Help!!!

You could let her tell you her opinion and then say something along the lines of, "Thanks, we'll consider it", and then do what you and your fiance want. Otherwise, tell her that you appreciate her help, but you and your fiance have a vision in mind, and you have everything covered. If you don't want her to plan your wedding, tell her you'd prefer that she just enjoys the experience as a guest instead of having to work for your wedding, and that you and your fiance will take over the planning.

View Quoted Comment Thank you so much! This help

Sit down and have a talk with her. Tell her you appreciate her offering to plan it but you have a vision of how you want your day to look

I’d thank her for the offer and inform her that you two prefer that she enjoys the day as a guest and not have to work. Inform her that you’re hiring all outside vendors because you’d prefer that your family and friends aren’t playing double roles on your wedding day.

My step mother tried to do the same thing. Just let her know that you are planning on going with a hired planner. And that if you need help, you’ll ask.

Perhaps say “that’s pretty but not our style” or phrase your vision with “ever since I was a little girl I always wanted...” hope this helps!! Your wedding day - your way girl 😉😘👍

Time to sit her down & tell her that you appreciate & value her time but it’s your wedding.
I’ve been very fortunate that hasn’t been my experience. It’s been a very unusual experience that when I ask what people want to wear, how they’re going to do their hair, etc, I get the response “whatever you want”. I’m not used to that!

"We appreciate your time and effort, but we've decided it's best to not use family as vendors so you can enjoy your day as a guest."


"Don't worry about it. We have it taken care of."
Shut this down asap. Stop using her. A proper wedding planner does what YOU want. She's less interested in helping and more interested in planning her own wedding on your dime

If you want to still keep her as a wedding planner, tell her what would help you as a bride, and how you feel when she does ___. (Give specific examples.) Be clear that you appreciate her help, but all decision-making power belongs to you, not her.

If you do not want to still keep her as a wedding planner, do the same thing as above and let her know that you think it is best to hire another wedding planner whose work style is more collaborative.