Invited to wedding? Haven't spoken in 15 years? (Kinda vent)

I declined the invite but still went online last week and purchased a $100 gift off her registry and had it shipped to her house. But then I start thinking on my way home from work yesterday that I saw that her wedding date is 9/13 and I only know this because of her registry...here we are about a month and a half out and I have yet to receive and invitation to this wedding?

So I call my mom, and at this point I'm pretty irritated to think that I went out and spend $100 on a gift for a shower and have yet to technically know if I will be invited to the wedding? I would have much rather bought myself a pair of shoes with that money! But she said she hadn't received one yet, either, so I did feel a it better. Funny thing is is that I don't even really care to go to this wedding!

So now my two part question is: A. Is it odd that I was invited to this wedding? I maintain its just for the gifts, as it is almost guaranteed that I will give something as I will be in the same boat next year! B. Am I the only person who thinks that a month and a half is cutting it a bit close for sending out wedding invitations?

My sister sent out invites this week, her wedding is 8-16. Every one thought it was weird, and was also confused because they felt like she had a bridal shower and wasn't going to invite them to the wedding. I wouldn't invite her to your wedding, just because you were invited to hers. She may have been in the same boat as you where her mother "suggested" to invite you?

I think she may have invited you because your moms are still in touch and friends. I agree with Future Mrs. Matthews - maybe her mom suggested it. I do think she's cutting it close with the wedding invitations though.

Nice of you to get a gift for her shower. I feel like your invite to the wedding is also being encouraged by this girl's mother, but I don't think you should be offended in any way. She is cutting close on invitations, but you can either attend the wedding, or not (once you receive the invite). It's hard to explain other people's behavior, but an invite to enjoy an evening of food, dancing, and cake... oh and booze... well... hey, no one would blame you if you decided to go lol

The $100 gift is extremely generous! I have a similar situation history with a friend and have decided not to invite her to my wedding. With the exception of a few people, FH and I did the "one year rule". If we haven't gone out of our way to see (or at least speak to) a person in over a year, we really took some time to consider if they should be invited to our wedding or not. This applied to a lot of our college friends who we have lost touch with over the past few years.

I don't mind inviting her to mine, thats no big deal and I would go to hers (as long as nothing came up that I want to do between now and receiving the invitation as I won't hold that day open "just in case."), but thats because I'm in total bridal mode and like checking out other weddings right now!

If it is the mothers as the driving force behind this, I don't what they are thinking?!?! 20 years is a lot of time to pass between people and still think that we have a valid interest in the other's life. Oh well

It's definitely a bit odd to be invited to a wedding of someone you haven't spoken to in 10 years... and it is for sure cutting it close when sending out invitations only 6 weeks before the wedding. I'd freak if I didn't have a seating chart until like a week before the wedding lol.

Ahhhhh got it. Should have read more carefully! Definitely a little strange, but moms will be moms, right? I have a feeling my mom would try to do the same thing! haha.

Invite her to your shower but not your wedding. 6 weeks out she needs to start getting rsvps back, i bet she doesnt invite you at all. lame

Mom's do the darndest things. My mom is very close friends with my ex from high school's mother (wonderful lady, if only her son was as lovely as she is!) and because of it, FH and I ended up being invited and going to his wedding. Now excuse me while I frantically stuff envelopes and cry...

@Andi; thats the most baffling part of this whole situation: (assuming) that the wedding invites haven't been sent out yet at 6 weeks before! I'd be ready to go to her house and take back the pannini maker if she only want me for my gift!

NOTE: But, this engagement has been a curious thing to watch play out: NOTHING was mentioned of this groom to be on Facebook ANYWHERE (not one tag, check in, photo or anything by anyone) until all the Christmas Eve get together photos were posted and he is in their family ones. And then March rolls around and all of a sudden a status was made about being engaged (no ring, nothing showed. I don't know about you but I couldn't wait to show off a photo of mine!) and THEN to find out the wedding will be September...6 months later?!?! (And as far as I know there is no pregnancy!)

^ I wouldn't speculate on the FB thing too much. I never posted anything wedding related on Facebook..not even my ring. We both have very large families and I was only able to invite 2 (yes, 2!) friends and I did not want to deal with the onslaught of "Am I invited?" messages from everyone. A lot of people didn't even know until the day of as people started posting pics.

I don't have any advice, just wanted to share.

Sorry, let me clarify though. You DID have photos with you and your hubby on there, though, correct? I know I have tons of things of FH and I and am always tagging him and checking him in places (he says he secretyly likes it because it looks like we do a lot of cools stuff when in reality we're lame!). There was NOTHING of this guy until Christmas Eve...its like she met him on her way to her parents and decided to get married!

I know length of time together doesn't matter to many, but, like I said, that part just strikes me as quirky as she does a good amount of FB posts and so does he, judging by what he's posted with her that shows up on my newsfeed

I sent my invites out 2 months before..who knows. I know I invited some old friends, who I don't talk to often, because they've been like family. Maybe she felt like she should include you...orrrrr maybe she just wanted a gift lol.

Hold up you gave her a panini maker?????????If you don't get an invite for the wedding def get that sucker back,just break in while everyone is at the wedding

My fiance believes that anyone who send invites out really close to the wedding is pulling a stunt from the movie "my fake fiance" he is no longer allowed to watch wedding movies.

LOL...I try to spend around $100 for shower/wedding gifts unless I really don't care for the person (ends up around $50) or really LIKE the person ($150-200), but her registry sucked. Since I KNEW I wasn't going to the shower, I wanted to purchase it online and let BB&B deal with the shipping.

I also had a 20% off coupon that turned out to be for ONE item. So at first I was going to do this ugly Kate Spade vase and a serving plate, so I go to check out ant the total is $99 or so since it had only taken the percent off the plate, so I deleted that, got the panini maker and spent $103 after my coupon, so to me it was just the smarter purchase

Maybe her fiance was married and they were "lying low" on FB until his divorce was final?