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Just Said Yes March 2015

How did every stray pube in the house end up stuck to my wedding gown?

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Lindsay, on March 8, 2015 at 6:21 PM

My wedding is a week from today and I decided to try the gown on for the first time since I got it back from the final fitting in January. Now, I am glad that I tried it on, because it reassured the irrational part of my brain that was afraid that it wouldn't fit any more, and I was able to take a needle and thread and tack down one of the bra cups better. But what I wasn't really thinking was that we have two cats (one black) and we haven't been vacuuming as often as we should. I walked back and forth to the bathroom in it a few times, and sat down on the bed to make sure I could sit comfortably. When I took it off and hung it up I saw hair all over the back. Cat hair, human hair, and worst, human pubic hair. An hour and six lint roller sheets and I still keep finding more. When I reach to grab a pube, the static electricity makes it skitter across the chiffon away from my hand, like "I want to be part of this dress forever! Don't you want me to be a part of your special day?"

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65 Comments

Super September 2015
Melissa · on March 10, 2015 at 10:20 AM
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I just "LOL"ed. Thank you for making my day...and I am sorry to be laughing at your misfortune. On a side note...if you are planning on getting ready at your place maybe you should vacuum...like OCD style vaccum, otherwise you might have some great stories from your photos!
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Expert September 2015
Tammy · on March 10, 2015 at 12:25 PM
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Okay having 3 cats and a dog in the house I can understand the pet hair. We vacuum 3 times a week and still pick up enough pet hair to make another cat. But pubes? WTF?
Note to self: Do not ever put dress on in the house.
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Master September 2015
MrsPope · on March 10, 2015 at 12:28 PM
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.
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Master February 2015
Bethyonce · on March 10, 2015 at 12:32 PM
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Wh...aaaaa....tttt??
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Super July 2015
futuremrs.l · on March 10, 2015 at 12:33 PM
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Omg dying.... I really need that laugh.
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Master October 2015
Uber Dami · on March 10, 2015 at 12:34 PM
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Hahah ok best post ever
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Super August 2015
WeAreOne0822 · on March 10, 2015 at 12:34 PM
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LMAO! This has me dying! Maybe wash your sheets more often?? I wash mine every week!
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Master August 2014
Nay · on March 10, 2015 at 12:47 PM
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SMH
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Master June 2015
Lori · on March 10, 2015 at 12:58 PM
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I'm washing my bathmat as soon as I get home. And my sheets.
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Super May 2015
From Mi to Mo · on March 10, 2015 at 12:59 PM
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Take it to a cleaners....
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Master February 2016
AlexisM082 · on March 10, 2015 at 1:05 PM
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@Emma & Aaron FH has a beard that never stops shedding lol. Our bathroom sink always looks like it's covered in pubes lol. That and we have 2 dogs and a cat. I'm sure one of them would love to either piss on it, or scratch the fuck out of it lol.
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Master June 2015
AndixLyn · on March 10, 2015 at 1:07 PM
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How much public hair is randomly floating in your house?
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VIP July 2015
FuturemrsDickinson · on March 10, 2015 at 1:20 PM
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Perhaps you and FH should try lazer hair removal. Just a thought.
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Master June 2015
Mrs. Kassy · on March 10, 2015 at 1:21 PM
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I gag every time I see the title of this. I'm definitely going to rampage clean my house tonight.
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Super April 2015
Mamma knows best · on March 10, 2015 at 1:27 PM
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Take your dress to the cleaners, and give your house a good cleaning session. If possible don't try your dress on again at home.
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Master August 2015
Mrs Cheapskate · on March 10, 2015 at 1:29 PM
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Roflmao!! Best....post....EVER !!!! Bbbwwwaaaahhhhh!!!!!
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Super March 2015
Finally Mrs. Crowell · on March 10, 2015 at 1:36 PM
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I'm sitting in my car in a parking lot laughing SO hard right now. This is unreal.
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Master April 2015
MrsDean · on March 10, 2015 at 2:08 PM
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That's disgusting. Your post is making me itch! And you think this is ok enough to share on the internet??? We're all judging you, I hope you know that! LOL!
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Master October 2016
Ally · on March 10, 2015 at 2:20 PM
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Did you have to bring spiders into this?????

Ugh I'm going to be so paranoid now. We have those all over here jlubgfkljebhqewfgqewfq
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Super June 2015
AleighC3 · on March 10, 2015 at 2:21 PM
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It's most likely only like 5 hairs on her dress and to her she sees 1,000's. When I put on my dress at my sisters house I saw spots on it that were not even there...I think it's because it is literally the only piece of white clothing I own.
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