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Devoted July 2018

Is a rehearsal dinner mandatory???

Kena, on May 6, 2018 at 8:33 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 26

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I'm thinking of opting out of the rehearsal dinner. At first I thought it was necessary to have but now I'm not so sure. Securing a place for the rehearsal and then having a dinner and paying for everyone's food seems like a waste of money. I'm about 9 days shy of the 60 day mark and there's still so much to be done. I would rather put that money towards the balance of my photographer. We bought gifts for both sets of parents and our entire wedding party. Is a rehearsal and rehearsal dinner mandatory? Is it not as simple as walking in order? What's your thoughts 🤔🤔

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26 Comments

Latest activity by MrsD, on May 7, 2018 at 12:44 PM

Master July 2017
Going to the chapel · on May 6, 2018 at 8:46 AM
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A rehearsal and the accompanying dinner isn't necessary unless you are marrying in a church where the rehearsal is required.
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Devoted July 2018
Kena · on May 6, 2018 at 8:49 AM
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Oh I didn't know that... Thank you!! I was worried about coming across rude but that helped
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VIP May 2015
KiwiDerbyBride · on May 6, 2018 at 8:56 AM
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You don’t have to have a rehearsal. If you do, it’s generally accepted that you need to have a rehearsal dinner, but it can be as simple as beer and pizza at your house. But no rehearsal means no dinner required
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Devoted October 2018
Jamie · on May 6, 2018 at 8:56 AM
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A rehearsal dinner is only mandatory if you’re having a rehearsal. If you wish to skip both that certainly isn’t rude though I’d be nervous without a run through
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VIP August 2018
Shai · on May 6, 2018 at 8:57 AM
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Our rehearsal dinner is basically we’re going to dinner the night before at red lobsters. Mostly will be just our parents, siblings and the wedding party. Everyone is paying for their own meal but knowing my family somebody will end up paying for our stuff but we’re prepared for anyway it goes.
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Devoted July 2018
Kena · on May 6, 2018 at 8:59 AM
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I like the way you think!! 🤗🤗... I kept asking myself how hard is it to walk in order?... Surely we don't need a rehearsal and a dinner for a 5 to 10 minute thing.... I just feel because I'm a DIY 👰 that time and money could be spent on other things
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Devoted July 2018
Kena · on May 6, 2018 at 9:02 AM
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I thought about that but thought it would be rude of me to have people take time out of their busy schedule to rehearse for my big day then make them pay for their own food
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Devoted July 2018
Kena · on May 6, 2018 at 9:05 AM
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I thought about that as well... seeing as how my anxiety is always on a million I figured a brief run through would be nice I just didn't want to rent a space for it and then spend money feeding everybody again..
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Devoted October 2018
Jamie · on May 6, 2018 at 9:08 AM
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Yeah I totally understand that and if I thought it would cost too much I’d probably skip it too, but our venue gives us the space for rehearsal included in our wedding rental, and I was kinda just going to do pizza and cake for the bridal party and immediate family so it really shouldn’t cost me too much for the peace of mind
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Savvy May 2018
Callie · on May 6, 2018 at 9:30 AM
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I'm 9days out!!!
I haven't had a rehearsal nor do we plan too.
We have a great coordinator who is cueing everyone to walk so the timing isn't an issue. We are going to let everyone know the order via text or in person
The dinner would be a waste of money. We are having a potluck the night before for who ever wants to come but nothing fancy
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VIP May 2019
Swtnss238 · on May 6, 2018 at 9:34 AM
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We r having a rehearsal at the venue then going out to dinner with wedding party. They will pay for their own meals.
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VIP August 2018
Shai · on May 6, 2018 at 9:45 AM
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Everybody has their own idea of what they think is rude. And you also know your family and group of friends. Mines don’t think its rude it’s just what you do and they don’t have to come they want to so I say do what you feel you want to do.
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Devoted June 2019
Lola · on May 6, 2018 at 10:02 AM
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I don't think I am going to have a rehearsal either. My ceremony will be short, I don't have bridesmaids, and grandparents and parents aren't walking down the aisle. I was thinking maybe of having a short 15 minute meeting right when we get to the venue on Saturday, before pictures start. I think instead I am going to pick a place where everyone coming in from out of town can meet for cocktails.
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Devoted July 2018
Kena · on May 6, 2018 at 10:27 AM
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That makes a lot of sense.... I think I was more concerned with his side then mine... You know in any situation we're most comfortable with our own people. All of his friends are still kinda new to me... I think that's why I felt that way
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Savvy July 2018
Karen · on May 6, 2018 at 11:10 AM
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I'm stuck on rehersal dinner or not. What my planner and I came up with was a rehersal with a bunch of like finger foods and some drinks then a non-hosted, dinner afterward. My issue is I'm coming up tight in my budget.
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Devoted July 2018
Kena · on May 6, 2018 at 11:19 AM
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I can understand that.. we still have a balance on the photographer so whatever isn't mandatory won't be a priority... If I decide to do a run through it will be a quick 30min meet and greet with refreshments. Something super inexpensive like a meat, cheese and fruit tray. ( That idea just came to me) I personally think a rehearsal dinner just isn't worth going over budget for
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Devoted July 2018
Kena · on May 6, 2018 at 11:20 AM
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That's actually not a bad idea... A quick meeting before the ceremony
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Devoted July 2018
Kena · on May 6, 2018 at 11:21 AM
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I think that is way more common now than before... Having them pay for their own meals definitely helps with the budget
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VIP August 2019
Futuremrsk · on May 6, 2018 at 12:17 PM
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You don't have to have a rehearsal if you are having a regular ceremony. If there is anything to your ceremony that involves multiple moving persons you may want to consider it. We have to have a rehearsal since we are doing a handfasting ceremony and you can't do that without practicing it at least once!
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