i need some uplifting words!

I'm so sorry that this isn't going to be the day you wanted. I hope it all turns out well and I wish you the best of luck with your marriage.

I am SO sorry you are going through this. I’m sending you a hug. Stay positive - as hard as it seems.. it will be okay. It’s not about venues, pictures, flowers, etc. it’s about marrying the person of your dreams and opening the doors to a new journey in life together. Focus on the good. Change what you can and F Everyone else. Sorry but it’s not about them. It’s about YOU. Pick and choose what you want bc at the end of the day, this is your memory of “the big day” and you want it to be something good not stressful and you feeling badly about it. I would sit with your fiancé - talk, tell him how you feel and then start small / making what changes you CAN make to tweek it into what you really want and not worry about anything else . You got this !!!!

View Quoted Comment Thank you ❤️ That’s just it, I wanted something small and he’s got the guest list at 200 people now. I don’t see the sense in doing all of this. We’ll see what happens, I guess.

Wedding planning is very frustrating. I am really sorry you feel this way because ultimately it should be a happy time but any time you plan a huge life event it can be stressful. I really think you should sit down with your future husband and really talk to him and tell him how you feel. If a big wedding isn't what you want then cut back on the guest list. Were these people formally invited?

View Quoted Comment They were given save the dates. I was kinda rudely notified that ANYONE that got a save the date HAS to get an invitation. Unless we cancel the whole thing, that is, which is still an option, in my opinion.

I'm so sorry your dealing with this. That is a tough situation. My opinion do what would make you happy. Your so close if you decide to do just a small thing elope or wait a year do what your comfortable with. I originally wanted to elope but the deciding factor for me was I want all my loved ones there to celebrate and I knew I'd regret it if I didnt have that. Good luck with whatever you decide and take a deep breath you got the man the rest will fall into place.

Maybe all the add-ons won’t be able to come ? J am so sorry. Maybe you could do ceremony only invites and a small reception? I don’t know but it will all workout even though it feels scary right now

View Quoted Comment Yeah I can see that ending badly if someone got a save-the-date and then they were not invited to the wedding. Sorry you were rudely told that. Well have you spoken to your future husband about how you are feeling? Ultimately if you do decide to not have the wedding now would be the time to tell people. Some people will get upset but they will get over it. The only option I could probably give would to be to do a destination wedding because unless people are really close to you they are not going to pay to travel. A friend of mine who I really haven't seen in about a couple of years now invited me to her wedding and I did not end up going because it was a 10-day cruise and she did it not long after the start of the new school year and I'm a teacher. I was going to fly to the Bahamas to see the ceremony but it was on a Tuesday which is in the middle of the week. If she were a really good friend of mine or if I were in the wedding party I would have taken the time to go there but for someone that's not that close to me I wouldn't. Ultimately if you do want it to be maybe just you two and some parents you need to do what makes you happy because ultimately it is one day and it's not worth feeling miserable to probably not enjoy your day as much as you would. Just ultimately think about what you really want in the long run and make sure that if you don't have the full wedding that you won't regret it later but I think you and your future husband should sit down and talk about some things that way you can both be satisfied.

View Quoted Comment Ugh. I’d be inclined to cancel. How much would you lose? Might it be possible you’d keep vendors (venue, photographer, etc) if you rescheduled? Maybe cancel, regroup with your fiancé, choose a new date, then plan the small wedding you want and share NO details with your mom????

I agree with pirate bride. I would also ask is it the reception that is the most stressful part or is it the ceremony? If it's the reception that I will just stay really scaled back and make it very informal. Just have some food and have some people chilling around don't worry about seeing or anything like that. Also if it's the idea of a ton of people that you probably don't even have a relationship with watching you commit to your future husband that like others have said just have a small intimate ceremony and it have the reception after.

hang in there, love. It's stressful. Remember to practice self care and take a breather.

Broke my heart when I read "nothing about this is what I want." it definitely should be. As others have said, it's YOUR day. If it's becoming stressful more than anything, maybe you should sit down with your fiancé and let him know how you feel and talk about postponing/cancelling. I personally don't think it's too big of a deal if you end up telling the people who received STD's that you decided on a more intimate wedding. I truly wish you the best and hope everything works out. This should be a really joyful time! Wedding planning is stressful but should lead to a day of happiness and exactly what you've dreamed of.