Gap between ceremony and Reception

This always happens when the ceremony is at church and the venue is somewhere else. They will hang out outside and take pictures of you and the bridal party and then get to their cars and fix their hair and makeup and drive to the venue and then park there and it'll be time for your reception.

Lol about the lawn games. Every idea is debatable, @Celia. The point is, it's possible to have a crowd that would enjoy that! And there's nothing wrong with that. It's okay if a couple wants to have games, especially during a transitional period that won't be long.

"Your guests will understand" -- I mean, maybe. They'll probably be bored and angry.

People who only have a gap in order to have several hours to get the perfect instagram-worthy photo... I'm probably pissed at you. I get your situation. Yes, this makes for a longer day, but these people are adults. Youre not asking them to participate in American ninja warrior style tasks during the gap. They can go to a bar and relax. Just make sure the gap isn't too short- there's a happy medium. You don't want a long mass, then have people go to a bar for a drink, then have to rush to finish that drink to make it to your reception on time.

I'm familiar with the "catholic gap." I'd say a resounding YES to providing some cool ideas for your guests to do in the meantime. A nearby museum, maybe? Possibly a manicure place? Or the bar is always a good suggestion, lol. Maybe provide a freshening up kit as a welcome idea so they can refresh in the meantime? Just throwing ideas out there.

How exactly do I word it when I want to mention on our website or in the details card....some bars or restaurants guests can go to during our 2 hour gap? There is an awesome bar on the way to our reception hall, about 5 min away. I just have no idea how to word it...

Well if you're considering sending your guests to a bar, it's polite to pick up the tab, as you're still "hosting" them during the gap. I would invite them to relax and have a drink on you at xyz bar.

We are attending a wedding in a couple of months with a Catholic ceremony at 3 and cocktail hour at 7:30pm.

I think I've been to more weddings with gaps than without. I'm not sure why people can't just do their photos before walking down the aisle.

Can you push the ceremony start time back 30-60 min so the gap is not as long?

I say move your appetizers cocktail hour up if you can. I would rather hang around that then hang around town. I only went to one wedding like that and I skipped the reception.

I've attended catholic gap weddings and survived just fine. The weddings that were local we just went home and either had other wedding attendees over or took a nap in a couple of the cases.

Yeah I think giving them ideas for something to do to kill time shouldn't be too bad!

If half your guess are catholic it probably wont be noticed.

I had no idea who was at our ceremony and who wasn't and frankly I didn't care. So, if people wanted to skip because there was a gap, more power to them.

"Nobody will die, LOL"? LOL? Because it's funny? Seriously? What's funny about dressing, driving, writing a several hundred dollar check, attending a wedding, standing on a receiving line-- and then being left at the side of the road (or the side of the church) with, at most, a list of "fun things to do" when the only reason you're in that town is to attend a wedding (not to check out the statue in the town square of the great lattes at the local cafe)? Did somebody really say "scavenger hunt"?

After all of the planning, the DIYs, managing the typical wedding related conflicts, the angst over finding the right shade to incorporate with the wedding colors, the endless interviews with potential vendors, the "MOG is wearing white" issues, the "should I fire a BM" drama, the RSVP nightmares, the money spent on the largest and most expensive party you will probably ever host, the decision to have and pay for uplighting, the task of the seating chart, the stress of compiling a play -- and no play - list, the tastings, the BMs issues, the kids vs. no kids conundrum, and the time and money spent on creating the "right" invitations, everything suddenly becomes super casual when it comes to that "huh?" period between the ceremony and the reception, to the point of invoking the "nobody will die" attitude, because the couple wants their Catholic Church wedding and their evening reception? Is this the panacea brides embrace to justify a dead 2 - 6 hours on their wedding day (and to be fair, I don't care if the reception is about an hour away from the church. That doesn't qualify as "a gap")? Really? If "nobody will die" is the standard, then I guess I can understand leaving your wedding guests to sit in a bar (after which, they'll go to another bar called "cocktail hour"), leaving them to buy slushies and pie (Yay, my seven year old grandson and I do that a few times a week -- minus the pie -- at the local 7 - 11. It eats up all of eight minutes), freshening up for two hours (how fresh can you be?), taking a nap (why would I be tired in the middle of the day?), exploring the town/city in wedding attire (I didn't attend your wedding because Anywhere, USA is on my bucket list of places to explore, especially when he's in a suit and I'm wearing cocktail attire, and unless your town is home to Aztec ruins, I can assume I've seen it before), or playing lawn games (please...). Lawn games? Sure, who doesn't love the idea of a wedding turning into an abbreviated back yard BBQ (without the food and summer attire) and then turning back into a wedding because Bocce BalI, Bean Bag Toss, or Giant Jenga is on stage for a few hours? Besides the boredom, does anyone not realize that most people expect to invest about six or seven hours at a wedding? Since when did it become acceptable to ask guests to invest 10 or 12 hours for your wedding -- not counting travel time?

As a Catholic, I do have issues with the church, but I'd be embarrassed to speak to a priest and say that "wedding gaps" are one of my issues. He would know, just as I know (and the rest of the guests know) that "The Gap" isn't a new sacrament, but rather, a choice. A choice. A choice. A choice.

I come from a huge Irish Catholic family. To say that the Catholic Church is a fixture in the lives of my family members would be a fair statement. However, in 40 years of attending Catholic weddings, I have been invited to exactly ONE wedding with a gap. One. I skipped the ceremony and attended the reception, as did 200 of the 300 guests who were invited (and the MOG, my family member, not only understood, but she was embarrassed by the fact that the couple chose a gap). I was at the cocktail hour of that wedding, and I watched as those who did attend the ceremony and showed up, four hours later, at the reception. They were hot, tired, fading, had already eaten, and had had a few drinks at a local bar. They weren't ready to party, but they were willing to invest two more hours and then start the long journey home...which they did. The other family members who've had Catholic weddings and wanted evening receptions were married in the late afternoon on a Friday or they were married on Saturday evening, at the venue, with a representative of the church conducting the ceremony. No gap.

Your guests do not like gaps -- and let's be honest, who would? They tolerate them, and I wouldn't be happy with guests who had to tolerate anything about my wedding. So, I have a simple solution -- if you have a gap, I'm not attending your ceremony. I'll be at home doing what I do on a Saturday, and about 4:00 PM, I'll start the process of getting ready to attend a party -- not a "free dinner and booze" party, but a party that costs quite a bit to attend.

Have a gap? Fine; I'll hate missing the pageantry and beauty of the ceremony, but I will. Just don't judge those of us who pass on the gap and we won't judge you for asking your guests to endure one. Fair enough.

Honestly, I'd rather have planned or suggested activities than a cocktail "hour" that lasts 2 because they couldn't get pictures done in a timely manner. At least, if tour guest are aware of a gap, they can plan accordingly...

Honestly, when I get an invite and see a gap, I sigh a little, but on the day of, it's always perfectly fine!! No need to stress. And your guests are adults; they can figure out how to fill time. You could put on website, but I wouldn't put in program

@Rachel--I see you're very passionate about gaps! Planning has been smooth for us. No drama with BMs or MOG wearing white or any angst at all really. This was our first issue. I have been to several Catholic weddings throughout my life and about 50% have had gaps and the others went directly to the cocktail hour.

I think most guests are considerate enough not to think about what is "owed" to them on someone else's wedding day. Guests aren't as selfish as everyone tends to think. Whenever I'm a guest at a wedding, and I know my friends share the same thoughts, I am so happy that the couple thought to invite me to one of the biggest days of their lives and to witness them entering a sacrament that will hopefully bring them much joy and help them grow in virtue.

Also, the way everyone here does things is not the only way. A PP mentioned in Vietnamese weddings, there's a gap that is standard. I myself am Bolivian, and half of my guests will be too. I know there are always gaps as ceremonies tend to happen in the morning, everyone then goes home, and then gets back together for dinner and to party until the wee hours of the following morning.

The brides here simply do not know all. Everything in these threads is an opinion. It's so annoying to read the posts by people who over generalize and who write long answers to simple questions as if they are fact. You don't know everyone, and you don't know everything.

I also stand by the PP who said they'd do lawn games. Do what you want to do! It's a frikken transition period, not a lifetime commitment to cornhole.

Most of the PPs in this thread have been helpful in posting a simple answer to a simple question, on either side of the equation. I can't help but roll my eyes though when I see such a long post yelling at everyone else for their own opinions. Get over yourself.

"Nobody will die" is a pretty low bar to judge a wedding's success.

If you can't move the ceremony, move the reception up. If you can't do that (and doubtless, OP can't), you move the reception to a place that can accommodate you. I have plenty of venues that do their afternoon/evening weddings starting at 3:00 or 4:00.

I'd skip the ceremony, and as you might imagine, I love the ceremonies. But I'm not spending 12 hours at and not at your wedding.