Has anyone’s groom demoted their best man?

My fiance took changed all his groomsman and best man because of a fight/drama. It happens if they dont wanna help then they shouldn't be in it. I know my family/friends don't have money but they still help when they can with diy decor and what not.

I've come to understand that the bridal party is only "required" to pay for their clothes & to show up on the day of. Considering the best man is your FH's brother I would suggest you try to calm your FH down a little. Assuming the same rules apply for bachelor parties as bachelorette, I'm gonna say it is not required for anyone to either throw or pay for the party. If it's that important to your FH he should offer to cover the costs for his brother. I was MOH for my sisters wedding & was "demoted" for not being able to contribute financially to the parties as the other girls. It still hurts me. I strongly suggest against the demotion.

If your FI always helps him then he must know he doesn’t have any money. You guys or mom should pay for the suit and call it good. For the bachelor party, oh well hopefully someone else will step up as the BM doesn’t have to plan it. Anyone who offers can plan it. Sounds like a lot of stress is on this guys shoulders, start with the suit and make that the priority. I wouldn’t demote a family member (or anyone) if you have the means to get him the suit. If not your FI can chat with his Mom again to see if she can help, if she can’t then I guess he’s just a guest.

My niece is my maid of honor. She had no money to throw a party. I don't care about that, i asked her to stand with me bc i couldn't imagine her not standing with me. FH's brother is not working, so we helped him get outfitted. I don't think whether or not they can host expensive parties should be the criteria for having them be in your wedding.

My husband wanted his best friend from 6th grade to be his best man, but he was sent to prison in march. hes a great guy but... really irresponsible and him as best man made me kind of nervous, so him going to prison made it easier to remove him from the wedding party and he picked another one of his really close friends. all in all it went well!

Agreed with Amber, you should try to calm your FH down and not turn this into an even bigger deal. Don't be selfish and worry about where blame is going to be placed, and don't demote someone over money. That's not fair at all. I would never expect my maid of honor to throw me a big party or buy an expensive dress no matter her financial situation. If a member of the bridal party can't contribute, let it go and help them get suited. Otherwise they aren't that important to you. "20 dollars" may not seem like anything to you but for some people in life there is literally no wiggle room in budget.

Good luck and I hope you figure it out

The reason my FH is so upset is his younger brother lacks drive, respect and enjoys illegal consuming things. My FH believes a year should have been enough time to save money however reality is the brother doesn’t want to do it. I told my FH the day is special to the two people getting married and to no one else so let’s not have a fight and just change to his father who will have his suit and forget about the party. He’s not happy because he feels he’s a good friend and brother to everyone else and when it’s his time no one does anything for him. I told stop doing for everyone and do for him. Enjoy life.

View Quoted Comment But it doesn’t sound like this is new behavior for his brother. People don’t change just because you’re getting married and you want them to.

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This is going to sounds harsh, but I think your FH set himself up for failure on this one. He knew all of this about his brother, but he still chose him to be the best man and expected him to throw and pay for a bachelor party? You help your loved ones because you love them, not because you thing they will help you in return. If he demotes his brother, that could harm their relationship for years to come. Hopefully his groomsmen can throw him a bachelor party, but honestly, it's just a party.