How much to change your date?

It would depend on how close the wedding was. Since your/she is a year out I would offer to pay all the deposits she would loose - or thats what it would have taken for me to change my date a year ago.

I had to move mine around 3 times. So at this point there is no amount of money I would accept to change. Just be super careful with this, it isn't going to be pretty in here.

Have you tried just letting her know your date and asking her? I'd be pretty offended if a *friend* asked to pay me to change my date.

Now, assume another couple wants my venue on my date, then I'd probably accept the total cost of the wedding to change my date. Pretty ridiculous, but booking vendors is not something I'd want to go through again.

She hasn't booked anything yet. She is still deciding on local or destination wedding.

Sounds a little ridiculous to me.

I'm with @michele. I would never do something like that. I'm broke enough as it is.

Just ask her first. I would be kind of offended if a friend tried to pay me off.

I know it's ridiculous but I don't know how else to convince her. She has no real reason to change it otherwise because she told me her date first- not knowing I already chose mine. She knew I wanted the same month but that was it.

Once I had the venue secured I wasn't willing to change mine for anything.

When we told our Best Man the date we had selected, he said that was his date! Since his wedding was already farther along in the planning, we changed to the week after his. They came home from their honeymoon a little bit early so he could be in our wedding.

I'm pretty cheap. So as long as it was far enough out I'd probably do it.

@LetItSnow-- you still haven't told us if you've tried to just ask her(?)

Not directly. That is my plan. To flat out ask, then if she says no, offer to pay her to reconsider.

Right now, if someone offered to pay me to change and the vendors I've booked so far are still available on a new date, sure why not. That would probably change in a few months though once vendors start getting booked up.

I would be super confused if a friend asked to pay me, though. Do you guys have lots of friends and family in common who would be invited to both? I don't get this at all, honestly. If she's okay with changing, she changes, and if not, you deal.

I don't understand. When she told you her date, did you not say "oh we actually had picked that same date and we have already booked XYZ"?

Or did you tell her and she not care?

Paying her off is weird, I agree.

I tricky situation. I would be recommend being very careful to not offend. If you want to offer her money, I think the appropriate amount would be how much changing the date will cost her. Any deposits, if any stationary is printed, if a guestbook is printed with the date on it...

But your date is pretty far out; she may not have many deposits down.

But honestly, if neither of you have any specific meaning in your date, it shouldn't be hard for either of you to change it.

...

Have you booked anything yet? If you have booked your venue and she still hasn't decided what she is doing then it sounds like she should change her date.

PS it is a great date! Snap!

I'm not at all attached to my date. If I hadn't already ordered cocktail napkins and STD's and my venues would let me, I would change my date to 7/4/15 so I could have fireworks. LOL. I have been telling everyone I want fireworks and my mom said then get married on 7/4/15 and I said no that's dumb then I booked everything for 7/11/15 and now I'm upset that I don't get fireworks!

How close of a friend is it that you wouldn't have told the date to already? All of my close girlfriends knew right away. I'd be so offended if a friend offered to pay me out of my wedding date and our date has no meaning to us. Just the principle of it is kind of bizarre.