Losing your Father unexpectedly before your wedding.

I know that last words you want to hear right now is I am sorry, but you are defenitley in my prayers and thoughts! I lost my dad three years ago to an incurable rare cancer. While it wasn't sudden I know how you must feel to not have him there that day. It will be emotional as I expect mine to be and I have even had more time to get use to him not being around. Not trying to make you feel worse! It is a good thing you moved the wedding, no need for there to be stressed especially during that time of year. Again your in my prayers and I hope your wedding is everything you have ever wanted despite loved ones not being able to make it!

I am so sorry for your loss.

I had almost exactly the same thing happen in Feb of this year. My dad had a Sudden Cardiac Arrest with no warning what so ever. They managed to resuscitate him in the ambulance but he never regained consciousness due to brain damage and we made the decision to let him go a week later.

It was the most horrific experience of my life. Made worse by the fact I was living across the other side of the world and hadn't seen him for six months at the time he passed away.

Even though I'm just in the early planning stages of my wedding the thought that he won't be there to walk me down the aisle kills me. There are days when I want to cancel the whole thing because I cannot imagine how I am going to get through the day without him there.

But I will say in terms of the grief, it gets easier, but it never goes away. It will be 9 months since Dad left us on the 14th and there still isn't a day I don't think about him.

Next year, when my brother walks me down the aisle, I will still be thinking about Dad and I know he'll be there in spirit.

You will get through the day, and it will still be an incredibly happy, wonderful day. But it will be a little bitter sweet.

For me the hardest part is that because I lived in another country, Dad never got to meet my FH. And that breaks my heart because they would have loved each other.

Oh, I'm so so sorry for your loss. I hate so much that anyone has to go through this too. My dad, who was an absolutely amazing daddy, died of heart disease in March this year. While he had been sick for a few years, the end was very, very sudden and completely devastating. My dad will have been gone exactly 13 months on my wedding day. I know it was hard to postpone your wedding, but speaking from experience, I am much more able to talk and think about him 8 months out than I had been at 3 months. Like the previous poster said, it still hurts, and there are still things that will set me off, but I can remember the good things as well now without bawling.

I have a few homages to him at my wedding: bouquet charms and an origami backdrop of paper airplanes (he was a pilot). No matter what you chose to do at your wedding, I'm sure it will be lovely. And I hope I'm not overstepping by saying this, but I'm sure he would be proud and will be there in spirit. My thoughts are with you.

My sincere condolences and prayers to you during this time.

Hang in there. I lost my mom who was my best friend and closest person to me In the world, this past April after a very quick and surprise battle with cancer. People say time heals. It doesn't heal you just learn to relive. I know most people want someone just to tell them it will be okay but I wish I had someone in my life that gave me the truth, so I'm sorry if this isn't helpful to you. If you haven't already I highly suggest seeing a counselor. I have for the past couple months and it has been helping. Honestly I'm 7 months into the journey without my mom and I still don't believe it and it feels like she will be back. I'm afraid my wedding will be a wake up call that she's not coming back. Hang in there!! Do whatever you need to and try to enjoy your wedding. We loved our ceremony up and got my dress and planned a seperate wedding so I could have my mom there and she wasn't well enough come the day it was planned. We cancelled and she passed the next day. I can't believe things happen for a reason and it's been a big adjustment. At the end of the day it's just not fair and it sucks so much. I'm angry and you have every right to be as well!! Lots of hugs to you and I'm so sorry that you have to go through this.

I'm so sorry. I lost my dad three months before my quincenera, he had been sick for a long time but nothing prepares you for it! He ultimately did not die of his illness but instead had an unexpected heart attack. I thought I had moved through the grieving, since it was 11 years ago, but planning my wedding was tough!!! I hope the best for you!!! Hugs!! I found it very comforting to have my mom walk me down the aisle and I had a picture of my dad tied into my boquet, so he was also walking me down the aisle

I am so sorry for your lost. I love my father as well to unexpected cardiac arrest in February 2013.

I didn't even know how I was going to function and had so much tr uncle even thinking about the wedding. DH was there every step of the way no matter what I needed.

Lean on those closest to you and they will help get you through this time, you will be in my prayers.

I cannot even begin to comprehend the pain you're in right now, but just wanted to say that I will be praying for you and your family. <3

All my love and positive vibes your way! and a tight hug for all of you ladies. xoxo

As someone who lost her parents before her wedding, just know that you'll be ok. You won't seem like you will be - you'll be angry, you'll be full of rage, you'll be sad, you'll be depressed. That's all part of grieving and no one should tell you how to grieve. You're going to hate people telling you, "Your dad would be so proud of you" or "I wish your dad can see you now." You'll hate to hear about father-daughter dances or mother-son dances, you'll want to find a way to memorialize him. You will be very sad during your wedding process. It will be one of the hardest things you do. But you will eventually be ok. Take the time to grieve. Planning a wedding is stressful enough and grief on top of that makes things so much harder. Do what you need to do to heal. Maybe you need to not have any special dances. Maybe you need to walk down the aisle by yourself (or maybe with you mom or even fiancé). Maybe you don't want certain things done because it reminds you of your dad. Maybe you do.

Just remember, no one can tell you how to grieve. Your wedding will make it so much harder, but just know that somewhere, sometime, you will feel normal again. Hugs.

My heart goes out to each of you daughters who have experienced such intense loss. I wish there was something to say that would ease your pain. Thank you, Erica. The voice of experience is usually the voice of wisdom. Today, tomorrow, and on your wedding days, your parents are with you and in you. They always will be.

I'm sorry for your loss. It's never easy losing a parent. My mom passed away 4 years ago and my dad passed away earlier this year. I was very close to my dad. I never thought he wouldn't be with us when I got married. I'm going to have a piece of his shirt sewn into my wedding dress so a piece of him with physically be with us. My sister (MOH) is walking me down the aisle and she's dancing with me for the father/daughter dance.

So sorry for your loss, there are no words that will make you feel better but you did the right thing by postponing the wedding. I think that will give all of you more strength and even though it wont change the fact hes not here, he will definitely be present at your wedding.

I'm sorry for your loss and pray your family is comforted day by day. I was just in my friend's wedding last month and her mom who she was very close to(and who helped her with all planning) passed away 2 months prior. It was difficult and she had some moments where she needed more support and we were right there for her. I believe she enjoyed her day knowing her mom wanted her to have a wonderful wedding and be happy and it sounds like your dad would want that for you too.

Thank you all for your supportive and precious comments. I am touched by each and every one of them. To everyone on here who has lost a parent, I am deeply and truly sorry for your loss. You are in my prayers and thoughts too. It comforts me to hear your stories and to know I am not alone in this journey of being a Bride to Be while dealing with the pain of losing a dad or mom.

Thoughts and Prayers to you and your family!!

EricaTx could not have said it better! Grieve then grieve some more, but don't let anyone tell you what is a right or wrong way to do it. I honestly believe that healing process will make your day that much better. It will still sting, it will still hurt and the memory will be vibrant. I know that on my wedding day I am going to be a wreck without my father, so I think I am going to set a time to just be alone and think about him/ cry a bit to get it out of my system. I usually weekly private fb message him, its like a journal from me to him, so I will probably do something like that the morning of to keep him in the loop. Just a suggestion, if you think you will break down like me! Feel better, hugs XXX

I'm really sorry for your loss

My husand and I both lost our fathers during the wedding planning, as well as 2 other relatives.

both were expected, so I can't imagine loosing anyone the way that you did, I admire your strength!

I'm so sorry for your loss- for what it's worth, I think you did the right thing giving yourself more time. I threw myself into focusing on the wedding and that I had such a wonderful life event coming up.

we dealt by toning things down a lot, and though that's not right for everyone, it was right for us. do what is right for you, but for me cutting the guest list dramaticly was a good move. though I wanted my walk down the aisle in a beautiful gown, and a beautiful cake to cut, I just wasn't up to a room full of people on our day.

I had panic attacks wondering if I had done the right thing, but it was the right thing my fellow brides on here were wonderful support during the whole thing.

hang in there, and I suggest using WW as much as you need to for support- It can be a great one

I lost my dad too. I am impressed with your ability to move the wedding date. Changing the date so soon is not easy, but I am sure everyone understands. As you continue to plan your wedding, remember it is your wedding. It is not a day to mourn your father. I plan on not over doing things that remind me of my dad so I'm not crying the whole day. I'm remembering my dad with butterflies. That was our thing. I am putting butterflies here and there in my wedding without it being a butterfly themed wedding. I want to strategically place them to give me a sense of his presence. Spend the next couple of months figuring out how to make your connection with your dad at the wedding.