How much is too much for a wedding

AMEN. I was feeling exactly like this a month or so back. I don't feel like I'm being extravagant, but when you look at the end number... I just felt so guilty. What really helped me was this: your spending should reflect your values. My future marriage is one of the things I value most in the world, therefore it makes sense that such a large portion of my finances is dedicated to this area.

I hope this helps! It's something I've had to keep repeating to myself.

One thing to consider is your location. Where do you live? I'm in SoCal, venues are expensive, photographers are expensive, food is expensive... for what I'm doing here, I could probably get married for 1/4 of what I'm spending if I lived in a different state. No one in our fam knows how much we're spending because we're paying for it & we can afford it. And I won't tell anyone because it's no ones business. Cost of living will determine prices in each area.

We're looking at about 10k when all is said and done, not including the rings and honeymoon ( all inclusive cheapish Mexico for a few days.)

It's double what we initially wanted to spend, but we can afford what we've done so far.

If I could afford to spend 60k on a wedding, I would. But we would be hurting bad so we just worked with much less. But live it up if you can and won't be hurting after the wedding is over. You'll pretty much have everything you've ever dreamt of which is awesome!

There is no right budget. It comes down to what can be comfortably afforded and what your priorities are. We set a budget of 10,000 and could have afforded more but we wanted a small wedding and a big honeymoon so we budgeted according to our priorities. I am also very frugal with money though, bought a house we could afford on one income, started saving for retirement in my early 20s, and I have always been more into using my extra income towards charity than flash. It truly comes down to personality, desires, priority, and budget. As long as you are not going into debt for your wedding I wouldn't worry too much.

Carol said it best. There's no such thing as too much. Personally, I've never imagined a $60k wedding, because that was never in the cards for me. I definitely think I would be doing things differently if I could afford to.

As long as you are comfortable with what your spending and you're treating your guests properly, do what you want. If you are questioning it, step back and re-evaluate. You don't have a lot of time but you have some to make changes. How does your FS feel about it? This is a decision both of you need to be comfortable with.

So much humblebrag!

@LG: I didn't wanna be the one to say it.

@LG & HammetUP yep.

@LG,PREACH!

Spend whatever you are comfortable spending and that will fully host your guests. I've been to $3K weddings and I've been to $250K weddings, but the similarities are that they were fully hosted events and no guests had to pay for anything from food to drink. That's what you should concern yourself with.

I regularly get the guilty waves (we're around 25k with 140 guests) and I have cut and vetoed as many extras as I can. I feel guilty all the time, mostly because I've grown up very working class, always had multiple jobs growing up and my parents both work very hard and raised us to face strong work ethics and that nothing comes free. I know they've worked hard for their money and it's tough for me to swallow them spending any significant money on my wedding (they're probably covering half - were covering the rest). I actually found my dress (my mom bought it) and even though it was in our budget, when it came time to pay, I totally freaked. It's hard to rationalize all the money for one day. But it's THE day. If you can afford it, it's worth it. Deep breaths.

@LG the only reason I read through all the comments was to hopefully find someone to call it out. Found one! TG for you!

Humblebrag is the first thing I thought when I started reading this... I'm not going to even comment on anything else.

I personally would never spend that much because we're also saving for a down payment, but I can't tell you how to feel. That seems really really high for the venue though. Ours is only around 3k, partly because we're getting married off season. Anyway we'll have around 100 guests and budget is around 20k, not including honeymoon, but that does include rings. Thanks to extremely generous parents, we will only spend about 5k on the wedding and maybe 2k on honeymoon as his family bought us flights and hotel. We are extremely lucky. But the point is, we would have eloped or done a backyard BBQ if my parents had not given us 15k. But to each her own!

We started at 10k by will probably end up around 15k. Even I'm struggling to spend that much on one day but I know how much fun the whole weekend will be.

Honestly it's completely up to you. If you can afford it (and don't go into debt piling it on credit cards) then it's your money

So the 28k venue is very likely a big company. However, the invitations, your florist, photographer etc. are great opportunities to support local small businesses. It's one of the things I'm excited for and an argument against all the judgment on wedding spending. Because it's not one day. It's the beginning of your marriage. Your friends and family have come to witness and celebrate you. The next time all those families will get together will be at your funeral.

I don't think any of us can answer that. Some people spend $1000 some spend 100k. It really depends on the wedding you can afford and are comfortable spending. Our original budget was 15k but DH decided he wanted more guests so we increased it to 20k. That would be our max we are comfortable with spending on our wedding. I think this is a conversation you need to have with your FH.

"We are paying for the wedding ourselves but my mom was generous enough to give us 15k..."

You're not paying for the wedding yourselves... your mom is helping out with A LOT of money.

Also humblebrag.

Why is this a humblebrag? Just because someone's budget is bigger than yours does not mean they're bragging. People come on here all the time asking about their smaller budgets, what is the difference with discussing larger budgets?

My wedding is $45k for 150 people! That includes my dress and stuff too though! I only plan to do this once so I'm doing it big lol. It really is a matter of what you can afford though. Everyone is in a different boat.