had a friend do my makeup for my e-pics, but that's about it. I did not hire her to do my makeup for the wedding. I invited her as a guest and that's her only "role".

@Tamara, your mom might be a pro but don't you want her to be enjoying the day & the moment... not stressing over working on the day of her daughters wedding?

@JRae: but if they offered to do it... Isn't that their decision if it's too stressful for them or not?

So here goes...

So she's my sisters BFF, I've known her my entire life..she's a professional everything. Seriously, she truly is a jack of all trades. She does most things well, professional, has a great attitude, intelligent, a people person, etc. so she agreed to coordinate my wedding and do whatever I needed. Needless to say, she's been hard to reach, doesn't return emails, but I've made excuses because I know what her profession entails. I just thought she would make time for me since she Volunteered '. I remember asking her if she had enough time to help. She assured me she did. Anyway the last straw was me asking her if the programs were ready after a month of waiting. I told her that I was getting married in 2 weeks and if they weren't ready just give me the rough draft and I will finish. She told me that she knows my wedding is in 2 weeks and that 1. She has a speech do in 1 hour. 2. She has to present to a board in 2 days. 3. She has scholarship things to do for her child. 4 , 5, 6....Seriously, she laid out everything that she has going on.. You Agreed to help me, I didnt ask. But ur upset b/c I'm texting you. She keeps saying, it will be done. So I haven't even asked her to help me with other stuff that I assumed she would help with b/c she told me she would do anything I needed. Thank God for others. It won't be a disaster. It's just frustrating.. like really??

@Tamara read the other comments. Doesn't matter if they offer. Let your family/friends relax and enjoy the day with you. Don't let them worry about anything.

My mom offered to do my food/decorations for my wedding. Am I letting her? HELL NO!!! I told her you will do no such thing. You will be enjoying the day with me. I want you take every minute in, and not worrying about thing. I hired professionals to take care of everything. That's what they are there for...

"Mom, thank you so much for offering to do my make up, however I want you to be able to relax with me and enjoy the day with me! Thank you again for your generous offer and I know you're great at your craft, but please enjoy this day with me as the MOB not a worker!"

@Tamara, I realize this is an UO but I don't see a problem with your mom doing your hair for the wedding if it's something she is skilled at and you know she will do a good job. In fact, I would imagine a mom might find it an honor to be able to participate in her daughter's wedding that way. If you get the sense, even the tiniest inkling, that she's annoyed by the task, take it off her plate for sure. But if it's something she is excited about doing then I don't see why not.

Tasha, that's horrible. Fire her and get a professional.

ETA. Not sure if you can fire a "volunteer" but fire her and let her know her services are no longer needed.

My wedding is in 2 weeks!! I can't fire her. I can, but that would be me shooting my self in the foot. I know she s gonna do a great job the day of... I just wish I would've gone another route from the beginning. I'm too late in the game.

That was really unprofessional of her to dump on you. Don't let her mess with your wedding.

Take the bull by the horns. "X, I realized after our talk/text that you have a lot going on. I very much appreciate your help but you sound like there's too much on your plate right now. My wedding is just too important to me to be put on the back burner. I will stop by today at x time and pick up everything you hav done thus far. I very much appreciate you! Thank you for everything you've done! "

Because she volunteered and is not getting paid your wedding details will be done when she gets to it. If that's ok, then ok. If not, get the stuff and move forward. I am so sorry she is creating more stress than help.

@Tamara No. It's your gift to her to get her off the hook. Let her be a guest and enjoy the day.

@OP don't worry about not having programs. No one really needs them.

My co worker had a family member officiate, he got certified online, turns out her marriage was void because the site he used was a scam

Just cover yourself make sure you look into everything else that you need and make your own programs just in case. I hate to say you should have known but the fact that you had to ask her if she had time you should have had in your head that she wouldnt give you your all. Shame on her to even treat you like that weeks before your wedding. Just make sure you stay on top of your wedding details

@Tamara - read Tasha's story. Doesn't matter if they volunteered!! Look - her person volunteered, and she seems to be very involved with other shit.

@Tasha - uh, yea you can fire her. I mean, you're going to end up doing all this shit on your own anyway. I mean, programs aren't a big deal, but with her reputation so far, how can you trust her to follow through on your wedding day??? What if she's late? What if she just doesn't show and gives you some b.s. excuse? The point of it all is to get married, but still. She's useless at this point. MOVE ON.

@Tamara, my FSIL who is part of the BP is a professional stylist and MUA. She's honestly more talented than the two people that I am hiring and paying to take care of my hair and makeup on my wedding day. I would rather have her do it. But I can't imagine asking her to work on that day. And I also can't imagine the stress if she did something not to my liking.

@Tasha I agree with PP's, go take your stuff back. Maybe there's a DOC available today who could help you finish everything up.

Following up on what @CuteNickname said: I know of someone who hired a DOC just a few days before her wedding, and was able to negotiate a lower price because the bride had already done all the work. She just needed someone to manage everything.

Don't give up hope.

Thanks!! Y'all are all so right! I was the 'it won't happen to me, I've known her all my life'

@Tamara- no, I'm a pretty good judge of character, but when it comes to ur day, you will want things done a certain way.. and you don't want friends/family telling you what they ain't gone do. Smh. You want a professional saying, 'yes ma'am, we'll take care of that for you '. Pay them and tip them and all is good.

Tasha, I'm so sorry this is happening to you. If I'm reading your post correctly, you essentially said you know she has a lot of things on her plate, but thought she would make time for you because she volunteered her services. I can understand why you thought that, but objectively if I have 10 things to do and I'm getting paid for 9 of them, that 10th job is getting pushed back.

My Sister's Friendor mishap: My sister insisted on an ipod wedding reception. One of the guests was supposed to act as the DJ for this - but the bride or groom ended up being the ones trying to organize the playlist through the "shuffle" while said DJ friendor continued to get drunk. It was not ideal, and no matter how much I protested (even offered to pay for DJ) she would have done it anyway. And I'm certain my husband had to go out at least once to get more booze for the guys. But they paid over $5000 just for the reception hall - an upscale museum...