I have a very generous set of future in-laws. They have always supported our relationship and been generous and welcoming as long as I know them, it’s just how they are. They’ve also helped us with about a quarter to a third of our wedding costs, which is also super nice, but was never necessary.
I enjoy carefully selecting details for our wedding, just like I do in my personal life with fashion and decor. Detail is important to me and I take pride in curating a cohesive and delightful experience for our guests.
My issue is this. My FMIL bought us a cake cutting set with champagne flutes, a guestbook, and a big birdcage for our guest’s cards. I had already picked out a guestbook that matched the rest of our wedding. The guestbook she gave us is cheapy looking and gaudy - white satin with a thick strip of round rhinestones. The birdcage for guest cards is not something I would have ever bought, it’s also of poor quality and definitely does not match our decor. She thinks she knows what would look good at our venue because she has been there many times. We’ll use the champagne glasses and cake cutting set because they are personalized and of decent quality, although also not what I would have selected.
I just think she is overstepping, no one should be buying decor items for someone else’s wedding. Yes generous, yes most guests won’t care about the gaudy birdcage with our names in Curlz font, but I do. FH is very supportive of me, and has said we don’t have to use any of it and that I can push back at his mom. Or that he would talk to her. Especially when she said the guestbook matched my dress while my FH sat next to me! WHEN IT DOESN’T, MY GOD. Ready to rip my hair out because this is all under the guise of “being nice!” What would you do?