Let's Talk Regrets

Aside from planning a real wedding (instead of just getting married at a courthouse like I always wanted), I regret trying to do my own flowers to pinch pennies. They're not awful, but they're not the flowers I dreamed about. I wish I just sucked it up and purchased premade bouquets or got a florist to arrange the bouquets for me.

View Quoted Comment It is! 3 of my 4 bridesmaids live out of state (all over the country) and most of my girl friends attending do too. It was the easiest way to actually have one, still feel like a bride, and have all of the people I love be able to join me.

Full disclosure, I had the same regret. But nothing had transpired between us really, I just didn't know her well enough at the time and it was a rushed decision. I think that there would likely be a mutual agreement between you two about the decision for her to not be in the bridal party. I mean, missing the bachelorette party is a pretty big deal, so she may be thinking the same thing as you. Granted, I don't know her. I hope it works out!

I regret not having “___of___” printed on my wedding RSVP’s for number of guests attending (I used minted) so I could just fill in the second blank with whatever number I wanted.

Mine just had a long blank line where I wrote in “of 2” or however many people were in the invite on the second half of the line to hopefully cut down on any uninvited +1’s. It would have looked better if I had done it the other way but I didn’t think of it when I was making my invites. but it’s NBD I guess. 🤷🏻‍♀️

View Quoted Comment I’m sure you look beautiful in that dress. Don’t regret it!

My biggest regret is choosing the venue our parents pushed for vs the one we really really loved. But everything will be fine. It's not the end of the world.

My biggest regret was asking my future SIL to stand up. My fiancé is having his brother stand up (who is his only sibling). So I thought having my Future sil stand up seemed like the right thing to do. I’m an only child and I’ve always wanted a sister. Big mistake... She turned into maidzilla. Everything I did she did like, she went as far as telling my fiancé while I was on life support that I couldn’t have the necklace I wanted because we couldn’t afford it and she would be the bad person if he didn’t want to tell me. Needless to say I got the necklace. She told me I couldn’t have a bachelorette and bridal shower because I had a 40th birthday party. I begged my fiancé to let me ask her to step down. After dealing with her for 18 months he agreed she needed to step down. Unfortunately his brother won’t speak to me and barley speaks to him. She refuses to speak to either of us. I never would of imagined this to happen. We’ve had our share of drama with our wedding party. June 8th can’t come fast enough. We’ve joked we need a party a few weeks after the wedding to celebrate that the wedding is over. Definitely make sure you know the person you ask to be in your wedding party and that they are aware of their responsibility.

I’ve oddly heard that a lot, about pre-emptively selecting bridesmaids. Because of all the horror stories I’ve heard, I decided on only having two that I have absolute rock solid relationships with, my sister and my best friend! But who can blame you, I’m close with my FHs brother, and he had an absolute terror of a long term girlfriend that I would have asked to be a bridesmaid had she not shown her true colors first. (They also broke up thank goodness!)

I almost had a bridesmaid as a regret, but luckily she bowed out before it became one. She is the wife of one of my best friends and like a sister to my FH. Despite not really liking me (and downright disliking me for several years), she saw how we were together, and really supported us as a couple. I wanted to honor that and build on the relationship we were developing. Unfortunately, I realized that it was a rather shallow facade. While yes, she's happy for my FH, and thinks we're good together, she's not really ready to move forward in the friendship. I'm not sure if she even wants to (now or ever) - but is just too passive aggressive to tell me. She bowed out via text, and pretty much avoided talking (or was just terse) to me during any weekly hangouts.

After that, I was struggling to find another 'gal' I wanted. Once I got rid of the expectation that it had to be a female, I decided on a male friend who's been like big brother for 17 years. We hadn't really talked recently, but he was really grateful and honored. So I went from a rather stupid mistake to one of the best choices ever. Thank goodness...

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I got my dress a month after being engaged last year and wedding was 15 months away. About 4 months ago i started having panic attacks about the dress, in tears, and dreading telling my mom who chipped in for it that I may scrap it and get a totally new one. But when it came in and I tried it on again I realized what i didn't like and think have a resolution with altering (extra $&dollar to fix. hopefully that will make me at ease. We're also spending about $10k over original budget but I am over it at this point because i don't have time to spend cutting costs and DIY. It will all be great once we get there, in 168 days!

I am starting to regret not just doing something smaller and spending less money. My parents are being really encouraging (they are paying like half or more), but the last year has been so crazy with our job changes that I think it may have been smarter to scale down. Oh well. Most everything has already been planned and we will get everything paid for somehow.

I would have definitely cut my guest list some.. it is too late now since we already sent save the dates. Oh well!

I really regret my choice of DJ. He seemed solid but he truly messed up. Thank God the wedding was still great. But ugh,,, he was the worst part of the wedding. He put Spanish songs even though we never mentioned that in our list of song choice. We think that was his fall back songs. We chose Frank Sinatra, Michael buble, and bruno mars... how did any Spanish songs get in there???
Also he used the wrong version of the song we wanted for the groom and bridal party to walk down to, and he awkwardly cut my bridal walk song in a way that infuriated me... sigh. Mostly guests didnt notice... except for the Spanish songs and other songs he put in... everyone who went to our wedding knows that's not our style. I believe he was trying to get the party started when we specifically told him there would be no dancing except the first dance and every single one of our guests would know that and wouldnt try to dance either. I dont think he respected our decision. Thank God when he tried to play a particular song not to our taste (we were somewhere else), my MOH's husband ran to him and told him to cut it out. Like o saod,,, people who attended know us and know our taste. Ugh... sorry for the rant... it's still a sore spot for me

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Oh no!! That sounds terrible, but like you said, a lot of people (besides you) probably didn't notice a lot of it. Music is one thing that is super important to me too.. we didn't want to risk getting stuck with a cheesy DJ so I've been working on the Spotify playlists since last July..Our wedding is pretty laid back at a summer camp, so we figured we didn't really need a DJ. so sorry that happened to you!

View Quoted Comment It’s ok! You will be beautiful regardless! Have that make up and hair together and embrace your full bridal look!! Be confident! Hope you feel better!

View Quoted Comment Thanks sis ..I am feeling much better about my lil accident. The dress is really pretty and l have made my peace with it ❤

I'm so sorry!! My regret is my wedding gown. It's gorgeous and everything I've ever drempt of, but..... The sample was so large ( at least 4 sizes too big..couldnt even keep it on me with clips), we couldn't get a real feel. But I loved it and had the very unexpected " bridal cry." Then when it came in it was too tight and I'd not gained a pound. I feel fat and unattractive in it. It was very expensive and now I need at least $1000.00 in alterations. I just pray it looks good on me for my wedding and I don't hate our photographs.

My wedding will be next two years, learn your experience to avoid regrets

I was so excited about the wedding I asked a few people to be bridesmaids that now I realize I probably shouldn't have included. Not because I don't like them, just I realize now that we aren't THAT close. And I really only wanted a MOH and one or two bridesmaids and now I ended up with 5. And my FH asked 2 "groomswomen" so that adds to the overall expense because now we have to pay for 7 people to have hair and makeup done and 7 bouquets. And it's both of our second wedding so I am sure people will be wondering why we are having such a big wedding party. And since we are just about 40 days away, expenses are adding up so I am starting to freak out a little about money. But it will all be worth it. It will be a super fun reception and ultimately I will end up married to the man I love!

Mine is the same as yours Danielle, I wish that the excitement hadn't got me so damn excited and I would have took my time and choose my bridesmaid more wisely.... I love all of them but there are def a couple that if I could go back they would just receive invites to the wedding versus being apart of the wedding.... But with almost 80 days away and custom dresses done, I am just dealing with it.....