Ideas for bridging rustic and formal?

Forgot to mention, maybe "formal" isn't the best word. Tania & Jason said it better by using the word elegant.

Also, we are having a 9 piece band on that tiny stage in the back of the picture (they will have to spill out on the dance floor and to the right). They wear tuxes for their weddings and the one female wears an evening gown, so I think that will kick things up a notch.

The venue offers both burlap and lace to go over cocktail "tables" (wine barrels) and on the dessert table. I'll be going with the lace, staying away from the burlap.

The venue doesn't allow real candles because of all the wood (so sad!), but my florist has LED ones to rent that look better than I thought they would. The venue also has stuff to fill out the gift, escort card, and dessert tables such as crates, but I don't think crates are the look I'm going for.

What about milk vases? Maybe I can find those for cheap. Although I won't be able to drop them off early if I want flowers in them (so many rules with these places).

Hopefully those who can help are getting a better idea of what the venue will look like and what I can do to help bring my blurry vision into focus!

Glad you're staying away from burlap because that's not elegant. I did lace overlays, and they turned out beautifully. I also had real china that I rented.

Milk glass is very popular where I'm from and beautiful; they ran anywhere from $1-$10 depending on the size and style. I collected a lot of stuff at antique, thrift, yard sales, ebay, and peddler's malls. I also saw a ton of stuff on craigslist and FB sell groups.

I think it is very possible! Search Pinterest for "elegant barn wedding". I saw lots of good ideas.

I would add some rice lights (little white lights) and some "diamonds" -- jewel touches. Not a lot, but a little. For example, burlap and "diamonds". I'll attach some pictures to show what I mean. Could you pair gold or silver in with the pale yellow/pink? Such as gold or silver chargers. The lights will shimmer off of that giving it a gorgeous look!

Or, if you are doing vases of flowers on the tables, and a few fake diamonds to the water. The light will catch it and shimmer! Adding small details to reflect, refract, and show light can add an elegant feel.

Drape-y table cloths like in attached photo look nice. They also incorporated the shimmery gold in their chairs and mini lights.

@Brigit: For centerpieces, I'm going to let my florist have at it (within a reasonable budget!). She's very good at what she does, and I freakin' love flowers!! So I think she'll be able to come up with an arrangement that both fits the venue and isn't, as you put it, like a hoedown! I am looking for elements to add to the escort card table, dessert table, and gift table.

THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR GREAT LINKS, PHOTOS, AND IDEAS!! It's really helping!!!

Also, here is a photo (from pinterest) that my friend is copying for possibly the escort card table:

There will be 3 - faith, hope, and love.

Also, we're getting married in my church, so we don't have to worry about a ceremony space at least

Yes I think the word formal threw people off. When I first read this I thought "wtf would you choose a barn as your venue if you wanted a formal wedding" but I get it now.

All these photos people are posting are making me so excited!! How will I get any work done today... I will be sneaking on Pinterest all day! lol

Your venue looks very pretty and so not what I had pictured when you said it was a "rustic barn"! I think you're smart to skip the burlap and I agree that crates are not going to give you the elegant look you're after. I'm not sure what you mean by milk vases--milk glass vases? Milk bottles?

@Rebecca - sorry for the confusion! You're right. Formal and rustic don't mesh, either in an actual barn or the reverse. Just tried to imagine it.... yikes!

If you're going with tuxes, that venue, and want an elegant/formal feel, let the venue be the most rustic thing there. Avoid all crates, burlap, mason jars (I would even be careful with milk glass), use more natural feeling flower arrangements (lots of greenery, big, bright blooms), lots of candles, maybe some more interesting china if you can find it, add some warm metallics.

Milk glass vases aren't as inexpensive as you would think, i bought mine and i could get nice size groupings on ebay but it was still about $80 to $100 for the 30 bud vases that i got ( since i did groupings of them on the tables). i would keep the tables simple since you have restrictions with your venue.

these might be nice simpler centerpieces for your venue.

lantern with a battery powered candle since you cant have flames.

@Jessi: Milk vases:

I agree with @Jeanne... let the "barn feel" and exposed wood be the rustic part. Dress it up with Chiavari chairs (if you can afford) but don't do chair covers on any chair. Waaay to ballroom-y and formal. Add touches of "bling" and stick with clear vases and gorgeous full floral arrangements. Add candles, light, and something that can shine!

I don't mind Jen; that is Perona Farms, in Andover NJ, and their barn is really one of the prettiest barn spaces we work in. It's a bit unusual because it has all the 'barny' elements, but everything they do there is very elegant. You could never turn it into a ballroom space, but that's not why people book it. The uplighting (which I usually hate) is a really spectacular touch, and the fabric draping is gorgeous.

I also think the wording might have thrown people off. Barn doesn't always mean burlap and baby's breath; in most cases, (at least what I've seen at Crossed Keys, Jack's Barn, Perona, etc) the decor is very sophisticated and totally NOT 'diy-ish".

I wouldn't worry about anything you can't afford to do at this point. If it's a pretty enough space with some fabulous fabric, let it just go. Less, in many cases, really is more.

Included with venue: Linens- we picked either white or ivory table cloths (can't remember now!) with yellow (not too bright not too pale) napkins to match the bridesmaids; the chairs that you see in the picture I posted above (no covers); all the tableware - dishes, glasses, etc. We don't have to rent anything. The decor package also in the picture above is the most ELEGANT (see my word choice there? ) of all their decor packages. Also, I saw pictures of how the food is plated when we went for our detail appointment - very upscale looking. What looked more rustic was how they set up the dessert table.

I recently got an email from the venue that said they had tons of stuff to decorate things like the dessert, gift and escort card tables, but couldn't guarantee what would be available for your day. I guess I just need to show them photos and describe what I'm looking for, and hope they can do it. But it will help if I have my own items for these tables in case they are only left with burlap and wooden crates that day (they have 2 other venues they hold weddings at, so the extras move between venues).

I agree with @Celia Milton- do what you are able to afford, of course you want it to look nice but don't kill your self over it. your space isn't overly rustic so without burlap and mason jars its going to look nice.

personally if its in your budget the big thing i would do is rent nice table cloths in a color that goes with your vision. those will make a nice statement, nice flowers also. maybe some battery powered votive candles. that really all you need for that space.

eta: just saw that linens were included in your package, if they don't have upgrades then i would just stick with what you have already chosen.

Hey Britt! When I first started the planning process, DH and I were thinking not formal, rustic, laid back. As we went through the process, it ended up being more semi-formal/rustic. I don't have pro pics back yet, but lighting and centerpieces definitely played a big part in dressing up our venue. We were at a winery that definitely could have been rustic. I think you are definitely on track with the fabric and lighting. I hope to have pics back soon and once we do, I'd love to share!

Thanks again everyone! Looking forward to seeing your pix @WithHItch11/07

Maybe with just the centerpieces and LED votives it will all come together. I'll keep pinteresting the phrases mentioned for ideas to dress up dessert, escort and gift tables without going overboard. Usually I'm not so bad at visualizing these things... guess I'm just nervous it won't look as nice as all my other friends' weddings in the past 3 years

For dessert/gift/escort card tables just add a flower arrangement, maybe a candle and call it good. It really doesn't need to be anything crazy, people will spend all of two minutes (if that much) at those tables.