Have you enjoyed being a bridesmaid?

I was a bridesmaid once, last year, and loved it. I did have to spend some money on the dress and a hotel room, but it was worth it to me. It was a small COVID wedding (30 people) and there was just one other bridesmaid. The vibe was very chill. We arrived at the venue early in the morning, so I got several hours of quality time with my best friend and her family. I know brides are busy, so if I had been a regular guest, I probably wouldn't have gotten so much bonding time and photos with her.

I have been a junior bridesmaid before it was enjoyable but I think it might have been more fun as an adult bridesmaid. Only because I would have been able to enjoy hanging out with the bride and going to the bachelorette party. However, from that experience, I preferred to be a guest. I didn't like my dress as jr bridesmaid (didn't get the chance to help pick), I loved that as a guest I didn't have to stand the whole ceremony and I loved not having to be on a timeline. If a friend asked me to be a bridesmaid I would, but I wouldn't be mad I wasn't asked.

I have been a bridesmaid 7 times. The first one was......bad......the mother of the bride offered to make the brides dress as well as all of ours then ran out of time (and made comments about peoples waist measurements) All the guests ate while we were having pictures taken and then insisted on the cake being cut before we could eat anything. And for our makeup she scheduled us to have the free make overs at the mall so none of it looked good. Her sisters wasnt much better and she required me to buy a dress that was twice my budget even though I had talked to her privately about my budget. Most of the other weddings were good with only minor hiccups.

I've been a bridesmaid three times, almost 4, and I never really enjoyed it. Especially bachelorette planning because it's not your friend who's planning it, it's her sister who takes no account of what people *can* spend and plans a minute-by-minute itinerary in your state's most expensive city for the weekend.


One of those three times I was maid of honor which was a nightmare because I'm more of a "spontaneous adventure" type person instead of a planner and my friend's (bride) only input was "I'm up for whatever!". Like no, please, I need a direction to go in. It turned out a good day and we all had fun, but I hated that anxiety leading up to it.
The time I was almost a bridesmaid, I was between jobs and had just moved across the state when my friend asked me. I declined and told her I just didn't have the extra money to spend on a dress, bachelorette, and all the travel, but I'd be happy to attend as a guest. She promised me it'd be super low-key, just find a purple dress and come to a bachelorette party at her house, i asked if a purple dress from a previous wedding i was in would suffice and she said absolutely, so I agreed. About a month later she called me that she picked out a wedding dress and that the other girls started looking at bridesmaid dresses and they found this really cute one for "only $215" and to give her a time when I can come up and buy my dress. I had to decline a second time because I just couldn't afford it.
I'm a bridesmaid in my best friend's wedding coming up this September and I've already told myself this is the last time I will ever accept being a bridesmaid for. Already her maid of honor told us we should plan on putting away at least $350 for the bachelorette weekend.
It's just a lot of money to be a bridesmaid, and I've found that so many girls try to get that Social Media Perfect bachelorette party that it's more trouble than fun leading up to anything.
But the wedding day-of is always super fun as a bridesmaid, and I love being able to wear fun bridesmaid dresses seeing as how where I'm from, regular guests will generally wear dressy-casual to a wedding and wearing a floor length gown is generally reserved for the bridal party.

I’ve lost track of how many times I’ve been a bridesmaid at this point. It’s in the mid to upper teens. For the most part, I’ve enjoyed being a BM. Theres been a couple dresses I didn’t like, but not that a big deal. Luckily, my friends tend to be very considerate brides, so no unrealistic expectations or bridezilla behaviors. There’s definitely a trade-off to being a BM vs a guest. Being a guest is easier (wear what you want, just show up to the event and leave when you wish, the only expense is the cash gift, etc.) but being a BM has a lot of fun activities and bonding time that regular guests don’t get to be a part of.

I'm realizing now that both times I've been a bridesmaid it's been MOH... Once for my little sister 5 years ago and then now for my best friend, who is also currently MY MOH. So far I've enjoyed it and only ever had good experiences! I think the only stressful thing was honestly my sister being a bride who wanted to please everyone so when we asked what she wanted from us in terms of help or what to wear/how to look/when she wanted showers it was always "whatever you want, I don't care". And I'm VERRRRRY type A so I needed her to care haha. But otherwise it's always been enjoyable. And so far for my best friend she's had more opinions so it's been easier to plan with her. Might help though that I'm planning my own wedding too so there's a bit more knowledge there.

I've been a bridesmaid/MOH twice. Ive always enjoyed being able to support my dear friends in their wedding planning process and day-of. I also really appreciate that each wedding has shown me things I do and don't like for my own wedding. Things like timeline, food, speeches, how to handle attire, etc. I feel like it's prepared me to go into my wedding knowing pretty much exactly what I want.

I’ve enjoyed it. There are some annoying parts—some parts of some bachelorettes, dresses that are not cute. But overall, I’ve always seen it as a huge honor and really enjoyed the getting ready process especially!

I’ve been a bridesmaid once and loved it! I loved being able to support my friend during such a major event in their lives. There were no negatives for me which could be because she was such a chill bride. Either way, it’s a huge honor and I’d definitely do it again If asked

View Quoted Comment This is a very good point- each wedding I’ve been in has helped me to figure out what I do/do not want for our wedding

I have been a Bridesmaid 13x in cool with never doing it again as it is not something I ever truly enjoyed. I prefer being a guest totally.

Yes and no, I enjoy the actual day and think its so special to stand by your friends during big life moments. But being a bridesmaid can be ridiculously expensive and stressful in the months leading up to it. But overall its worth it to me be there for my nearest and dearest .

I've been a MOH and a BM before and I'll likely be a BM at least three maybe four more times in my life. I enjoy it on the day of, during the events. I don't enjoy the cost or the time commitment overall. I've had to help with projects for both weddings, one of which included a DAY OF diy thing. It was stressful.

For my own wedding, I'm trying to keep as little stress off my BMs as possible, I am letting them choose which dress they want from azazie in the color I chose, choose which shoes they want (in silver), I'm giving them jewelry (i'm buying tons of options off shein and they can each pick from those what they want to wear), I gave them the option to pay for hair/makeup or do it themselves, but I'm honestly probably going to pay for their hair. I'm not asking them to do any projects to help. I'm not even making it a requirement to attend showers or bachelorette. If they can, great, if not, I don't want it to financially ruin them, especially since for most of my bridesmaids they'll have to fly for the wedding.

No. LOL

i feel like everyone thinks it's such an honor because it means the bride thinks you're that close to them to be a part of the day in a larger role but it comes with a lot of responsibility, time, and money.

i mean don't get me wrong i LOVED being a part of my bff's day and i would do so much for her. but the actual role itself was a lot more than people think. for me, my bff was in a different state where the wedding also was. so i had to fly there twice. i was one of the lucky ones where i didn't need lodging or rental car, etc. because i just stayed at her house. otherwise, the other bridesmaids who flew in also had to get their own accommodations and a rental car, etc. and then on top of all the other expenses like the shower, bachelorette, and we had to take additional time off from work since she needed us to come during the week, etc. overall it was a lot more money than people could actually imagine.

I loved being a bridesmaids. I think it’s so much fun helping the bride with their events if they need it. Also just knowing ur important to that bride enough to be apart of a huge life event for them. When my friend was getting married I was her MOH and was able to help her so much as she did me as we were planning weddings together.

I was a bridesmaid for my Matron of Honor in college and I honestly loved it. Since we were all in school it was a relatively low cost burden (a David's Bridal dress that I didn't need to get altered, $20+dinner for her bachelorette weekend with an escape room and sleepover at her house, gas to get to the wedding, free place to stay the night before). There was one other BM I didn't really get along with, but I loved the rest of the girls and we had a great time.

Reading through some of these other responses, I'm glad I'm putting in as much thought as I am to what I'm asking of my friends 😲

I was a BM twice. It was ok if I wasn't an introvert lol. I don't party, drink, smoke, or dress cute. I love staying in and my idea of going out is maybe to a movie then back home lol. Soooo.... with that said:

My BFF's wedding: Luckily I knew another bridesmaid because we were all coworkers at the time. But her other bridesmaids and MOH ... they were nice BUT also young and a bit stand off-ish. The bridal shower and rehearsal were ok. The bachelorette party was horrible, the MOH decided with the bride to go downtown Denver (I hate big cities) and go bar hopping. She told us the dress code was cute dresses and heels. I literally wore an oversize shirt (something that goes over leggings) as a dress because that's all I had and my boots (only heel type shoes I had). My co-worker BM friend also wore a cute top and leggings but the other girls wore literal clubbing dresses (mid drift, cleavage, thighs showing). Don't get me wrong, wear whatever you want BUT all the men there were very interested in these hotties and it made it hard to stay together as a group and just enjoy ourselves. My co worker friend and I ended up babysitting the bride as the other girls went off to dance with the men, and the bride got so drunk and wasted we found out she wasn't wearing any underwear when she toppled over 😂 So we stuck her in the booth and babysat her. Walking in my boots all night sucked, by the end of the night (4am) I was soooo tired from doing nothing but walking (because I'm sober and bored lol). The other BM's and MOH stayed out longer and my co worker friend and I tucked the bride into her hotel room and headed home, out of Denver. We both agreed we wanted to sleep in our own beds and call it a night asap. (she's the same age as me lol). Also forgot that the bride threw up a lot... and guess who cleaned it up? Then on her wedding day, I had to go be up in front of 200+ guests 🤢 which wasn't fun for me. There's more to that wedding but moving on...

My sisters wedding this past November was fun to be a part of! I think it was better for me because I knew everyone from the bride, groom, to the guests. My other sister was also a BM and I knew my sister (bride) other BM for years. My sis isn't a club type person as well so thankfully for her bachelorette party it was us 3 sisters and my kids and got our nails done. Then the bride went home at night with her friends and had a smoking party lol (puff puff pass pass ya know?) But since me and our youngest sister don't smoke we went home. (So my sister the bride did something with us, her sisters in respect. Then did something fun for her and her friends) so it was good all around. The wedding was also a lot smaller.

I loved being a bridesmaid. I was young when I was a bridesmaid for my sister's wedding but I loved it. I liked wearing the dress she chose for us to wear, it was stunning and it felt so cool to get done up and I felt awesome knowing I was supporting my sister on her special day. All the activities that came with it were fun too.

Yes. At a cousin's wedding. But she was quite cruel towards everyone in her bridal party, dressed us in neon body con dresses to make us look chubby and washed out and banned us wearing makeup or high heels to her ceremony. Once she asked me to squat because I am naturally taller than her, I was out. I'm sure being a bridesmaid is a lot more enjoyable for people with non-psychotic cousins, but that was the only time I was in a wedding party aside from being a flower girl at my aunts wedding.