Husband is best man.. where does that leave me?

Thanks bella.. great idea, except I sometimes get queasy while drinking.. still something to think about trying anyway!

Yea I would feel the same way you do. That's why on our wedding we will not split couples. One of my BM will be there with her husband who is not in the wedding but we still want him to eat at our table. So only during the ceremony he will be by himself.

At my wedding, the spouses and partners of the wedding party offered to pitch in and help! The BM's guys helped set up the ceremony space and put out programs, the GM's wives ran people's bouts to them, and rounded people up for shuttle buses, and so forth. It made it feel like a team effort. I'd ask if there's anything you can do to help...it's better to be busy than lonely!

FH and I are going thru the same thing for a wedding I'm in. I have to be at the rehearsal dinner & with the bridal party pretty much the whole day. That leaves FH alone at the hotel until the ceremony starts… I'm just trying to make it as easy as possible for him since he only knows one other person on the guest list. Thankfully the bride is having a sweetheart table so I can sit with him for the dinner.

Actually the same thing happened to me. My husband was the best man in his brother's wedding. Although, I pretty much knew everybody there, I still sat with others and drove to the reception alone. It didn't bother me one bit. It's only for one day and it's not like we were apart all night.

Alicja, that's really awesome that you considered your BM's husband. Had any of our GMs or BMs been married, I would have done it the same way.

I am sure there will be other GF/DS/ FS there that will feel the same way as you. Get chatty and like Shannon suggested see if you can help. If you feel that uncomfortable perhaps you stay home.

My ex husband was the BM at his best friends wedding. (The guy we named my oldest after) I ended up helping with the bride, running errands. It DID suck to sit in the church alone. But they included me in the rehearsal dinner, etc. It's just part of the gig! The spouses of our wedding party will be involved in the rehearsal dinner, etc.

We are doing BP seating like Alicja is. They will be seated with their spouses. It's not that uncommon and maybe this couple is doing the same. If not you can always stay home. Since they aren't good friends of yours why be uncomfortable for no reason?

Shannon, I had that same thought, but I didn't want to overstep my ground and make the bride think "Oh now that her husband's bestman, she thinks she deserves a role too." I don't know.. I probably need to just suck it up and go with the flow with whatever happens..

Yes it sucks that he is part of the wedding party because he will be riding with them, you will have to sit alone during ceremony, and eat lone... BUT... look at this way -

#1. Ceremonies usually don't last too long and nobody is socializing during this anyways, everyone is concentrating on the bride & groom. So this shouldn't be too much of a biggie because nobody is talking to anyone.

#2. He only has to sit with them during dinner. After dinner and toasts which are usually done during or around dinner, he can go where he pleases which means #3.

#3. After dinner, you guys can hit the dance floor and spend time together for the rest of the wedding.

So you should only feel "alone" in this wedding for maybe an hour for dinner? Then you guys can enjoy the rest of the wedding together.

hope maybe if you think about it like that then you will feel better hun

And I'd really rather not stay home, because like I said, this is the first wedding my husband and I have been invited to together. That's probably why I'm making such a big deal out of it.. because I'd want to spend the time WITH him. But this is not about me and it's not my day. I just needed you ladies to assure me I wasn't unjustified for being a little upset.

And I'd really rather not stay home, because like I said, this is the first wedding my husband and I have been invited to together. That's probably why I'm making such a big deal out of it.. because I'd want to spend the time WITH him. But this is not about me and it's not my day. I just needed you ladies to assure me I wasn't unjustified for being a little upset.

Yes in my wedding Couples sat with us. I told DH that it was tradition to split them up but he was against it. He was like really? That makes no sense. Even though he was GM at a wedding once and none of the couples sat with each other. My family made a big deal out of couples sitting together too (against it). It worked out well having couples together in the end.

Kristina, that helps put it into perspective for me =) Thanks!

When we were looking at venues, the coordinators stated that it is more common now, that the bridal party is seated in with the guests. So that is what we are going to do and just have "our table" by ourselves. I love the idea, and everyone will feel comfortabable that way.

I've been in this situation before and I'll be in this same situation in a few weeks, and honestly, it's never occured to me that I would feel lonely. I'm a pretty social person though, so I don't usually have a problem striking up a conversation with a stranger haha.

In my experience at most weddings I've been too (where my FH was in the wedding party or vice versa), the bride and groom would put the other person at a table of people who they think that person would get a long with (like people in the same age group etc). I've never felt awkward and neither has my FH.

I say, have a drink and relax and just enjoy yourself! You'll only be sitting "alone" during dinner and speeches anyways, so you'll be preoccupied listening and eating

Have fun!!

I would feel awkward, that's why at my wedding me and fh only sitting at the sweetheart table.

You know, he'll probably only be away from you from the start of the wedding until the reception.. he may eat at the table, but it's more than likely he'll be with you for the rest of the night. Don't worry, it will be fine.. like watching him in a performance and then going with him to the after party

Kristina B took the words out of my mouth! or fingers actually lol! Also I think it's normal to feel how you are feeling, I myself don't like being around a bunch of people I don't know with nobody else I know..but like for the ceremony whenever I've interacted with people I didn't know, it was mainly just small talk, like oh how do you know the bride and groom, stuff like that, really no biggie! You can talk about that stuff at dinner too, and hopefully there will be a chatty person or couple at your table that keeps the conversation flowing :-) You'll be okay! Plus usually the bridal party gets served first, I'm sure your DS will hop over to your table at least for a few minutes to check on you!