Guests Have Decided to Go Vegan and I Don't Have Food For Them

I would challenge the caterer, email them telling them you intend to utilize an outside provider to accommodate your guests- since they are unable/unwilling to accommodate your guests needs. I bet they will figure something out....

I would probably be annoyed. When I hired our caterer, I specifically asked about the food restrictions I knew about (vegetarian and celiac). If I dont know, I cant plan. I would still make every effort (short of hiring a new caterer) to accomodate for them but I would be totally irked.

Probably an UO but I don't think that you need to bend over backwards for a dietary change that is so recent they actually made a different meal choice on the RSVP. If it were because of a newly discovered allergy I would understand, but I would think that they can eat a vegetarian meal one more time instead of making you find another restaurant to provide a meal.

I think having another conversation with your caterer is necessary, and I bet they could figure out some sort of vegan option. If not, tell them you're getting food from a restaurant and they will still serve it. I think the whole situation is very annoying, and a month out from my wedding there'd be no way I would be finding a new caterer

ETA I agree with rosared

How strictly vegan are your guests if they were eating meat when they RSVP'ed? Maybe your caterer is just being overly cautious about the butter because if they are told "vegan" they are going to adhere to a very strict vegan menu. See if there is some flexibility on both sides. A friend of ours went vegan a month before our wedding and our caterer was able to come up with a roasted veggie dish. He still ate the salad and waffles with berries and wasn't overly picky if the waffle batter was made with eggs.

I have an incredibly strict diet for medical reasons and have never/will never expect another person to accommodate me, with the exception of FH. I bring food with me everywhere, even to family holidays. I see what you mean about the fact that the caterer was upfront about not serving vegans, my venue is the same way. If they cannot GUARANTEE it, they won't do it, I would assume this is for liability reasons.

Like everyone else said... bring them in a meal from a restaurant and then let that be the end of it. Have it be the same quality and don't make it much different than the vegetarian risotto.

Deciding to go vegan a few weeks before a wedding and expecting to be accommodated is insane.

Personally I'm a picky eater but I just don't eat much or bring a snack if I don't think I'll enjoy the options offered. It would never occur to me to tell someone hosting a large event that I have preferences for something that will be the same as, at most, 2% of the total guests, and expect to be accommodated.

Just by being willing to bring in something for them you are going above and beyond in my book. It's one thing if you knew they were vegan ahead of time and therefore should have planned for it, but for them to decide this late and expect you to work around that is extremely rude.

Am I the only person who feels this couple is rude? like no you can't change your mind after you already sent in the RSVP like sorry you're out of luck. Don't come or bring your own food.

They've been eating meat this long; they can eat it for one more meal on December 23rd. Or not. January 1st sounds like a fabulous time to begin the all-vegan lifestyle. This isn't your caterer's fault nor is it yours. Some caterers don't do vegan. That's their business model and their choice, just like the ones who serve all vegetarian or all vegan and refuse to serve meat products.

It's insane that people are telling you to get a new caterer one month from your wedding. Those guests should be embarrassed about saying something after RSVPs have been sent. If it were me, I would go out of my way to have some vegan food delivered just for them and never let them live it down til the end of time.

Ask your caterer if they would be able to give them a double portion of the salad, or the other option would be to have vegan food delivered to your venue. You have to make sure that they allow for outside foods.

Sorry but I think it's rude of your guests to expect you to accommodate their change in menu request this late in the game. They RSVP'd chicken....I think it's very entitled of them to expect you be able to make a large change like that. There are a lot of things to do last minute before a wedding, it's rude of them to put you on this position!

Honestly, your guests sound like a real pain in the ass. OP, i would be extremely aggravated too if I had to worry about this a month before my wedding because they just decided to make a lifestyle change. I'm also less than 2 weeks away and EVERYONE is on my last nerve so maybe I'm a little irrational right now I guess just try and bring in a couple dishes for them from an outside restaurant.

ETA: yeeeahhh no I've thought it over and I'm not being irrational...this couple is entitled and rude as hell.

I'm really surprised at your caterer. It's not hard to cook two portions of something in oil instead of butter and leave the cheese out. What are your starters and sides?

Ours was very accommodating at making sure we had 1 gluten free meal, 1 vegetarian and ordering 2 kosher from another caterer.

Op, you're not in the wrong. It's ridiculous that people are even suggesting finding a completely different caterer because two weeks out two guests, who originally rsvpd for the chicken, now decided they were full fledged vegans. I'd be tempted to tell them that while they don't have to eat the chicken, the caterer I chose is not a vegan caterer. They can choose the vegetarian meal or opt to stay at home. In reality, I would just pick up a separate meal for them and call it a day. ETA: I'd watch them like a hawk during cocktail hour. If i even saw them pick up one cheese cube I'd be over asking them how that vegan lifestyle was going.

It is not her fault or the Carteres fault! When she booked them she didn't have Vegan guests! How would she know they would change ? I would be honest with the guests that they can have Vegetarian options but at this point since everything is booked already you can't accommodate Vegan.

Honestly, I would tell them that you've discussed with your caterer and that's something that they cannot provide. You could ask your caterer if you can bring something for them and ask them to keep it warm, since they cannot provide a meal for them... talk to your guests and see what they would like. It doesn't seem like you have any other options besides (1) not feeding them or (2) bringing something special for them.

ETA: DONT shop for a new caterer. That's absolutely ridiculous.

Your friends sound annoying, I agree with K squared, just keep your caterer and tell your friends that at this late of notice all you can do is try to buy a meal for them somewhere else. I have a sister in law with severe allergies like pretty much can't eat anything unless they totally clean the kitchen and start from scratch with no flour, tree-nuts, coconut oil, olive oil, yeast, regular nuts, etc etc she's allergic to everything and she brings her own meals everywhere she never asks people to accommodate her because she knows it's a pain, I think your vegan friends need to understand that vegan isn't easy to accommodate I've been to 10 weddings in the past 2 years and none of them had a vegan option lol

I'm surprised this went for 8 pages. I'm sure if OP knew she needed vegan meals, she would've found a caterer to accommodate. We need gluten free meals and nut free meals, so every caterer we asked for gluten free or nut free. Those who couldn't accommodate, didn't get hired. If someone came to me 6 weeks before my wedding and said hey I'm vegan now, to be TRULY vegan can so hard to accommodate if you are not familiar or don't have the resources. I'd be happy ordering them a meal from a vegan restaurant. As a person who just doesn't eat most things, I never expect anyone to make something specifically for me. I know what I can and will eat, and if it's not available I just get something later in the evening.

I think OP is fine not challenging her caterer, I wouldn't either.

If you're serving a salad just ask for the dressings and cheeses to be held off of the salad so people can choose whether to add. I'm vegan and I never request that at weddings... I usually just feed myself ahead of time and plan on snacking on veggies or fruit when there. I think your guests are being pretty unreasonable honestly to be changing their meal option when they already knew what your options were... if you are in an area where there is noodles and company, there are quite a few options there. You could have someone pick up a couple boxes to-go.