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Mandi
Dedicated July 2022

Invitations and kids

Mandi, on May 8, 2022 at 12:50 AM Posted in Planning 7 10
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I already sent my invitations out but I guess I didn’t give full details on how to fill out the card properly because I’m getting back blank invitations on top of not being filled out completely (no names, not filled out at all) but also, I didn’t think to write no kids on the card too. I don’t really want children at the wedding. When I sent out the invitations I put Mr. and Mrs. I did Not include family’s just the names of the people I invited. Am I wrong for not wanting kids there? And how do I approach this problem to the people who added their kids? Also, I don’t know if anyone else has this issue but I also have people asking if they are invited to the wedding and want to come but in all honesty I know them through other people but not personally. I apologize im under a lot of stress right now and really had to bring this into the discussions because I’m struggling to the point I can’t think straight anymore. And I’m really struggling. So any advice will be helpful at this point. Thank you

10 Comments

Latest activity by Mandi, on May 22, 2022 at 1:10 PM
  • Erin
    Super May 2022
    Erin ·
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    You’re not a bad person for wanting a no-kids wedding. You have a right to hold your wedding how you want to. For guests that did fill in their kids’ names, give them a call and politely say “Unfortunately we will be unable to accommodate children/anyone not listed on the envelope.” For people asking for an invite, a simple “Sorry, but we are having a small, intimate wedding.”
    Unfortunately most people are either ignorant when it comes to wedding etiquette, or were never taught. I know it’s stressful, but take a breath, stand your ground with people, and know that in the end, you’ll enjoy your wedding day!
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  • Mandi
    Dedicated July 2022
    Mandi ·
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    Thank you so much. I appreciate that a lot. And you worded that really well to so I will do that. Thanks again.
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  • Erin
    Super May 2022
    Erin ·
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    No problem! 😊
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  • Erin
    Dedicated November 2022
    Erin ·
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    You are definitely not wrong for not wanting kids there!! I agree with the above advice (also named Erin haha) that you should just reach out and politely remind them that the invitations were only addressed to the adults because you will not be able to accommodate everyone's children.

    I am lucky to have a venue that gave me a really good excuse for not wanting kids at the wedding. When people have asked me if they can bring their kids since my nieces will be there (they are IN the wedding though) I have told them that I have three nieces who will be in attendance and that my venue requires that I hire childcare for groups of 5 or more children. So for every 5 kids I would have to have a professional sitter. I told them if I let them bring their kids it puts me in the position to let other parents bring their kids and I just do not have it in the budget to provide childcare for everyone's kids. You can use my excuse if you need to!!

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  • Jacks
    Rockstar November 2054
    Jacks ·
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    One thing to caution, I would avoid using excuses at all, because the person being told "no" will try to "fix" the problem by offering solutions.

    "I"m sorry, but we're not able to accommodate your kids at our wedding" is enough of an answer. If they ask why, say "unfortunately it's just not going to be possible, but we're looking forward to celebrating with all of our adult guests!"

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  • Mandi
    Dedicated July 2022
    Mandi ·
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    Thank you I appreciate that. I can’t tell them the real reason why anyways. But saying that sounds appropriate in which I appreciate you and everyone before who helped with wording it correctly. It sucks because I wish I could explain it but it’s something nobody really needs to know about.
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  • Mandi
    Dedicated July 2022
    Mandi ·
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    Thank you other Erin lol 😂 I appreciate that
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  • Cathy
    Dedicated September 2022
    Cathy ·
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    I was just wondering how things are going with rsvps? My daughter’s invites will be here in next few days! I am also nervous about people rsvp’ing with children & wondered how the wording back to ppl that rsvp’d with kids was received? We have included wording on her web site that states adult only reception but not sure how many will go to the web site?
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  • Mandi
    Dedicated July 2022
    Mandi ·
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    Things are going well. Post office is a little backed up but I made phone calls to everyone and mom and I came up with a plan to make sure we have everything down. We asked certain people we haven’t heard from to at least text us with yes or no so that way we have a definite from them. And the response with the children went very well. Some had to make changes by finding a babysitter but they were very understanding. A lot of people don’t check out the website unless you tell them, but most people I had to remind to send their invitations back. But it’s all good. The only thing I suggest is we sent out our invitations out earlier then what wedding wire suggested so I would send it out earlier just in case you run into any issues.
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  • Mandi
    Dedicated July 2022
    Mandi ·
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    Also, make note when sending invitations a lot of ladies on here numbered their cards to peoples name and addresses on a separate sheet of paper. I didn’t number mine but I do have my names and addresses that make it easier for me to mark who I have to call or not. So there’s an idea
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