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Amanda
Just Said Yes October 2022

Is it weird for a bride to cover cost of a bachelorette party?

Amanda, on May 6, 2022 at 5:06 PM Posted in Parties and Events 0 5
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Bachelorette party - Communication fail - bride covering cost

Hi everyone, first time poster here. About 6 months ago I confirmed with my MOH that I wanted to have a bachelorette party somewhere inexpensive but out of town. Most of our other friends have all done multi-day bachelorette party trips so this didn’t seem like an odd request for the group. We picked a beach town within driving distance and super cheap plane tickets (I got mine for $99) for those that wish to fly. I gave a few more suggestions on things I’d like to do, list of friends to invite, and then let her get on with planning.
Fast forward, we are now 2 weeks out from the trip and I found out that no details have been shared with the guests other than the date and the location. Flights have now gone up to over $600 and the Airbnb is also expensive. The 4 day trip over all will likely cost per person $1600. People are stressed that they are just learning about the cost and haven’t gotten an itinerary or any details about the trip.
I panicked and ended up chipping in 4k of my own money from my wedding savings to help lower the cost. I don’t want my girlfriends thinking I’m a bridezilla that is demanding an expensive bachelorette party. But I’m pissed that the lack of communication has brought us to this point. This was supposed to be a low-ish cost trip (understanding that it’s still a 4 day trip) I was hoping guests would have 6 months to plan and save. Am I wrong for chipping in the 4k? Is it weird for a bride to do this?
Note: all of the guests are in their 30s with well paying jobs but I don’t ever want to assume I know someone’s finances which is why I’m trying to lower the cost for folks as much as possible.

5 Comments

Latest activity by Michelle, on May 7, 2022 at 2:36 PM
  • Cece
    Rockstar October 2023
    Cece ·
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    Definitely not wrong to pitch in the money to help. To be honest, at this point, I think your best bet would be to reschedule the trip so everyone has more time to save and plan accordingly. Otherwise, I am afraid you are going to have a disappointing turnout; and those that do end up going may not be in as much a celebratory mood after having this huge financial burden sprung on them. They may also be less likely to want to do activities once there, if they require even more financial commitment. If there is not enough time to reschedule the trip, it may be a better idea to just plan an evening out locally, or maybe a 1 or 2 night stay at the nearest city.
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  • M
    VIP January 2019
    Maggie ·
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    I can't imagine how it would be wrong for you to assume the cost burden of your party instead of passing it onto your friends. But if it's out of your budget, then look into canceling and rescheduling at a later date/different location so there can be better planning and the costs don't spiral out of control. No one should have to pay $1600 to attend a vacation they didn't even choose.

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  • K
    Kylie ·
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    I don’t understand why if everyone knew the date and location they didn’t book their flights when you did?
    Not booking the Airbnb is a major fail on your MOH’s part, though.
    I’d reschedule.
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  • Jacks
    Rockstar November 2054
    Jacks ·
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    Well, the multi-day, $1600 trip might not be feasible for lots of reasons. I'm assuming these people will have to take time off work? Do any of these people have kids that will need coverage while they are away? Or pets needing care etc?

    Was everyone excited to be doing this trip back when it was first mentioned six months ago? Were people committed to going back at the start.

    If the reason for the stress is purely financial, then chipping in the $4 K would be helpful for sure. I would just worry that it would be adding pressure to your invited folks. when there may be more reasons for the reluctance.

    I hope it works out for you!

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  • Michelle
    Rockstar December 2022
    Michelle ·
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    This is a great example of why the destination weekends don’t work out as planned. If costs are a concern, scrap the original plans and go to cost effective Plan B. You are not responsible for their lack of communication. If they are not doing their part, then an alternative needs to be found. Im not a fan of destination bachelorette parties but that is very cost prohibitive for something that it seems like they don’t want to attend or else better effort for communication would have been reached. As the bride, you are the guest of honor so you don’t contribute a dime. The host (bridesmaids) cover costs. Hope everything works out for you.
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