Invitations

You can address them however you see fit! Also, sending invitations to parents is normal, not weird. Whether they are contributing or not isn't really relevant. It's very respectful that you are putting thought into how each guest would prefer to be addressed - but don't overthink it too much.

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Thank-you so much for your reply. And too late, I'm already overthinking lol.

Of course I'm inviting my dad. I guess I just feel weird calling him "Mr. His Name" since he's always just been "Dad" to me. He probably won't even notice either.

View Quoted Comment That is pretty normal. I’ll be doing that for my parents and grandparents even though I never actually address them by their names. As for the rest, I agree that you can address them either way. I also was going back and forth because I agree about not mentioning the woman’s name but I think his family would prefer the “traditional” way. But in my opinion, I think you could do both.

So I found out after all of my RSVP return envelopes were addressed. . .Mrs is an outdated way to address women. All women (not girls) should be addressed as Ms. But of course it's totally up to you how you want to address your invites. Personally I would address them all the same formatting, but that is just how my brain works. And I only say it bc how your invite list is address typically is used the same way to address escort cards. I agree with you women are people and have a name as well, not tied to their husband's name. Mr & Mrs Smith was just too formal for me, we are not having that style of wedding.

We also included both people's names on our invitations - I agree that it feels odd nowadays to just put Mr. and Mrs. Husband's Name! For our invitations, if the couple was married and share the same last name, we put the husband first. If the couple was married but the wife kept her maiden name OR the couple wasn't married, we put whoever we were closest to first.

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Yeah, I wasn't planning to include Mr. or Mrs. at all on my invites but a member of his family sent us a list of addresses with everyone's name like that and I reached out to clarify if that's what was preferred and I was told yes.

For the escort cards I think I might just do Mr. Full Name and Mrs. Full Name (or Ms.) since I have to have individual ones for every one anyway (including kids) as the meal choice will be coded on these for the caterer.

I want to select my battles and not join the family in a way that makes them feel like I don't like them.

Edit: But you know at the same time not have to use a format that I personally would find kind of disrespectful to my friends (I wouldn't say anything if I were addressed by his name and not mine but it would feel disrespectful). I doubt the two sides are going to be comparing envelopes at the wedding.

I just wanted to add thank-you to everyone! I'm glad I'm not the only one worrying about this. It's very stressful and it makes me feel better to know I'm not alone.