Honeymoon fund jar or no?

Sweet baby Jesus.

Are you a charity case?

@k.m. Do you know what panhandling means? "To beg in the street."

In no way am I putting my hand out and begging for money. It's an option, not required.

I have been to plenty of weddings where they do something like what I am doing. It is not offensive, no one is pressuring you to empty your wallet.

@brittany you can't call @FB rude.

She's not rude. She's right.

Flagged.

FB isn't rude she's honest! Don't panhandle at your wedding, THAT'S rude!

When asking for money or gifts of any kind, it is clear to me that I was merely invited to provide a gift/proceed for the couple. I no longer feel like I was invited to share in their joy and celebration. I was asked to share my money.

I am an adult and do not need to be told how to gift the bridal couple. When I do go to wedding as a guest, I give generously. If I'm TOLD how to gift, I RSVP "No". Coming right out and panhandling ... yes panhandling (setting out a jar) ... is just such a HUGE turn off for me.

@brittany how is putting a jar out for money not putting your hand out?!? LOL wut

.

But Brittany, you are still asking for money. Not a toaster, not a GC, but money. That's panhandling.

Skip both the honeymoon fund and dollar dance. Both are super tacky.

If I saw one at a wedding I wouldn't put money in it personally

Yes, it is considered to be tacky. I would not recommend having one.

There are precious few situations where putting out a jar and requesting donations is acceptable. All of them involve soliciting donations for someone else e.g a family has lost their home, a child needs medical treatment etc.

It is never appropriate to solicit donations from guests you are hosting at a social occasion. If I saw a jar like that at a wedding, I would be sorely tempted to hide it under the table to spare the couple the social embarrassment that such a faux pas would cause.

@Brittany: Beggars don't make you give them money either, they just put their tin cup or hat out for people...

Same thing.

And yes, it's gross. I would literally stop talking to someone if I went to their wedding and they were panhandling. I don't associate with people that crass and rude.

Yikes, I'm actually one of the few on WW that doesn't mind honeymoon funds (though I think they're dumb bc they charge fees so I wouldn't do one) but a jar at a wedding is definitely tacky

I would never say anything but I would certainly not contribute to it

Doesn't anyone ever get this destructive urge to just say YES YOU SHOULD!! sometimes?

ETA: Yes you should OP, yes you should

From what I understand, dollar dances are cultural & if that is the case...fine. Do it if you wish (although it doesn't sound like Brittney is comfortable with it).

Honey fund registry for excursions...I view it as just another option on the registry. I'm not having one & since finding out via WW that there is a fee taken out of the gifts...I can't see myself gifting to one. I'd just gift cash & the couple can use that as they wish.

Honey fund jar...that I do personally find rude...

Yup it's tacky.

Tacky as hell

Would remind me of a tip jar. Enjoy the wedding, leave a tip for the folks who brought it to you - US! Bottom line, guests should not have to open their wallets at your wedding or reception.

How do you have 4 stars and not know the answer to this already?