How to mix Chinese traditions into our western wedding?

You could wear red to the formal wedding banquet. You could present wine or tea to your parents, his parents, your groom, and guests.

Maybe you could ask his mother for her recommendations as well.

I'm not very familiar with Chinese culture..but I'm current trying to figure out how I am going to incorporate the Chinese symbol for "double happiness" which (from what I hear) if traditionally used for weddings. My FH got me a necklace with this symbol for our first Christmas together (2008) so it's pretty special to us. Could be an interesting way to add Chinese decor to your wedding?

View Quoted Comment There’s a bit of a language barrier between his family and mine. His mom knows some English but not a lot. But thank you I have heard of a tea ceremony but don’t know a whole lot about it. I’ll try to research it more thank you!

Seeing your comment about a language barrier maybe you could have a translator there or your ceremony script translated into Chinese for your fiance's family to follow along with.

Hi Natalie,
when you get time, watch this video of a traditional Chinese wedding. Perhaps you can get a few ideas. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=fBpWdoz8OYI

As someone else marrying into the same culture, paper umbrella and lanterns definitely feel very costumey and stereotypical, I wouldn’t recommend it. If you want to incorporate his culture while still being respectful, consider having a Chinese tea ceremony!

My friend is Chinese, but she grew up here. She said their weddings incorporate a lot of red, and she mentioned a fruit...I think it was peaches..? I can't exactly remember. Also I remember her saying that they avoid the number four due to bad luck, like when numbering tables that number would be skipped. She said after the wedding they do karaoke and get drunk, haha. Sorry I am not more help, this is all I can remember..

I would also suggest considering having a tea ceremony. But definitely check with the family first. A lot of families don't do that.

In terms of language barrier, can't he translate an email for you?

Definitely do not do the fans, lanterns or umbrellas.

The Chinese translations may be appreciated (I translated our signs to 2 other languages as my family and his family don't speak much english).

I like the idea of having signs in Chinese especially since his family is traveling from China. Here is a good article The Chinese Wedding, hopefully this helps. I think incorporating Symbolic dishes and food into the reception part and incorporating the "fashion" aspect of Chinese wedding is a good idea and depending on how traditional his parents are, you might want to consider doing a "Traditional Tea Ceremony" Hope this is helpful

View Quoted Comment

I'm thinking the fruit was oranges? as they symbolize prosperity

View Quoted Comment Maybe that's right! I just knew it was some fruit, but couldn't remember

I did a Chinese Tea Ceremony wearing a traditional red gown about 3 hrs before the ceremony, then everything back to the original style!

Other ideas: Would you mom want to wear Qi-pao style dress day of? Double-happiness wedding candies for favors, Chinese on wedding invite, put a few engagement photos where you wore a redd/gold dress?

I'd say skip the umbrellas and lanterns.

Chinese Tea ceremony decor

I would look into traditional Chinese weddings and find ways to incorporate it. Maybe talk to your FH about which aspects would be most honoring to his culture and include them.

View Quoted Comment We will definitely have a translator thanks for the tip.

View Quoted Comment Since our wedding will be outside I was thinking of having lanterns regardless so I’ll probably just do regular lanterns instead of the more Chinese ones. I love the idea of a tea ceremony I just don’t know so much information on it like how to do it, when to do it (the day before the wedding, before ceremony) and it seems very intimate so I would know who to invite for that. It all seems very overwhelming trying to figure out how to include his culture without knowing much about it. Thanks for your feedback

View Quoted Comment Thanks Gabbie this is extreamly helpful!! I have heard of the tea ceremony but was so confused on how it all works and this is very helpful to read more in detail of what it actually is and the meaning behind some of these things.

Hi! I'm Chinese Filipina American and my husband is Italian American (polish and Irish too I think). We had a brunch themed wedding and his grandmother made Italian cookies as a gift to us for a dessert. I asked my mother to make a Filipino cassava cake and to bring a Chinese mocha roll cake. My parents were born in their respective countries so I'm first generation. We had guests from China as well and they loved that little touch as those desserts were some that I (and they) grew up eating as a child.

I have been to a few weddings that were held at banquet halls and full blown Chinese.
I do feel like when you begin to bring in fans and lanterns things could get a bit gaudy. But! I think they can be done elegantly.

What are your wedding colors? Like some others have mentioned, vibrant red, gold, and Jade are all colors that are in the Chinese culture. A phoenix and dragon, double happiness, good fortune are symbols of the Chinese culture.

Chinese lanterns that you launch are also beautiful but you need to check if it's okay to release in your area.

If your groom doesn't care, truly, and is excitable about other aspects of planning, try to add in your own cultural elements or stuff of your upbringing and see if he'll bite. Also it's truly okay to have your own vision as a couple and to not incorporate things that he doesn't care for as long as the wedding is a reflection of the both of you.

I am currently helping my cousin who's Chinese with her wedding stationery and signage. She's doing Clementine escort cards.

Here's a wedding I found that's boho Western and Chinese
https://www.marthastewartweddings.com/411340/pomme-pennsylvania-chinese-wedding-emily-wren

I would definitely talk to your fiancé to see if his family have any particular expectations (aka. Get him to ask!) A lot of Chinese folks from China are giving up on some of the more traditional elements and more comfortable with modern-style weddings. My fiancé’s family was expecting more of a legit Chinese banquet style wedding (but that was their assumption) while we were venue-searching, but we are doing an American style wedding because that what we want. If it’s important to his family to see specific traditions, something like the tea ceremony is a nice way to incorporate it (especially for grandparents). I’m sure they’ll already be pleased that you asked. You could consider wearing a qipao for the reception or at least for a receiving line where his parents would also get to greet the guests. If you want them to feel included in the planning and you don’t have a set date yet, you could ask them to find auspicious wedding dates for you.