Guests and plus one help!

Since your wedding is soon I’m guessing he already knows he was getting a plus one? I think that especially since he’s performing a service for you, he should be able to bring someone. When you extend a plus one option, you’re giving the person a choice of who to bring. One of my BMs asked if she could bring a friend of hers since she’s currently single and I said of course which I would have said anyway but especially because she’s an honored guest. I think the right thing to do would be to allow him the plus one IMHO

1) He's one of your best friends 2) He's your officiant (this is a separate issue but I'll skip it) 3) He's traveling to be with you. 4) You've already budgeted a plus one for him

Let him bring a guest - whoever he wants.

I don't get everyone who posts about not including the dates of guests they haven't met. My friends and family are spread all over the US and a few internationally. I certainly haven't met all of their SOs. Does that mean I should be incredibly rude and say, "we don't want randos and since we haven't met your SO, he/she is a rando and is not invited?"

We wanted our guests to be happy and comfortable and not including their SOs was never a thought. Not including their dates was never a thought.

Not giving someone who is flying in to your wedding, performing the ceremony, paying for his stay/flight (if he is) and then saying he doesn't get to bring a guest is so very inconsiderate. Let him bring a friend.

I get not wanting random people at your wedding, but keep in mind that this guest is coming across the country by himself to attend. I know if I was going that far for a wedding I'd want to choose for myself who I get to travel with. If you wanted his sister sthere, you could have invited them separately.

I would extend your officiant a plus one of their choosing. They are traveling a long way to attend your wedding, and maybe they don't want to travel alone. I am coming from a very biased position since I gave everyone over the age of 18 a plus one. Before I met my FH I wasn't extended a plus one to some weddings, and for me they just weren't as fun. I went to one where I was basically a third wheel with my friend and her then fiance. I awkwardly shuffled off the dance floor for every slow song. I wanted my guests to be comfortable and have so much fun. If that means meeting a few people on the day of my wedding then that was okay with my FH and myself.

Honestly if someone was so picky about who o brought to their wedding after already giving me a plus one and I was traveling far, I would probably decline to come.

I agree that he should be able to bring a friend because you’ve already extended the invite and he’s doing something for your wedding. Try not to worry about the friend “intruding” on the other events, most likely you’ll barely notice them.

Also, friendly reminder that it’s not just ladies/brides on here

He's one of your best friends, and he's travelling across the country, and your guest list already included his girlfriend so there is space available. It's a no-brainer. If this friend doesn't feel comfortable attending all your events, they don't have to.

I agree with all other PP. Let him bring his friend.

This person is one of your best friends, he's officiating your wedding, he's flying across the country for you, you already have a spot reserved for a plus one for him. Please let him bring whomever he chooses. I think we all end up with a few plus ones at our weddings that we don't know. I wouldn't worry about it and certainly not in this particular situation given what i listed above.

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Thanks J'Neil and MOST of you for the friendly advice

We gave plus ones to anyone traveling a significant distance as we wouldn't want them to have to travel alone or be at our event without someone... we didn't give plus ones to family members that are within driving distance and who will know most of the guests... we did give plus ones to friends who will know hardly anyone there because we didn't want them to leave right away lol everyone does it differently though!

Thanks, Brittany! That's pretty much exactly the same guidelines we are following as well!

That's not exactly how plus ones work though - referring to Brittany's comment. If I was a family member and you didn't extend my SO an invite because I'm within driving distance, I would decline altogether.

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Mrs. Mitch, I think it's a case by case basis. If I just started dating someone and a family member invited me to their wedding and didn't extend an invite to my newly SO, I would still go especially if I'm within driving distance. I'm there to celebrate the bride and groom, not make their wedding a date night for my SO and I. I feel that would be extremely selfish on my part to decline going altogether because they didn't invite my new boyfriend, I certainly can give up one night of my life without the boyfriend to celebrate a happy occasion. And plus since I'm family I would have other family there to spend my time with.

It would be tacky to take away his plus one which he probably already knew he was getting especially since he's providing a service at the wedding. Personally all of our good friends got plus ones even if they want to bring a new date or a friend.

View Quoted Comment Yes! I agree.

He is your officent and your wedding is 3 days long. Plus he is traveling out of town. I would be pretty upset if it was all that and I could not bring a plus one. I get it is your big day, but don’t forget that others are making a sacrifice to be there for you.