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Jada
Savvy July 2022

Inviting some guest to the resort but not ceremony.

Jada, on October 27, 2021 at 1:47 AM

Posted in Etiquette and Advice 30

Hi all! Question, my fiancé wants to invite some people who aren’t invited to our ceremony to still come have fun with us at the actual resort (more family and friends) We are only inviting 28 people to our ceremony and reception. The only friend we are inviting is my best friend and his best...
Hi all! Question, my fiancé wants to invite some people who aren’t invited to our ceremony to still come have fun with us at the actual resort (more family and friends) We are only inviting 28 people to our ceremony and reception. The only friend we are inviting is my best friend and his best friend, the rest are close family members. But because it’s all family, he wants to make it like a wedding/family vacation by inviting more people to just the resort to be amongst the festivities outside of the wedding, which I’m totally cool with but is that tacky? I want people to still feel good that we’re inviting them on the trip cause honestly we’re picky about who we have around us during our wedding trip so it still means a lot to us that we even want some to come even though it’s just to have fun with us at the resort. But I don’t know if people would take it that way. HELP! Lol I’d rather not do that if it will offend people . The point of us doing that would be for the opposite. There’s even some friends of mine that I can’t invite to ceremony but I still want them to be there. Is it best to not invite them at all?? Ugh, this is tew much 😩🤦🏾‍♀️
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30 Comments

  • Jada
    Savvy July 2022
    Jada ·
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    Thank you so much Cece, I totally see where youre coming from. I think you’re right. Also, I appreciate how positive your energy was in your comment. I showed my fiancé the other comments and he said “wow I thought this was a wedding site why are they so mean .” Lol thank you for being nice even through disagreeing 💛💛🙏🏾
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  • Jada
    Savvy July 2022
    Jada ·
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    Totally see your point
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  • Cece
    Rockstar October 2023
    Cece ·
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    Absolutely! I think most people on this site truly want to help, but unfortunately sometimes the way advice is delivered can be rather harsh. I hope you stick with the forum and have more positive experiences moving forward!
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  • KYLIE
    Super May 2019
    KYLIE ·
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    I really don’t think most people want to be mean, I think a lot of people use directness to convey just how strongly they disagree with an idea. And per what you see here, a lot of people think this is such a bad, hurtful idea that they didn’t want to sugarcoat their thoughts.
    Just put yourself in a guest’s shoes: why would they travel and pay $200 a day to only see you maaaybe for a few hours after your reception, if you’re not too tired. And then they’d have to hear about from your invited guests what a great time they had at your wedding and how special it was to see you get married—not in a mean way, just in that gushing way people do after weddings!
    Would you really want to party pre-wedding when you have details to wrap up and want to get sleep and look your best for your big day? And after the wedding? How long would you expect people to stick around the next few days? It’s just asking an awful lot of people for giving them zero in return.
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  • Jada
    Savvy July 2022
    Jada ·
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    Thanks Cece!
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  • Jada
    Savvy July 2022
    Jada ·
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    Lol him thinkin they were mean is his opinion. We all have our opinions 💛
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  • Jada
    Savvy July 2022
    Jada ·
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    Thanks Theresa! I thought so, I actually didn’t even think of it as a possibility until my fiancé said it and got so excited about it as if it was a great idea lol my poor baby 🤦🏾‍♀️
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  • Jada
    Savvy July 2022
    Jada ·
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    We are very set on our guest list, I don’t think I mentioned any different in my question. And being picky or having a family reunion is not an either or. We are being picky, that is why we are only inviting family. But I love the redesign in another location idea, Thanks!
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  • E
    Devoted February 2023
    Elycia ·
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    To echo what others have said, this comes across as you can come but we don't want to pay for you to participate. It's tacky and I would personally see it as rude. If you want to do a larger reception after the wedding and closer to home where you can invite more people as a celebration of your marriage I think thats a better and more common option that a lot of people adopt for destination weddings.

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  • E
    Devoted February 2023
    Elycia ·
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    Exactly this

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