Has anyone else wanted to call off the wedding and just elope?

Raises both hands in the air!!!!

Welcome to my world. I get, "OMG THEY ARE ALL MAKING ME CRAZY CAN WE GET MARRIED NEXT WEEK?" calls every single day.

Daily.

The reception generally lasts 4 -5 hours, not the whole wedding (unless that's the way you want it). Listen, you're in the homestretch. You've taken care of the big stuff. As far as the DJ goes, it sounds like the two of you are having a problem agreeing on what type of music or atmosphere you want. Is there any room to meet in the middle -- a compromise? There are lots of good DJs. When you meet with them, ask how long they've been in business, how many weddings do they do in a year -- that kind of thing. Many of them will even post videos on their websites of themselves working other weddings. That will give you a good idea of a Djs ability to keep the party going.

As far as the alcohol goes, are you okay with FH's decision to cut it? Would you enjoy a cocktail or a glass of wine at your wedding? If so, tell him. Lastly, your wedding will be wonderful because it's your wedding. I've been to all kinds of weddings -- big and small. They are each unique and as long as people aren't hungry and can hear themselves think (it's a pet peeve of mine when the music is so painfully loud that conversation is impossible and the table is vibrating), they will enjoy themselves. You aren't Sally. You're you. No more comparisons -- they're not fair to you.

Yeah, i'm getting pretty close to throwing in the towel and running away with FH! dealing with everyone else's opinions gets really tiring, really quickly.

if a wedding is what you want, you'll find a way to make it work, and it will be beautiful and unique, just like you and your man!

I originally wanted to elope but FH wanted to have an actual wedding.

I was ready to call the whole thing off last month because we got into a huge blow out over his sister & my shower (long story).

I'm so glad you posted this- I've been feeling this way ever since we decided not to have the big backyard wedding. It's the worst. Trying to find a venue now that we like, and there are about 7 other weddings right around the time we had wanted to have ours which is prompting us to change the date as well. Blah!

Hi,

We've thought about it because weddings are expensive. We are having our reception with a DJ from 2-6pm. We also aren't having alcohol. My advice--focus on what's important to you as a couple. DON'T compare yourself to ANYONE else's wedding. Wedding's are meant to be personal and represent the couple. You guys should do what makes you happy/comfortable.

I don't think you're alone. I've been officiating weddings since 2002 and over the past 3 years, I've seen a huge increase in elopements--both from couples who planned to elope all along and from those who bailed on planning their big wedding halfway (or further!) through the process.

I find it interesting, reading this post and talking to our couples, how often it's the guy who actually wants the big wedding. Watching how couples' desires change with time is always fascinating.

Bottom line is that you have to do what works for you.

This gives me an idea. I'm writing a blog post on "things people say that make couples want to elope." If you have any gems, then send 'em to me! (*******@**********.***)

You preaching to the choir-I even put my FH out of my wedding in a joking way-We have a schedule we talk about the wedding on Tuesday Thursday and Saturday. This way we are not consumed by the wedding.

We didn't quite do that, but we did scale it down drastically. We went from the whole shebang(sp?) and 180 people in a church and full-on reception hall, etc. down to a private ceremony on a mountain overlooking the city with a casual BBQ reception @ a park pavilion a month after the ceremony. There is still SOME stress involved, but I couldn't be more relieved!! We initially made the change because of finances. We want to buy a home. If we went ahead with the plans for the big wedding, we were going to DRAIN out entire savings and not even get a honeymoon out of it. Then we'd be starting over. Boo. We did lose out on a $500 deposit for the DJ, but oh well.

Eloping was our original plan. We wanted to take a trip to Bali and get married just the two of us in this beautiful place, we are both introverts. Then a close friend of my moms daughter got eloped and my mom was saying how devastated she would be if she couldn't be there for my big day and me being an only child I kind of felt too guilty to go through with it. I'm happy with how my wedding will be now and I don't have any regrets and maybe 10 years from now we can still take our bali trip and renew our vows.

@shelby I agree

Y'all have made me feel so much better! I knew I wasn't the only one, but I had no idea there were this many!

Every. Single. Day. ... but then I always seem to realize I like being alive and not in fear of death by family.

FMS, if you ever need to talk, you have my insta and we can exchange info. I know it gets rough, but it'll all work out!

Enjoy a night with your man with no wedding planning Everything will turn out perfectly!

Thank you Emma and FMW! I will keep y'all in mind when I need a moment to vent!