How to reach out to guests about rsvps

Yes, follow up with them within that last week. You can say something like, "Hello__! I hope you are having a wonderful summer. I am actually in the last stages of finalizing my guest count as the vendor needs it by tomorrow. Did you happen to still plan on attending my wedding on ___ since I did not receive your RSVP in the mail?" Just leave it at that because they will know you need an answer ASAP. But if they do not text back then I would call them. If they don't answer yet again then leave them a voicemail and be a little firm that by not responding by tonight you will know that you can assume they chose no.

View Quoted Comment That sounds perfect thank you!

It’s very common for guests to reply at the last minute. The due date for rsvps will have a big chunk of cards in the mail. You tally those first and then immediately start calling the rest who have not replied. And continue through the list until you are done which is a day or two. Do not call before the due date to remind them because they are adults. Let them know you need to know today if they are attending and if they can’t attend, they will be marked as a no and missed. They give you an answer on the spot or are marked as a no. There is wiggle room there for any situation. Add those results to the rest of the rsvps and give the final count to the caterer.


If people show up the day of after telling you they would not attend, they won’t have a place to sit nor will there be enough food and drinks.

I definitely got back a final flurry of RSVPs right at our due date, and still had to follow up with 20-30% of our guest list!

I really like Heather's suggested wording, with the emphasis on how your vendors need the final headcount! If any guests don't respond to your first outreach, then after a few days I do one last follow-up asking if they can attend and include "if I don't hear back from you I'll assume you won't be able to make it". That way you've made it clear that if they don't respond there won't be a spot for them!