How much to change your date?

Do you have a lot of mutual friends in which this would cause a conflict? All of my closest friends knew my date as soon as we booked it. Everyone else received a STD.

If I hadn't yet sent out the invitations, my price would be that they would have to pay for my entire wedding and all the things I couldn't have because of a budget.

I'd take $100k to change it to November.

My date is very important to me so I don't think you could pay me enough to change it, but if there is no significant value to the date I would say you'd have to at least pay back her deposits.

My date is two days after our 10th wedding anniversary, but for the right amount of $ and to still have the venue and all the vendors we currently have, I'd change it. lol

And OP - And I was thinking like OTW said. If you two don't share the same group of friends, both of you can have your weddings on the same day, and guests can choose which one to go to.

I'm confused as to why you would need to pay someone to change their date. Even if she doesn't want to change her date, oh well. It is what it is.

If she hasn't booked anything she doesn't have a date!

and i think it's crappy that you told her your date, she hasn't booked anything and for some reason is still wanting that to be her date. WTF

Why do you want her to change her date? Do you run in the same circles of friends? Do you want her to come personally? You should appeal to her emotionally - "If we both have the wedding on the same date, I won't be able to see you get married and our friends will be torn between the two. Since I booked the vendors already, would you consider moving it to another date?"

Why not just sit down & talk about it? I would feel worse if my friend tried to bribe me, rather than just having a mature discussion about it... Like adults.

We changed our date maybe three times before officially deciding. If my friend had that same date (and I either didn't know about it or she was attached to it & I wasn't) I would expect her to just come to me, AS A FRIEND, and be like, "Let's work this out."

Maybe you or her could move up on day? Have yours on a Friday or a Sunday, or the other way around?

You have over a year to plan. Slightly moving it shouldn't make a huge difference.

I have selected all my vendors but haven't booked them yet. She hasn't selected anything and hasn't booked however, she did tell me the date they were planning for first and I didn't say anything at the time. It's a bit complicated because I'm one of those people who go engaged without a proposal. We just decided to get married and started making plans. So there was no big announcement and we decided not to make one until my ring comes in...hence why I didn't tell her before. We aren't best friends but we are good friends. We don't have same-guests so that's not the issue. I just know she will be ticked when I tell her we want that date and I want her to choose another because in her mind she was engaged first and 'claimed' the date first.

The whole idea about paying her to change it is to just give her some incentive to do so.

This can't be a serious post.

Edit: This reminds me of the movie Bride Wars. lol

So neither of you have booked anything and at the time she told you her desired date you said nothing about it being your date as well? I'm a bit confused but...until you or her book the venue or some other vendor, neither of you have a date. Just talk to her and let her know that her date is the same date you were looking at and see if she's willing to change it since you wouldn't want to miss out on attending each other's weddings. As others have stated, paying your friend off for a wedding date is not a good idea.

If someone were trying to essentially bribe me into changing my date, I'd be like, "um, no." Just try talking to her. If you guys aren't super close and don't run in the same core social group, I wouldn't worry about it.

For the sake of the relationship, please don't ask her. Just tell her you had the same date in mind as well, but are waiting to hear back from vendors availability. Also, I'd start booking those vendors NOW. Otherwise, don't be mad if she booked them first.

Well if I were her I'd be pissed to since you didn't mention it from the beginning. I would definitely think you were lying and especially because you were bribing me I'd be like wtf

Ooooo - paying off a friend for a wedding date...what is the underlying message here?

"I know you're broke but if I throw money at you, can I get what I want?"

That's how I would interpret this...

So .... Neither of you have a date? Just book different dates!!

So if nothing is booked for either of you why don't you have a grown up conversation about it and see what she says. You should have said something when she mentioned it though . Your making a mountain out of a mole hill.