Limited Alcohol Receptions / Dry weddings (UPDATED)

@Miranda: Looking back, I can see how my words were judgemental, and for that I do apologize. Thanks once again for all your suggestions and replies. I really don't have any experience with logistics of planning weddings, so I was looking for some creative options.

Everyone - Thank you everyone for all your help, particularly with the idea of a 'consumption bar'. I wasn't aware that that option existed!

Please consider this thread closed, I don't to start a catfight on here.

I believe you're being judged for your willingness to have a cash bar and for implying that people without religion in America are likely to get drunk at weddings.

It's evidently OK to make your guests pay for drinks then, right? Since that was an OK option to you.

Wow, I don't think there will be a "catfight".

@Akshali, first of all, my comment was sarcasm; not dramatic.

For future reference, if you don't want "judgment" for a dry wedding, don't judge others for having an open bar. That was an unnecessary generalization and quite insulting.

Akshali, if it makes you feel better, I stopped drinking when I left college so I definitely don't drink and still have lots of fun. My FH, on the other hand, drinks a lot, and has come with me to the one wedding that had no alcohol & no dancing, and we still had a good time! We did NOT leave after one hour, in fact we stayed the entire time, as did everyone else there. Their reasoning was also cultural & religious.

If people don't know how to have fun without drinking and dancing at a wedding, then they don't know how to have fun at all.

@Jacks - I didn't realize cash bars would be such a no-no and considered rude. Actually, the only reason I was considering offering one for alcoholic drinks only was out of consideration for the few guests who might want to drink but would have no options. Hence, I just pitched an idea with a question mark because I didn't know what all the various options were - I only knew full open bar or cash bar. Now I know that cash bars are considered very rude, I won't do it. Thanks!

Well then...

Haha cat fight

At least have beer and wine....and NO FUCKING CASH BAR!!!!!!

Yes to what CMC just said

@Akshali, you might want to read some of the stickies for new users, including "hot button" topics.

I would like to mention some counterpoints to the very obvious judgement issued by OP:

TONS of VERY religious people drink both ceremonially and recreationally. As a bride from a Catholic extended family marrying a Jewish man in an Episcopal Church (with an open beer & wine bar in the parish hall), I can testify to that.

Lots of nonreligious people may not drink at all for other reasons (health, family history, personal preference etc)

Having alcohol & liking a drink or two =\= "needs to get drunk to have fun".

Second what @AMagill said. I went to a Catholic university with a seminary on campus. The seminary had their own bar.

Also, "please consider this thread closed" is not a thing.

OP may have made some judgments, but you're all judging her as well, so ... ??

We are Lutheran (me) and catholic (my FH) and we definitely enjoy the occasional alcoholic beverage.

I may or may not be drinking a glass of wine as we speak. Lol

Quesrasera, we're judging the idea of a cash bar, not the OP.

Well she commented that she didn't realize it was such a tacky idea and that she liked the idea of a consumption bar and everyone kept going with the harshbrowns. Am I the only one that read that comment?

6am ceremony and dry reception....hard pass.

OP, you may want to put "updated not having cash bar" in your original post.

Actually, @queserasera, the only things judged by other users here were the dry wedding and the generalization made by OP.

OP made the judgmental generalization that those who don't fit into a very specific criteria get wasted at weddings.

The difference here being other users made comments on her idea and then responded when the insulting comment was made by OP; OP made the comment about people.

And everyone's said what's needed to be said about the generalization. It's done, it's over with, OP apologized, le fin.

As someone pointed out, it would be wise to update the original post, as to avoid more comments on the dry wedding idea for those who don't read the whole thread, but until that happens and/or people get caught up, they are allowed to comment on it as they please (as long as they follow the CGs).