Jack 'n' Jill (stag 'n' Doe) Party!!

Just be careful, you can end up spending more than you make at it, but the celebration aspect alone is so fun, damn i want to go to another one now just for the awesome games people play!

@amy - The bride and groom do pay for jack n jill. If anyone pitches in it is totally optional - hence the tickets...

@kate - yes even people who are not invited to the wedding can go/are invited - with the purchase of a ticket.. So basically the lady you work with that you know but aren't inviting to the wedding because you have budget constraints can come celebrate at the jack n jill if she would like to buy a ticket...

I feel the need to clarify that this is not a typical Canadian thing. It is very much regional, just like in the US. I read the original thread that OP linked to, and I think that this person's post explains it perfectly:

"Jack-and-Jill parties, or "Stag-and-Doe" as they are also called, are primarily popular in Canada in the small-town and maritime regions (which have much in common, culturally, with the 413 area code). You don't see them in Western Canada, and even in Toronto they are primarily an import brought with maritimers moving to the big city.

People who think of them as "tacky" typically have never lived in a town with fewer than forty-thousand people, and a multi-hour drive to the nearest movie theatre. In towns like that, the "Stag-and-Doe" is an *obligation* the bride and groom OWE to the community. It's something to do, as an alternative to the regular Saturday-night activity of going to the bar (there is only one in town) or curling at the community centre..."

@OTW my bridal shower had plenty of alcohol.

@Laura - They are a blast! Actually I was just at one this past weekend for a wedding I am a BM in in Nov. They had all kinds of stuff going on! And the raffles are my FAVORITE!!

And to answer the original question, I also think you should do it earlier, in Feburary would probably be better than a month before the wedding.

@Amy - I understand they do NOT pay for the shower but they DO pay for the jack n jill

@Amy let me try ...

Amy's point is that you don't have to put out MORE money for a bridal shower. You do have to put out more money for this party.

Ok.. I get that.. BUT Bridal shower is in general for women that are invited to the wedding only.. This is for EVERYONE.. And is completely optional for everyone including.

SoonToBeMrsR I would host the J&J in February...FH and I will be having one as well, however it will be 5 months prior to our wedding. My mother is throwing me a shower as well (i'm a lucky bride, she's thrilled to plan lol) and I know my MOH is planning a bachelorette (bc she can's stop talking about how excited she is for it lol) so we are spacing things out...J&J 5 months out, bridal shower 2 months out and bachelorette 1 week out. The bridal shower will be for the old school Italian women (on my side) and the J&J will be for ANYONE.

As far as a theme, I like the luau idea. A friend of mine once had a party in the middle of February that was luau themed...he cranked the heat in his house and everyone had a blast playing beach inspired games indoors in shorts and t shirts (some girls even brought bathing suit tops to wear lol) and drinking tropical fruity frozen drinks to cool us all off...it was a great night and everyone still talks about it 12 years later!

All the J&J parties I have been to were awesome and were done in place of a bridal party. Have it whenever you want, though I think the sooner the better. People are more likely to participate when having time between the wedding and J&J (and you will make out better &dollar I like the luau idea!

I was invited to one last year, and that was exactly how they did their ticket pricing. Also, buying a ticket entered you into the BIG raffle that they did at the end of the night. They also had a bunch of games (some free). Most people who won any money, gave it to the bride and groom at the end of the night.

This may seem weird to people who aren't familiar with Jack and Jill parties, but I would much rather pay to go to a party than sit down for an hour watching a bride open up gifts. --Just my opinion though-- all the bridal parties I have been to were extremely long and always the same.

Amy A - Some people recoup cash from their gifts but a lot of people do not. I'm thinking FH and I won't even come close to getting $8,000 in gifts.

Okay..stag and drags are very customary in Northern PA (in my hometown I saw signs all the time "so and so's stag and drag" with an arrow..It is the norm to open it up to the public (they don't have to be invited to the wedding)..I actually get FB invitations sometimes to stag and drags for weddings I know I won't be invited to. I didn't consider that rude while the majority of people in the US would..Simply because either they don't understand the premise/never heard of one.

Yes the point is to raise money for the wedding as well as the costs for the stag and drag.

Now to the questions the OP asked.

1. March 5th may be a bit too close..can you afford the wedding without the stag and drag? If not, I'd scale the wedding down..you don't know ahead of time how much you will make.

2. I feel like 30ish bucks is WAY too much..I went to a stag and drag that was 5 bucks and kids were free (kids aren't really stag and drag friendly anyways) (cont)

2..are you serving free beer at least? food? all of this was included to the one I went to just for 5 bucks..you can sell tickets in advance. Do you have an estimate of how many people will actually come? Are you popular in your area? DH and I didn't have one since we didn't have that many people that still live in our hometown to break out even..

How much have you budgeted for the whole stag and drag?

what really did well at the one I went to was jello shots, raffles to win money, tip boards (buying chances to win bottles of liquor), raffle baskets, etc. There were other casino type games that really didn't do as well at all. There were about 250 people that came out.

In short, please don't charge 35 it's waayyy too much. What is the norm to charge in your area btw?

Sorry for being post happy..just adding DH and I did not recoup our costs for the wedding..not that we minded though :-)