Groomswomen, help!

Hi Trinity! I think this is totally up to you! I'd decide first what she'll be wearing, and you may want to ask her about that. Maybe she'd be more comfortable matching the BMs and maybe she'd rather find another option. You, your fiancé, and her can talk about it. If she's matching the BMs, and you want her to have her hair/makeup to match too, then you need to pay for it. If it's optional, you don't have to, but if you require it, you need to (same as the rule of thumb with BMs). And again, I'd ask her about getting ready. If she doesn't know you/the BMs well, she may be uncomfy getting ready with the girls, but being alone and joining the guys later could also be awkward, so I'd just ask her.

For our wedding, we had a groomswoman (husband's friend) and bride's man (my brother). The groomswoman got ready with us because I hired a professional makeup artist and hair stylist and she wanted her hair done so logistically it made sense for her to get ready with us. I only paid for my hair and makeup and the flower girls. Everyone else paid for their own since it was optional. The groomswoman wore the same dress as the bridesmaids and the bride's man wore the same tux as the groomsmen. I had wanted the groomswoman to wear the same dress in black to match the groomsmen's tuxes, but my husband veteod that idea. He thought it would look like a funeral. He also pointed out that I wasn't making the bride's man wear a red suit to match the bridesmaids. The groomswoman went shopping for dresses when I went with my bridesmaids. There are honestly several different options for what a groomswoman can wear. They make suits for women, she can wear the same dress as the bridesmaids, or she can wear a dress that is the same color as what the groomsmen wear. Once your fiance asks her to be in the wedding, I would reach out to reach to see what she would prefer to wear. I would also see if she is going to want her hair and makeup done. I've posted photos to give you an idea. The first three photos are from my wedding. The others I found online.

Totally up to you! I have friends who got married last year... the bride and groom each have 2 sisters, plus other friends of course. The groom’s sisters were groomswomen, but they are close with the bride as well so they all got ready together. They wore the same dress as the bridesmaids, but in a different color (bridesmaids wore pink dresses, groomsmen wore navy suits, and groomswomen wore navy dresses). I think it’s nice to have her get ready with you but only if she’s someone you’re close with as well.

I think it would be nice to actually offer the groomswoman that - see if she wants to get ready with you guys

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Great tips! I will ask her, but I am not very closed with her. Thank you!

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This is sooooooooo helpful! Thank you so much for sharing! My concern is also budget since we will be covering the hair for the BMs, and I will buy the get ready robes for the girls too. I will talk to my fiance and talk to her. It's hard to have 4 people on my side, and only 3 on his as well.

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Ok, thank you! I will ask her.

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I would only cover hair and makeup if you are requiring it be done by a professional. I wouldn't pay for anyone's hair and makeup if it is optional. I bought getting ready robes from Etsy. They are way more expensive than I initially realized, but the seller was amazing. I got robes for myself, mom, flower girls, bridesmaids, and groomswoman. She made a custom listing so I could purchase all of the robes under one listing. She has pre-set listings of 1 or 5 robes, but if you need a different number of robes all you have to do is message her and she will create a custom listing. I have linked her page below. Also, uneven wedding parties are very common so I wouldn't worry about that.

https://www.etsy.com/shop/HandmadeChicCrafts?ref=simple-shop-header-name&listing_id=634856875

An option would be a similar color or different /lighter/darker shade of you’re bridesmaids. I would ask her if she wanted to be included hair and makeup.

My FH has 2 groomsladies as well. We asked them first what they would be comfortable wearing. It was going to be between suits to match the guys or dresses similar to bridesmaids. They were open to either option but really wanted to wear suits. I’m excited for it! I think it will look really cool. We are having all the grooms people buy from thegroomsmansuit.com. They have women’s styles designed to match the colors of the men’s styles. The women’s suits are really cute and they are obviously made for a woman’s body. As for getting ready, I’m not sure what we will do. They will most likely get ready with the guys. I will offer for them to get hair and makeup with us if they want, but I’m guessing they won’t.

I had two bridesmen on my side, and hubby had a groomswoman on his! She got ready with the rest of us girls, and my bridesmen got ready with hubby. As far as attire, I put our groomswoman in the same color but a slightly different style. With the guys, I just had them wear a dark green shirt (since the groomsmen were wearing dark green ties).

Also, totally irrelevant information, but too exciting not to share: the groomswoman and one of my bridesmen were actually dating at the time and are now married themselves!

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Thank you! I talked to her and we figured it out. Now, I am concerned about the gifts and hair, etc. part. I am paying for my girls' hair and giving them gifts, and buying the robes for them to wear. If the groomswoman is not going to get ready with me, should I still get her a robe or that's pointless?

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Thank you for sharing! That's super adorable. Congratulations to you and your friends as well!

As far as the groomswoman, I don't really know her that well, so it's better for us to get ready with guys. Also, my fiance will only have 2 guys with him if she doesn't get ready with them. Did you get the same gifts for the groomswoman as the other girls? I want to get my girls bridal robes so we can take pictures with it, but if the GW is not getting ready with us, should I still get her one? Also, trying to watch our budget. Thank you!

View Quoted Comment I feel like that’s not necessary, especially if your fh is getting his own gifts for his groomspeople. If you really wanted to though, it wouldn’t hurt

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Thank you!

We did get her the same gift as my bridesmaids, but since we didn't do getting ready pictures, we got them necklaces, and all the guys (including my two) got pocket watches. She should definitely get a gift, but it doesn't necessarily have to be a robe, since as you said, she's not getting ready with you. And if a cute photo op is the only reason for the robes, it really doesn't seem necessary. Since your FH knows her better than you, I think he should be the one to pick out and get her gift.