Guest Attendance

Are you concerned because your venue and/or caterer requires paying for a minimum number?

Other than that, stuff like this happens all the time. You should always plan for the maximum number of people invited - you can always scale down. I'm not sure where you're getting married, but in a lot of places, 222 guests this October could be anxiety-producing with the pandemic. If you get less RSVPs, it's fine, you just give your headcount when it's due.

This is definitely a year where you could see a lot more declines than a non-Covid-times wedding, but definitely plan for 222.

While it is unlikely that all 222 will attend, you should absolutely be budgeting for 100% attendance. It does happen, and it is much easier to cut centerpieces, plates, etc. if you have declines than it is to try to add money later.

Is your mom only hoping/willing to pay for 150 guests? That part was a little unclear to me. I would absolutely make sure you plan/have the budget for all invited guests, just in case! I definitely don’t think all 222 guests would be a yes, but you can’t guarantee an exact 72 would be a no either.


I would err on that side of caution and budget/plan for the invited amount.

Always prepare for 100% attendance because it does happen more often than you realize. Also never invite more than you can afford to host properly and how many your venue will hold with any restrictions in place.

I agree - definitely plan for 100% attendance! In my experience organising large events (but not weddings) you generally get 70-90% attendance, but you always plan for 100 just in case.

Assuming covid isn't overly a concern, and there are no other mitigating factors (ie, it's on a holiday weekend or a long way away from most of your guests, etc etc) I think your mum's estimate is low - 150 is 67%. I'd expect closer to 175-190.

My auntie-in-law told me at her daughter's wedding, they had 100% attendance, so it can happen! (my fiance's family are definitely the 'show up, with bells on' type!) That said, I know for us, we have at least 5 of our 120 guests living overseas and they definitely won't be able to make it so we're likely to have closer to 90-95% of our guests, so I'd say to go with your gut on this one - plus as the others say, always better to over-plan than under plan.

Never invite more than you're able to host! You could end up with almost full attendance, or someone may even bring an uninvited guest, so you'll have more than you think. Have you already sent invitations to 222 people? If you haven't, I would definitely wait until later in the summer and try to downsize to what you can actually afford

A lot of this really depends on your guests and whether they’re local and have close relationships to you, but I would never plan for a 30% decline rate. Even the destination weddings I’ve attended have only had about that and those had no local guests. If your mom is only willing to pay for 150 and you and your FS can’t afford the difference, I would cut your list to 150.

If you invite 222 you have to plan for 222. Most of your vendors ask for your guest count up front, and then a final count a month or so before the wedding. We only had 13 people decline, so the whole "25% of people don't come" saying is false. Plan for the number you invite so you don't put yourself in a very stressful situation last minute.

We are in a similar predicament - how many did you end up having?