Guest List Woes

My friends had to downsize their wedding to only 50 because of COVID restrictions. They limited it to the bridal party and immediate family. You could also do an adults only wedding, not sure if it works in your situation but it is an option!

Also, I learned this when getting our guest list together. Family members are going to expect you to invite everyone regardless of how long it's been since you've spoken to them or seen them. My mom wanted us to invite people that last saw me when I was a toddler lol. I just politely told her that we aren't exceeding 200 on the guest list, and we're prioritizing people. Our way of seeing it is: if we haven't spoken or seen the person in the past year or if they haven't attempted at keeping a relationship with us, then they aren't invited.

View Quoted Comment Thanks for your thoughts. I like your thinking!

You and your fiance decide on the guest list. No one else gives input.

View Quoted Comment

You're welcome! Good luck with the rest of your planning!

Just tell her no means no. You can try to explain all this but if she still doesnt get it just make sure you are in charge of invitations and dont send one to those people. Especially if your parents are paying and it sounds like you have a valid reason to want to keep it small since your dad is immune compromised.

Ultimately, the guest list is a decision that should be made between the bride and the groom. If y'all want to invite some of his family, go for it. Other than that, tell her you guys want to keep the guest list limited because of covid, your father, financial or venue restrictions, etc. After all, she isn't the one helping with the costs, your parents are.
For my wedding I'm doing no children and no plus ones. Certain people got plus ones because I wanted everyone to atleast know someone there. Other than that, many couples were invited together. These are people that attend our church, our closest friends and family, and people that have supported this relationship.
We have heard alot of people complaining behind our back about not getting an invitation or not getting a plus one, but these people don't ever talk to us. At the end of the day, my fiance and I decided to put more money into the things we wanted and not into the guest list. Hope this helps!