invitation start time vs. ceremony start time

^ Maybe it's just me not reading out the words how they are actually meant. But if you put "quarter to three" my slow brain wouldnt read 2:45, it would read 3:25. Unfortunately you have people out there like me who will read it incorrectly. And I know it's proper to spell out the time on invites, but this is why I'm actually just putting ex. 2 pm/2:30 pm... on mine.

So honestly, I would put 3pm, mostly everyone are adults & should know by now that for special events, to arrive early. I bet not one of them would show up late for a concert they wanted to see, your wedding is more special than that, so it should be treated as such an event. Screw late comers, their own damn fault if they miss it.

We put 4:00 on our invites and agreed to start the ceremony once it felt like everyone had shown up and gotten seated. I am not sure how much after 4PM we started, but it wasn't more than 5-10 minutes. And if anyone came in late, I definitely did not notice. They were discreet and I was focused on other things.

And instead of "quarter to three", maybe "quarter before three"?

I would be very annoyed as a guest if I arrived then had to wait 30 minutes for the "real start time." I am the person who usually shows up just before I have to, but for a wedding, I make an effort to make sure I show up at least 15 min early and if I then have to wait and added 30 mins, that brings my waiting time to 45 min - making me an unhappy camper.

I say, build some wiggle room into the schedule so that starting 10-15mins late isn't the end of the world, or just start the ceremony on time, regardless of who is/isn't there (with the exception of the bride/groom/minister.) Those who were late will just miss the ceremony.

Edit: You could also put "two fourty five in the afternoon" if you are worried about people misreading the "quarter to three"

We are starting on time. period.

I think 1/2 an hour is pretty long to have guests sitting there as even though there may be the few people who are late, chances are most will be there on time.

I've been to weddings that have not started for 30-45 minutes after the time written on the invitation and I was honestly mad/upset! It was SO hot outside and extremely uncomfortable. I made a vow to myself to NOT do this to my guests.

15 minutes I can see.. but more than that, too long and I also agree... I feel it is disrespectful to your guests.

I would put your actual start time on the invitations. I'm always early - so a 45 minute wait time for me (my 15 minute earlieness + the caterer's 30 minute cushion) would REALLY annoy me.

No one is more in love with starting on time than I am. The point is, if you say 2:30, be ready to start at 2:30, no exceptions. You'll get no argument from me.

It's just that getting anyone anywhere in NYC or thereabouts (and I'm sure it's similar in DC, LA...) is nigh on impossible.

I think the bottom line is what YOU want to do. If you know your friends are always late but you can't start without them, lie to them. If you are willing to start on time with whoever is there, then more power to you!!!! Let's do it!

We put 4:30 on our invitations, and plan to start at 4:45. Our ceremony is outside, however, guests can mingle in the lounge with ice water, lemonade, etc, until the ceremony starts.

This is standard in my area, and most folks here are aware of this. In addition, since it will be a Jewish wedding, we have a small ceremony before the actual ceremony, so we're starting that at 4:15, and as soon as that is done (about 30 minutes), we'll have everyone get seated and we'll start.

We're so used to things not starting on time - but its still always my goal to get places on time. I guess we just expect folks to be running a few minutes late!

Unless you have something planned to keep your guests occupied (Mad Libs, musical entertainment, etc) for the half hour, I'd stick with your original time on the invites and start when you are ready.

I agree with what some of the other ladies have said to. I usually arrive 15-20 mins BEFORE the start time of the wedding (leaving early enough the allow for traffic, etc when there usually is none). If you put a fake time, people will be up being there way too early.

Don't lie to me about the time. If I am late then have someone asking me to wait outside of the ceremony area. If I am on time or early I do not want to feel like a punished schoolchild. I hate hate hate to be kept waiting.

I guess this is one aspect of wedding planning that I gave no extra thought to. Our invitations say ceremony starts at 5. We're starting at 5. If anyone shows up late, they're missing the ceremony.

ETA: we live in a very rural area with few traffic issues, and our venue is the only major landmark at the very end of a 9 mile long road. That road is the only way to the venue, except by boat. So if there's a major accident on that road, either NONE of my guests will make it to the wedding, or they'll show up wind blown.

Ours say two and it's suppose to start at 2 .... I am 10 minutes late to everything not on purpose it just happens... if we start at two guest will have to wait outside (there is no other option I'm lining up in the back of the church and it's a small space) until I have walked down the aisle

Ours will say 3:00 and if people are not there by 3:00 then they will come in late. I'm not waiting on people that are too rude to show up on time. My ceremony will only last about 25 minutes so if they are too late, they'll just miss that whole dang thing.

For all of those people saying I hate waiting and 30 minutes is too long to wait I completely disagree with you. This day is not about you and i don't care if you have to sit and wait for 30 minutes. It's for people that if something happens can still be at and see the most meaningful part of the wedding. Some people run late for a number of reasons and I want then there either way so how about you stop making it about you and just get there when the invitations says. I'm putting 430 when the wedding starts at 5.. 30 minutes will not kill you on the most important day of someone's life.

I concur with Celia. If everyone plans to arrive 15 minutes early, it is impossible for all of them to valet park, check coats, visit the rest room, greet each other, and be quietly seated in that short time frame. Picture 150 to 200 guests and all of the likely bottlenecks.

I advise my couples to invite guests 30 minutes before the planned start of the ceremony. If the ceremony starts late because guests are still arriving, it won't be shortened to end earlier. The very expensive cocktail hour will be shortened, and you and your guests will be cheated.

I would agree with having guests arrive 30 minutes early. There was confusion about the start time at a relative's wedding, and we thought we had time when we didn't. We thought guests were supposed to arrive at 4pm, and in fact the ceremony was scheduled to begin at 4pm, so we were some of the last people to arrive.

I also personally enjoy getting to visit with family/friends before the ceremony, and consider it a mini-social gathering before the ceremony begins.

I agree, sometimes people get a case of the TLDRs so it's better to simplify info on the website:

Ceremony will begin promptly at 4pm

Please arrive at 3:30 for ample time to park, check your coat, and find a seat

My ceremony starts at 5:30 PM and I'm putting 5:00 PM on the invitation. The place where I'm having my wedding does a hospitality suite 30 min before the ceremony. Those that arrive on time can munch of some little finger food and sip champagne with strawberries. I don't feel like I'm penalizing the on-time folks since they are being treated with a little something before the ceremony starts.

I'm thinking of having mine say seating starts at 345pm. The say ceremony promptly starts at 415 pm.

Put the false time. Trust me.