Invitation list

The best way to handle the situation are:
1: Of course: to tell them why you don't want X or Y. Be honest, unless you're talking about under 18? In this situation, rather than saying you don't want to see/hear kids and infants crying,screaming, making scenes, running around, wasting the food etc... say you want the parents to enjoy a night (or day?) off, be able to relax,drink without having to worry about having to track them down etc . if you're talking about adults you and/or your partner don't want: just be honest, and you could blame it to the venue's maximum capacity. Plus: if you and your partner are paying, you could blame your decisions on the limited budget in addition to the venue's capacity.

2: You can hire security on the day of at the reception entrance,so only those who are on the guest list you give to the venue, are allowed to enter. Problem solved but, of course, if someone brings unwanted people behind your back and these unwanted guests can't come, the guests you invited may be upset and decide not to enter.

To answer the question: we are not worried because we're hiring security, so problem solved... but man, it's sooooooooooooo frustrating!

We allowed our parents to get 10 people each, among their friends, their cousins,uncles,aunts but only those who are in my life (or my future husnand's) for at least 10 years, met my fiancé (or me) before we got engaged and if we seen them at least once a year. We limited to 10 each becausd our guest count is 120 , so they can have 40 guests total, 1 third of the list but no more than that %.

Both dads are happy with our rules because they thought we wouldn't invite any of their friends and own extended family members since we are paying for 100% but the frustrating part is that the moms want to invite more: bigh gave us a list of 40-45: we were like (in our minds) What the hell? Are yoy serious? We are not inviting that many people we don't care about and who don't really care about us either and some.of whom we haven't met, not even in a billion years

If someone is trying to invite someone else to your wedding and you don't intend to invite that person, definitely stand your ground! To the person who is trying to invite others, you could say something along the lines of, "I'm sorry, but we are unable to accommodate additional guests. Please let [name] know that they will not be able to attend."

I’ve had to deal with 3 people asking if they could have a plus one and 2 adults asking if they could bring their uninvited children. It’s actually very common these days for people to ignore proper etiquette and ask you anyway. Like PPs have said STAND YOUR GROUND. I have, and I have mostly had good results. If you site budget reasons or just say you can’t accommodate additional guests than who’s on the list, they will usually back down. I only had one problematic person who tried to push the issue further - even asking me if he could pay us for his BRAND NEW GIRLFRIEND to come with him (she did not exist when I sent the invites out…). I said no. Then FURTHER he said he will just come to our ceremony only AND BRING HER. I knew that would get us in a sticky situation if I let him do that, so I kindly asked to chat over the phone, politely told him “we want to keep the ceremony intimate to just those that were invited” and he has finally backed down. Yeah, it’s not fun, but it’s so much easier to have these conversations now than to see all these uninvited people showing up and causing a storm because there’s no chairs or plates for them.

I dont think I'd have this problem because I dont put up with much bs, just being honest. If a guest asked me "hey can I bring X?" I would simply say no, the guest list is already set. There's no need for further discussion, its not their event (unless it's your parents or someone else paying for it).

Yes!! 80% of my family have yet to send back rsvps so i have now clue whos actually going to show up and my wedding is june 18th