Lingerie? Bridal shower? Mom?

You're not supposed to plan the shower. And being large busted, it's going to be tough to find stuff that fits correctly so you'll need to try stuff on anyway. So I'd agree you buy your own lingerie so you know what looks nice and let the planners plan.

I just feel like it would take some of the fun out of the experience. The lingerie is the most exciting part!!

Lingerie shopping can be fun. I'll like to shop for lingerie if a friend permitted me too; however, if your mom will be present, I'll say Don't Do it! Its weird....!

You still have a lot of time to convince your mom for the BS venue... am sure she'll come around. Its your happy moment and she would not forget that. Have fun planning

Well then, do the sexy night wear

""You" should''t have any say in the shower at all. Neither, really, should your mom.

I don't honestly think the lingerie is the most fun part for anyone except you (and eventually your husband...) Helping plan my own shower and then opening undies in front of all my guests (including my mom) sounds mortifying, honestly.

@joy "elegance" are you referring to a lingerie shower instead of having them together?

@Celia well I say it's the most exciting bc we've been abstaining so you could imagine why it's so exciting!

I guess that'll be nicer. Do a lingerie shower with your friends... And then mom can take care of BS

If your friends want to buy lingerie, they can give it to you at the bachelorette (if you're having one). That works better with the overall theme, as a bach party is the only time when it's acceptable to, say, eat a penis-shaped cake.

But seriously, it's going to be tough for people to buy stuff that fits you, especially if your friends have smaller, easier-to-fit sizes (looking at you, 34Bs...super jealous).

Maybe invite your friends out to go lingerie shopping? That way, you get a fun outing, you're not gift grabby, and no one has to make grandma uncomfortable.

Lingerie should be a bachelorette style thing, a shower should be more "family friendly" ... And yeah you shouldn't really make any decisions for your own shower. But at the same time, a Bach party isn't for gifts. Why don't you buy your own lingerie so that it's less awkward for everyone. I mean, are you really gonna wanna wear lingerie that a family member picked out for you? Personally it would freak me out.

I feel ya. I would have preferred a lingerie shower because out of everything? that would be the most useful thing to receive (seriously so tired of sports bras for goodness sake and honestly i feel awful spending $60 for a nice bra)

but when i mentioned it my mom and friend were mortified. the thought of doing this with my FH family made them squirm. and since i wasn't the one throwing it? that was all the say i had in the matter.

you really don't have a say in the shower itself outside of guest list, really, and even then it's not your event. it's thrown in honor of you, but not by you.

be patient and try not to let it bum you out (like it did for me lol)

I'm surprised that so many people are weirded out by the lingerie thing. Most of the showers I've been to have had brides who receive a mixture of lingerie and household. I don't want to fill like I'm settling, but I guess it would be better to just buy my own so I know what fits.

@Enya you're right. I wouldn't want anyone to spend the type of money I spend on a bra or two lol

I am also busty so its hard enough for me to shop for lingerie myself. I wouldn't be weirded out same as you even with a non themed bridal shower the ladies in my circle usually buy some kind of lingerie for each other. My biggest concern would be having the lingerie theme and nothing fits right that could be a pain returning or doing exchanges at different stores.

Your mom is throwing the party, so I don't think you get the final word. If she doesn't like that theme then I think it's her call. I would suggest speaking with you MOH/BMs about having a lingerie themed bachelorette or bridal shower that's just you and the girls, cocktails and games, with no family elders.

You are not supposed to be involved in the planning of your shower. You don't get to pick the theme, or location, or anything lol. Your mom isn't even supposed to throw it either lol - it should be another female family member, or godmother/family friend, or your bridal party.

I think that a lingerie shower is better for a bachelorette party. Especially if you require specialty lingerie, that's not really fair to ask your guests to spend $50 or more on just a bra for you.

I really dislike buying other people's sex clothes. If I go to a lingerie party, I usually just buy a "bride nightie".

Your mom is kind of right. There's a time and place for everything. That's what bachelorette parties are for. I'm sure your family members don't want to see the lingerie you're going to f**k your husband in.

You should not be planning your own shower - it comes across as gift grabby. Also, don't expect your guests to want to be told to buy you lingerie. A lot of people do not feel comfortable buying sexy underwear for their friends FOR A SHOWER. If your girls want to gift you lingerie during a bachelorette party that is one thing but bridal showers typically include aunts, mothers, grandmothers, etc. I.E. people who do not want to see what you wear to the bedroom.

I feel very awkward buying lingerie for other people and watching them open it. To me that is a private part of your life. Plus if your busty that gets expensive and you don't really have a price range for your guest.