Going to lose it--parents inviting people behind my back

I agree with the others - you should tell her that final numbers went to the caterer with the list *you* have, so she's going to have to tell her friends that she screwed up and shouldn't have invited them (easier said than done, I know).

Agree with the others. This is your wedding, tell her she needs to cancel them all, you did not invite them or authorize her to. You are not in the wrong here, she went way over the line inviting them.

Talk to parents and set boundaries.

I'm so sorry this happen to you! I agree with everyone else, with telling them you already gave the caterers the final numbers. Also let your parents know that is your wedding, not there's. They can't just be inviting who ever they want without telling you. And maybe give a list of people you invited to your wedding planner and tell them if anyone that isn't on this list kick them out. I know that can be mean but you didn't invite them.

This is one of those times when "NO" is a complete sentence.

"No, this is the final list."

"But we invited people!"

"No."

Agreed with all others... tell mom she gets the pleasure of calling all of those she invited without your approval and informing them that she overstepped and they are not actually welcome.

Not only is there no way to gracefully handle dealing with your FMIL over this, but it was flat out disrespectful of your mother to do that, and she needs to be put in her place and eat crow.

Agreed with the others and so sorry this is happening to you!

I'm sorry you're having to deal with it but ... unfortunately,this is what happens when parents are paying or contributing a high percentage.

95 times out of 100 , money from parents comes with strings attached, especially when it comes to the guest list.

I KNOW you're talking about the fact of inviting them behind your back but this is the same.

I'm afraid there's nothing you can do since your dad is footing the whole bill.

Oof that's rough. Yea, the others have it right. I'm sure your mom will put up a stink about it, especially if you've already agreed to her changes in that moment.

However, call her now, and tell her you felt pressured to give in in that moment, but that she's added a ton of stress to you and she needs to call her friends that she invited because the caterer can't add on the extras and you're not about to strain your relationship with FMIL even further just so your mom can have her friends come to your wedding. Emphasis on your wedding.

The audacity here is just astounding.