Husbands Sex Drive Seems Lower Now

Is there anything going on in terms of his stress levels, etc

Yes, maybe its stress. Is he taking any type of medication? You should just try talking to him or maybe suggest a date night.

Mhm I would say it isnt normal, especially if you were having sex often when dating and now its once a week. I would probably sit down and tell him how you feel and ask him to see if he has insight on why it's just once a week. Def could be stress or maybe a major life change.

Everyone's sex drive is different, and can change over life due to life coming up, depression, etc. So you're not weird and nothing is inherently wrong.
But given that you are bothered by it and you're wanting a more active sex life, the first step is taking it up with them. They may not notice or may be fine with the change - then you'd have to express your needs and see if there's a compromise.
If they also think it's an issue, then you can work on it together. After 10 years, we've seen our intimacy change. We're open about it with each other, and we've talked that the most important for us (right now at least) is having lots of affection and touch. That doesn't mean sex - so for me, if we had sex everyday but didn't hug/ snuggle/ touch throughout the day, I'd be pretty unhappy (and honestly probably would avoid him because sometimes sex is exhausting 😂).Figure out together what mix is good for you, and touch base on it a few times a year. Hope that helps!

Cant say if it's normal or not normal...everyone is different...i would talk with him and explain how you feel. . .

View Quoted Comment Honest question, in reading your post. Is there anything that you and your husband used to do early in dating that now you don't do (or don't do as often)?
My partner and I also used to talk for like 2 hours a day in these deep conversations in the beginning - 10 years in, we do that sometimes but gosh I'm not sure what we'd even come up with for that much time!

Only thing is the quarantine impacted our date nights. We used to go out once a week. That's it. We also have been seeing a counselor together so our communication has improved. Our relationship isnt perfect, but If theres ever a night where we dont have sex due to mood or just tired, we make it up to each other the next day. I only say it's not normal because we have sex about 4x a week and if it went to 1x a week I would be concerned because that's not our normal.

Well, I have to say I don’t think sex once a week is that bad and I think that’s actually pretty normal. But if it’s something that makes you feel uncomfortable, maybe you should talk to him first and it might be a good idea to seek out a sex counselor if he’s comfortable or maybe even a marriage therapist instead if he’s not comfortable. They give really good tips on how to bring the spice back but I think it’s really important that both partners have to be very open and willing about it. I think the best thing is probably to have this conversation with your husband.

View Quoted Comment Yeah, it's whatever your normal is - and sometimes there's a new normal, and everyone just figures it out.
Cheers!

View Quoted Comment Good luck!

View Quoted Comment Ugh.... Maybe a little money issues. We are getting by. But he wants to save more and sometimes we can't. He also has a very physical job. He's a machine operator at a factory. Sometimes the poor man is just bone tired when he gets home. I have his dinner ready and give him a good back rub then.... He's out. Usually only get hanky panky in Saturday for some reason

View Quoted Comment Thanks for that I wanted to talk to him because I didn't want to nag but maybe that's for the best

View Quoted Comment True..... Date night was the highlight of my week now its movie night!

View Quoted Comment We used to text all day, Talk on the phone more.We didn't move in with eachother tuntil we we're engaged It was definitely typical honeymoon phase stuff. The quality of the sex isn't the issue. Its was and still is top notch. The frequency is not what I want it to be but getting caught up in day in and day out living life I guess is setting in.

View Quoted Comment It definitely helps thank you. Maybe I should value intimate things as well. Like you said a little cuddling or a nice foot rub. Maybe something simple like doing it somewhere other than the bed.

View Quoted Comment See I agree I don't want to think the worst but my mind wonders sometimes.

View Quoted Comment Job is physical he is very tired usually on weekdays. So we do it in weekends usually Saturday. He is taking some medication for nerve pain in his fingers from a previous work accident but I've never thought to research the medication for possible side effects

I think it’s pretty normal. I think that happens when you get comfortable and have been with each other for a while!

Just be open with your spouse about it but if you see that it starts to bother him just ease it down a bit. Maybe start the conversation about him and how he is doing at work and you noticed he has been more tired than the usual and then bring about this conversation. Hopefully this helps. But the key is to communicate how you feel. It's normal when someone starts to work so much and his job sounds like a big work load. Best wishes!

View Quoted Comment That's what I was hoping